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Category: Boris Johnson

Brexit Fools' Day

Brexit Fools’ Day

Updated on date by author

“Ever get the feeling you’ve been conned?” Johnny Rotten

On Brexit Fools’ Day we look at some of the things we’ve been fooled by:

World Beating COVID deaths

The “British vaccine”, developed by foreigners

£350 million per week for the NHS … we’re still waiting

Taking back control of our borders means a border in Kent

Taking back control of our fish means the destruction of our fishing industry

Shoplifters of the world unite – Art by Cold War Steve

The Turing scheme to replace Erasmus

There would be no border in the Irish sea

The main beneficiaries from Brexit turn out to be portaloo providers

Trade will be frictionless

Unprecedented red tape and companies going to the wall due to Brexit

A free trade deal that has non tariff barriers and many other faults

Unsettled status

VAT on imports from Europe

£37 billion spent on a failed Test and Trace system

Falkland Islands thrown under a Brexit bus

Gibraltar to gain independence

UK break up began

Police racists found not to be racists by racist Government

“20 000 COVID deaths would be a good outcome”

£5000 fines for leaving the country, unless you are Stanley Johnson

£2.4 million spent on some decor in 10 Downing Street

Statues are more important than women

What would you add to the list? Drop me a line

“Won’t get fooled again” – Roger Daltrey

Actually Roger, you will get fooled again if you vote Tory

Swing out sister
SuspEND Brexit
We need £1000 for printing leaflets to defeat the Tories in May elections – pl click on the image to support us

Help defeat the Tories on May 6th

Posted in Borders, Boris Johnson, Brexit, Corona, Fish, Politics | Leave a reply
Brexit Now

No deal no problem

Updated on date by author

No deal no problem? At the time of writing there is still no date set to ratify the Brexit trade and cooperation agreement. If this continues, by end of this month, arrangements in the Brexit agreement become null and void. In the extreme, this would mean that Britain would have to trade on WTO terms, i.e. No Deal Brexit with tariffs and quotas on goods. You may ask “Why the delay in ratification?” Well, Boris Johnson continues to break international law. All agreements require trust and we are in negative equity on this commodity.

Trust is essential for Trade Johnson's Britain is in negative equity
Trust is essential for all trade and business – The UK is not trustworthy

This will almost certainly be unpopular but I’d personally like No Deal Brexit now. It will give Brexiteers their lived experience and offer the quickest way back to EU Membership after we have disposed of the Brexit Junta. I argued for No Deal Brexit through most of 2020. I was assassinated by Remainers who followed the herd of National groups such as Best for Britain, The European Movement, some regional groups and individual Remain elite mouthpieces who said “No to No Deal”. In effect these people facilitated Brexit. As a result we have a Brexit deal that is the proverbial slow boiling frog. The government is also able to mask Brexit by claiming that COVID is the cause of any problems.

See Brexit Choices for more insights into our mistake as Remainers.

No deal no problem

What we have now is a slow death. No deal is a sudden death. Both result in death but one is more painfully slow than the other. Take your pick.

THINGS TO DO

Please support our campaign to defeat the Tories in local elections. See Local Elections 2021 for more information. We need £1500 for leaflet design, production, distribution, social media ads and costs minimum.

Please support our campaign to take to the streets in Summer via our We are Everywhere campaign. We need $400 to make a video and £1000 to run the campaign.

Please join our Anti-Brexit Super Spreaders group on Facebook to multiply our impact online.

Please conduct your own actions to stop Brexit. Find 11 ways to do this here.

Brexit - it's going well isn't it? Image by Cold War Steve
Brexit – it’s going well isn’t it? Image by Cold War Steve

No deal no problem?

Posted in Borders, Boris Johnson, Brexit, Britastrophe, Economics, Europe, Politics | Leave a reply

Get The Tories Out

Updated on date by author

We have 20 000 leaflets available for non-party campaigners to help #GTTO or Get The Tories Out by Friday 7th May. By sending them a massive shock wave in the local elections, we hope to point out their vulnerabilities. Nothing moves politicians quicker than losing their seats.

To get physical copies of leaflet, mail me at gtto@academy-of-rock.co.uk

To have the leaflet badged with your group’s logo or details, get in touch

To simply use the leaflets online, just download the images below

Support us so we can print more and deliver them via the Bollocks to Brexit Mini via Go Fund Me

Get The Tories Out
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Get The Tories Out
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Get ‘Em Out by Friday

We are taking the Mini on the road – let us know if you want a visit
Posted in Borders, Boris Johnson, Brexit, Britastrophe, Elections, Politics | Leave a reply
April Brexit Showers

April Brexit Showers

Updated on date by author

In our occasional round up of April Brexit Showers via the medium of populist media parody, we offer you “The Sun”. The only difference with The Sun is that we include some facts …

I have to include a fact and fiction checker just for clarity:

FICTION : When Liz Truss said she got a great trade deal with Japan, she meant “for Japan”. A really good deal in fact, with five times the amount of trade going to Japan.

FACT : Dairy exports have fallen by 96% due to Brexit.

FACT : Meat exports have also fallen by 25% and these losses are expected to be permanent.

FICTION : Rachelle does not plan a trip to Scotland or Ireland. Nicola Sturgeon does not need her help to Get the Tories out in Scotland. Rachelle is however available for modelling assignments in France.

FACT : Northern Ireland is beginning to become the great tragedy of Brexit as tensions continue. This is not news. It was always predicted to be the case.

FACT : If you want to help get the Tories out at the local elections, contact me for leaflets via email gtto@academy-of-rock.co.uk. We have 12 000 left for rapid distribution.

If you like this article, please tip us using the Paypal button on this site or via GoFundMe

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Say no to the new variant Brexit – Write to your MP and the press using the facts in this article to make your case

Read our guide to Brexorcism

Join us every Monday at 8 pm to Re-Boot Britain

Support our local election campaign

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Posted in Borders, Boris Johnson, Brexit, Cummings, Elections, Europe, Farming, Food, Politics | Leave a reply

Get the Tories out

Updated on date by author

We have delivered 20 000 leaflets to help get the Tories out and Re-Boot Britain in the last 10 days. This is quite astonishing when one considers that it has been done with just 12 people and a Mini Cooper. There are 23 million houses in Britain and our 20 000 leaflets represent 1/1000 of those houses. Not bad at all for a micro organisation. To help support our work, please donate using the PayPal button or via Go Fund Me for a regular donation.

To join us on the tour, here are our dates this coming week:

  • Monday : Gravesend from 11.00 am
  • Tuesday and Wednesday : Tunbridge Wells from 10.30 am
  • Wednesday evening : Maidstone from 6 pm
  • Thursday : TBC
  • Evening slots available most days by appointment

Please contact me directly via gtto@academy-of-rock.co.uk to join us

Here is our report from the street from stalwart campaigner Don Adamson

If you like this article, please tip us using the Paypal button on this site or via GoFundMe

We need support to continue doing this. It takes considerable time. Thank you in advance.

Say no to the new variant Brexit – Write to your MP and the press using the facts in this article to make your case

Read our guide to Brexorcism

Join us every Monday at 8 pm to Re-Boot Britain

It’s all at the Co-op
Posted in Boris Johnson, Brexit, Britastrophe, Corona, Elections, Politics | Leave a reply
Breaking Point

Breaking Point

Updated on date by author

At what point do you consider that “enough is enough” in terms of voting conservative in the local elections? Are you at breaking point yet? Ask yourself the following questions?

  • Do you mind that Boris Johnson promised fishermen that he would take back control of their waters only to find that this was a red herring?
  • Do you mind that Liz Truss has done a trade deal with Japan that gives them five times more trade than we get?
  • Do you mind that Matt Hancock wasted £37 BILLION of your taxes on fictional Test and Trace equipment?
  • Do you mind that Boris Johnson presided over up to 80 000 unnecessary COVID deaths?
  • Do you mind that the Conservatives are now unhappy with the Brexit deal it signed off without reading?
  • Do you mind that Boris Johnson lied to The Queen?
  • Do you mind that Boris Johnson will be judge and jury at an enquiry about his conduct as the leader of your country?
  • Do you mind that Boris Johnson said there would be no border in Ireland and now there is as Brexit marks a return to “the troubles”?
  • Do you mind paying £35 ++ in tariffs and taxes for goods imported from Europe when we were promised that trade would be frictionless and free?
  • Do you mind that India and other countries require freedom of movement as part of any trade deal with Britain? This is the very thing that the Conservatives promised to stop through Brexit.
  • Do you mind that you were lied to about Brexit, COVID and Grenfell?
  • Do you mind that James Dyson was paid millions and never made a single COVID ventilator?
  • Do you mind that UK trade in dairy products has been decimated by Brexit?
  • Do you mind that farmers are unable to get workers to pick fruit and veg after Brexit?
  • Do you mind that the wallpaper used to redecorate Downing Street costs more per roll than most people earn in a week?
  • Do you mind?
  • Do you mind?
  • Do you mind?

Vote for any party other than the Tories on Thursday May 6th

Breaking Point
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Breaking Point
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Breaking Point
Breaking Point
Breaking Point

Are you at breaking point or don’t you mind being lied to constantly?

If you like this article, please tip us using the Paypal button on this site or via GoFundMe

We need support to continue doing this. It takes considerable time. Thank you in advance.

Say no to the new variant Brexit – Write to your MP and the press using the facts in this article to make your case

Read our guide to Brexorcism

Join us every Monday at 8 pm to Re-Boot Britain

Posted in Borders, Boris Johnson, Brexit, Britastrophe, Corona, Europe, Farming, Fish | Leave a reply

Swan Vista

Updated on date by author

Boris Johnson has declared war on France, leading the charge in a flotilla of pedalos. Fearless Johnson was reported to have said:

We will fight them in our britches. We will fight them with our swans. Our swan vestas. Our Vesta Chow Mein. We will never surrender!

In other news, it is the local elections in England, Wales and Scotland today. Make sure you vote and don’t vote for a swan or a signet.

The new royal yacht

If you like this article, please tip us using the Paypal button on this site or via GoFundMe

We need support to continue doing this. It takes considerable time. Thank you in advance.

Say no to the new variant Brexit – Write to your MP and the press using the facts in this article to make your case

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Join us every Monday at 8 pm to Re-Boot Britain

Posted in Borders, Boris Johnson, Brexit, Britastrophe, Europe, Fish, Politics | 2 Replies

What the papers won’t say

Updated on date by author

Forget Hartlepool. Forget the gaslighting of Gove, Jenrick, Johnson et al. Here’s what the papers won’t say about the local elections. It seems that the our efforts as non-party campaigners helped quite a bit. The Tories lost overall control of Tunbridge Wells, with the leadership of Nick Pope and the Lib Dems in that area. We also helped turn parts of Kent Green with an incredible team of people who went out leafletting and talking on the street. I also understand that these results spread far and wide through those who took our leaflets in Hampshire, Scotland and the West Country. In most cases, we made a contribution to the leavening of the Tory vote across Britain. Tory party HQ will be discussing these results more than the story they want us to focus on. We are still awaiting insights from Swindon, Cornwall and some other places.

A massive thank you to the team who designed the leaflet, produced the graphics and layout and who went out tirelessly to deliver them. Also a big shout out to EU Flag Mafia for the loan of the Mini Cooper.

Our next projects aims to re-energise people to take to the streets across summer. We need £260 for a video and up to £500 to pay for social media ads to mainstream the initiative “We are Everywhere”. To contribute, please go to Re-Boot Britain. Please join us on Monday 10 May at 8 pm to help design the video release. Here is a draft which the film maker is to improve upon:

In other news, next Friday, we are part of a major marketing campaign to Rejoin the EU via The New European.

What should we have learned from this election?

COVID has taken residence in people’s minds. Low turnouts. A retreat to the safety levels of Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs in the face of post-COVID PTSD.

What the papers won't say

Scotland deserve better than Brexit.

Brexit won’t lie down and any party that thinks it will must reflect, learn and act.

An unwillingness to collaborate allowed the Tories to maintain the illusion that they won.

If you like this article, please tip us using the Paypal button on this site or via GoFundMe

We need support to continue doing this. It takes considerable time. Thank you in advance.

Say no to the new variant Brexit – Write to your MP and the press using the facts in this article to make your case

Read our guide to Brexorcism

Join us every Monday at 8 pm to Re-Boot Britain

Re-Boot Britain – What The Papers Won’t Say

Posted in Boris Johnson, Brexit, Britastrophe, Europe | Tagged , | 1 Reply
Railway Modeller

Trains and Goats and Planes

Updated on date by author

In our occasional series of Brexit satire we offer you Railway Modeller and The Northern Farmer. Plus a fact checker to help you tell Brexit facts from fiction.

Railway Modeller
Trains and Goats and Planes

FACT and FICTION checker

FICTION : AC DC’s Angus Young does not have a signature hormone fed steak pie. He has a signature Gibson SG.

FACT : Australian beef is hormone injected. It can be selectively fed to children and vulnerable people as UK Government rules allow for cheap food to be dumped on schools, the NHS and care homes. Our EU membership protected us from dodgy food standards but we opted for a blue passport.

FACT : Liz Truss has NOT struck a great trade deal with Japan. Japan benefits five times more than we do. Our desperation to get Brexit done makes us an easy target for “fire sale” type trade deals. Truss wants to claim success by striking a deal with Australia. We will pay for this dearly. Free trade in 15 years time will decimate the economies of Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland and parts of England.

FICTION : Boris Johnson is not a train enthusiast. Allegedly he paints cardboard buses.

FACT : The rebrand of Great British Railways is an expensive distraction. See Grant Schapps’ ludicrous flag shagging video filmed with emotional music at the National Railway Museum in York, shortly to be renamed the Great British Brexit Museum.

FICTION : Mallard is not being put back into service, nor The Rocket to power HS2.

FACT : The Australian trade deal will spell a sharp decline in farming in Wales, Scotland and Northern Ireland.

FICTION : Ringo Starr is not stuck in the tunnel from Scotland to Northern Ireland. The tunnel is a work of fiction rather like Brexit.

FICTION : Jennifer Arcuri is not a farmer. She is about to release a TV drama in which she describes her sex life with Johnson : “We read sonnets to each other, then he rolled onto me like a binbag full of custard, gasping like an asthmatic octogenerian, as he reached his climax & I wondered if he’d got it in yet”.

If you like this article, please tip us using the Paypal button on this site or via GoFundMe

We need support to continue doing this. It takes considerable time. Thank you in advance.

Say no to the new variant Brexit – Write to your MP and the press using the facts in this article to make your case

Read our guide to Brexorcism

Join us every Monday at 8 pm to Re-Boot Britain

Posted in Australia, Borders, Boris Johnson, Brexit, Britastrophe, Cheese, Corona, Cummings, Farage, Farming, Food, Sovereignty | 2 Replies

New Variant Brexit

Updated on date by author

In this edition of the Daily Maul, we cover BOJONA-21 – the New Variant Brexit. It seems that the Brexit deal we did has mutated, so now we must waste more time and money trying to get a new deal after we already left. Fat chance. Read the terms and conditions.

The Maul also covers the Australian deal, an exposé into the private life of Boris Johnson and a new hardcore approach to immigrants by Priti Patel. As always, a fact and fiction checker has been prepared as it is hard to tell the difference between farce and fact with our Government.

FACT V FICTION

FACT : Australian beef is hormone injected. It can be selectively fed to children and vulnerable people as UK Government rules allow for cheap food to be dumped on schools, the NHS and care homes. Our EU membership protected us from dodgy food standards but we opted for a blue passport. Liz Truss faces a dilemma on whether she kills British farmers or British children.

FICTION : Poots is not undergoing conversion therapy but he does need to re-take CSE History and Science.

FACT : Priti Patel has had some ‘tough girl’ photographs taken so she can look tough on immigrants. At the same time Liz Truss will be agreeing to give Indians freedom of movement as part of her Brexit “fire sale”. This is all grandstandin on Patel’s part to make her look like she is respectin the will o’ the people. It’s just a photo scam.

FACT : In other news The Department of Health wanted to send 1.6 million pieces of PPE to India but the Treasury stopped them because of Rishi Sunak and Priti Patel’s overseas aid cuts. Noice

Police State

Please support our campaign to rejoin in the Amersham and Chesham by-election.

Get in touch to find out how you can help on the ground or on social media.

FACT : The new DUP leader Edwin Poots is a creationist who claims that the earth is only 6000 years old. Just when you thought that it could not get any madder than Arlene Foster …

FICTION : Boris Johnson is not full of custard. He is however full of shit.

FACT : “Sir” David Frost continues to pretend that Brexit is the fault of the EU. Frost is a serial failure as a civil servant who got lucky by suggesting that he would be a useful liar for the Government. In an astonishing move, Frost said that noboby expected Brexit to cause problems in Northern Ireland. Marina Purkiss sums it up well. Sounds a bit like the Monty Python Spanish Inquisition sketch …

If you like this article, please tip us using the Paypal button on this site or via GoFundMe

We need support to continue doing this. It takes considerable time. Thank you in advance.

Say no to the new variant Brexit – Write to your MP and the press using the facts in this article to make your case

Read our guide to Brexorcism

Join us every Monday at 8 pm to Re-Boot Britain

Posted in Australia, Borders, Boris Johnson, Brexit, Britastrophe, Economics, Europe, Politics, Sovereignty | Leave a reply