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Cross Party Alliances

Paul Bowers, our parliamentary lobbyist has produced an excellent letter to promote All-Party Parliamentary action on the EU which we may customise (attached).

We seek to target wobbling Tories as a first tranche and, of course, opposition parties.

Please go to the Google sheet and populate the sheet with details of relevant MPs and add your name if you plan to write to your MP.

Here is the letter to customise:

[Name] MP

House of Commons

London

SW1A 0AA

Dear [MP]

All-Party Parliamentary Group on European Union

I am writing as a constituent to ask you to consider setting up an All-Party Parliamentary Group on the European Union.

[I am a member of {name of activist group}]. I voted Remain in the 2016 referendum, and I have campaigned on the issue ever since.

[Insert personal connection here – In addition, my husband is Estonian; I have fond memories of studying at the Sorbonne; I once ate a croissant … ]

As you know, leaving the EU has damaged the UK’s fishing communities, threatens our farmers and food security, has cost eye-watering sums for financial services, harmed our creative industries, and forced many exporters either to scale down or to relocate. The Government’s encouragement of relocation is as much an admission of failed policy as are its plans to support retraining for farmers. Brexit has also damaged UK democracy, reduced our standing in the world, stigmatised EU nationals, and divided our country.

I believe that membership of the European Union is a necessity for the UK.

However, the response of the major political parties to the result of the 2019 general election risks creating a vicious circle of despair. Many voters wish to rejoin the EU, but feel that this is not possible because politicians are not showing leadership to that end. They feel politically homeless.

If no voice in Parliament even addresses the damage of our loss of membership, nor points out the opportunities presented by new developments within the EU, such as the growth of the green and digital sectors from the ambitious NextGenerationEU recovery and transformation plan, we will not be in a position to take advantage promptly of any opportunity to promote membership that might arise.

According to the APPG Register of 2 June 2021, there are Groups on individual European countries, on Erasmus and on Reuniting Britain Post-Brexit, but not on the EU itself.

As you may know, Article 11 of the Trade and Cooperation Agreement provides that the European Parliament and the UK Parliament may establish a Parliamentary Partnership Assembly “to exchange views on the partnership.”

In its Resolution 2021/2658(RSP) of 28 April 2021, the European Parliament endorsed this, envisaging an Assembly which would monitor implementation of the TCA, and suggesting that its remit include “the right to submit recommendations for areas where improved cooperation could be beneficial for both parties and to take joint initiatives to promote close relations.”

An APPG could support this work, and undertake a number of other roles:

  • Raising awareness of the damage caused by Brexit and the broken promises of Brexiteers
  • Channelling constituents’ views on policies that might reconcile them to EU membership
  • Creating a basis for lobbying within your own party in an effort to shift the leadership towards Rejoin
  • Representing the experiences of EU national constituents and their children
  • Providing scrutiny of the TCA, now that the Government has abolished the Commons Committee on the Future Relationship with the European Union
  • Commissioning research, providing spokespeople to the media and promoting an informed view of the EU, life outside, and the accession process
  • Providing a conduit to Parliament, through external membership, for informed activists
  • Contacting the Conference on the Future of Europe to discuss reforms that might help reconcile UK voters to a future return, and to stay in touch with new developments in the EU

I hope you will consider this suggestion positively, and speak to other Members about the possibility of creating an APPG on the EU. The longer we go on without one, the more glaring the omission, and the harder it will be for politicians to break the silence on this most vital of issues.

Yours sincerely,

[Name]

[Address]

Brexodus

Brexodus – Movement of the People … Goods … Services

In our occasional series of Brexit impact roundups, I’d like to be able to tell you that Brexit is going well. However, I cannot tell a lie, unlike Boris Johnson and the Cabinet. Here are just some of the recent impacts that are either partly or wholly attributable to Brexit via the Five F’s of Brexodus

Fish Fighters

Despite the promises made by Boris Johnson’s Government, fishing continues to be a disaster area wholly attributable to Brexodus. Livelihoods continue to be lost and the vague promises to compensate fisherman will not deal with the loss of their way of life. In Jersey, the problems continue, compounded by the fact that Jersey did not have a voice in the 2016 referendum. Furthermore, Norway is threatening not to make a post-Brexit trade deal with Britain, with fishing being a major issue in the North Atlantic, the source of our fish and chips. Turns out that Brexodus means we’ve had our chips!

Finance fleeing

Another predictable impact of Brexit was the movement of the centre of gravity in Financial Services away from London to Ireland and mainland Europe. It was reported that UK plc lost £2.3 TRILLION in derivatives trading in just ONE MONTH recently. Now it seems that many firms are relocating away from London in the wake of Brexit. The trickle down effects for service businesses in London will of course follow.

Farmers brooding

Liz Truss continues to tell lies about British farming in her bid to secure a fire sale deal with Australia that will see Britain accepting hormone fed beef. We were told this would never happen, but lying is a hardy perennial in Brexit negotiations. Even arch Brexiteer Nick Ferrari squewered Truss on LBC. Farmers will lose their livelihoods for the sake of a blue passport and our Brexodus.

Fina FAIL

Northern Ireland continues to show signs of violent uprisings. This is an entirely predictable and unacceptable outfall of Brexit.

Fcuk trading

The Office for National Statistics reported that the combined impact of Corona and Brexit shows that trade with EU countries has declined 23.1%. The report points out that Brexit problems far outweighed Corona issues in the first quarter of 2021. As stated last year Corona crisis + Brexit disaster = Britastrophe. To read more on this go to Brexit Carnage.

Meanwhile today, Dominic Cummings provides evidence to the select committee. It becomes clear that COVID was used as a cover for Brexit. It also becomes clear that there was insufficient bandwidth in Government and the Civil Service to cope with the Corona Crisis + Brexit Disaster. It’s a simple time management problem. Please retweet and build on the thread to Mr Cummins.

Download the album Britastrophe by clicking the image

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Eurovision UK Winners

Eurovision UK Winner

This song and video need no explanation. Carrie Antoinette says it all. This Cliff Richard song was announced (by me) as the Eurovision UK Winner. Polite warning : Contains testicles from ITV Good Morning – do not drink or eat whilst watching in case of choking.

Eurovision UK Winner : Carrie

Arcuri disturbed you

When she was in the neighbourhood

About Jenny, I’ve got a picture in her pants

Can you take a look?

Oh, I appreciate you’re busy

And the money’s not your own

Yeah baby, maybe it would be better

If Dom telephoned

Carrie doesn’t live here anymore (Carrie)

Carrie used to room on the second floor (On the second)

Sorry that she left no forwarding address

That was known to me

So, Carrie doesn’t live here anymore (Carrie)

You could always ask at the corner store (Could ask)

Carrie had a date with her own kind of fate

It’s plain to see

Another missing person

One of Priti’s we assume

My chicks wear their freedom

Like cheap perfume

(It’s useless information)

Returning my call

(To help the situation)

They’ve nothing at all

(She’s just another conquest)

For the Bojo balls

Carrie doesn’t live here anymore (Carrie)

Carrie used to room on the second floor (On the second)

Sorry that she left no forwarding address

That was known to me, Carrie

Carrie doesn’t live here anymore (Carrie doesn’t live, doesn’t live here anymore)

Carrie used to room on the second floor (On the second)

Sorry, Carrie left no forwarding address

It’s a mystery

New Variant Brexit

In this edition of the Daily Maul, we cover BOJONA-21 – the New Variant Brexit. It seems that the Brexit deal we did has mutated, so now we must waste more time and money trying to get a new deal after we already left. Fat chance. Read the terms and conditions.

The Maul also covers the Australian deal, an exposé into the private life of Boris Johnson and a new hardcore approach to immigrants by Priti Patel. As always, a fact and fiction checker has been prepared as it is hard to tell the difference between farce and fact with our Government.

FACT V FICTION

FACT : Australian beef is hormone injected. It can be selectively fed to children and vulnerable people as UK Government rules allow for cheap food to be dumped on schools, the NHS and care homes. Our EU membership protected us from dodgy food standards but we opted for a blue passport. Liz Truss faces a dilemma on whether she kills British farmers or British children.

FICTION : Poots is not undergoing conversion therapy but he does need to re-take CSE History and Science.

FACT : Priti Patel has had some ‘tough girl’ photographs taken so she can look tough on immigrants. At the same time Liz Truss will be agreeing to give Indians freedom of movement as part of her Brexit “fire sale”. This is all grandstandin on Patel’s part to make her look like she is respectin the will o’ the people. It’s just a photo scam.

FACT : In other news The Department of Health wanted to send 1.6 million pieces of PPE to India but the Treasury stopped them because of Rishi Sunak and Priti Patel’s overseas aid cuts. Noice

Police State

Please support our campaign to rejoin in the Amersham and Chesham by-election.

Get in touch to find out how you can help on the ground or on social media.

FACT : The new DUP leader Edwin Poots is a creationist who claims that the earth is only 6000 years old. Just when you thought that it could not get any madder than Arlene Foster …

FICTION : Boris Johnson is not full of custard. He is however full of shit.

FACT : “Sir” David Frost continues to pretend that Brexit is the fault of the EU. Frost is a serial failure as a civil servant who got lucky by suggesting that he would be a useful liar for the Government. In an astonishing move, Frost said that noboby expected Brexit to cause problems in Northern Ireland. Marina Purkiss sums it up well. Sounds a bit like the Monty Python Spanish Inquisition sketch …

If you like this article, please tip us using the Paypal button on this site or via GoFundMe

We need support to continue doing this. It takes considerable time. Thank you in advance.

Say no to the new variant Brexit – Write to your MP and the press using the facts in this article to make your case

Read our guide to Brexorcism

Join us every Monday at 8 pm to Re-Boot Britain

Railway Modeller

Trains and Goats and Planes

In our occasional series of Brexit satire we offer you Railway Modeller and The Northern Farmer. Plus a fact checker to help you tell Brexit facts from fiction.

Railway Modeller
Trains and Goats and Planes

FACT and FICTION checker

FICTION : AC DC’s Angus Young does not have a signature hormone fed steak pie. He has a signature Gibson SG.

FACT : Australian beef is hormone injected. It can be selectively fed to children and vulnerable people as UK Government rules allow for cheap food to be dumped on schools, the NHS and care homes. Our EU membership protected us from dodgy food standards but we opted for a blue passport.

FACT : Liz Truss has NOT struck a great trade deal with Japan. Japan benefits five times more than we do. Our desperation to get Brexit done makes us an easy target for “fire sale” type trade deals. Truss wants to claim success by striking a deal with Australia. We will pay for this dearly. Free trade in 15 years time will decimate the economies of Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland and parts of England.

FICTION : Boris Johnson is not a train enthusiast. Allegedly he paints cardboard buses.

FACT : The rebrand of Great British Railways is an expensive distraction. See Grant Schapps’ ludicrous flag shagging video filmed with emotional music at the National Railway Museum in York, shortly to be renamed the Great British Brexit Museum.

FICTION : Mallard is not being put back into service, nor The Rocket to power HS2.

FACT : The Australian trade deal will spell a sharp decline in farming in Wales, Scotland and Northern Ireland.

FICTION : Ringo Starr is not stuck in the tunnel from Scotland to Northern Ireland. The tunnel is a work of fiction rather like Brexit.

FICTION : Jennifer Arcuri is not a farmer. She is about to release a TV drama in which she describes her sex life with Johnson : “We read sonnets to each other, then he rolled onto me like a binbag full of custard, gasping like an asthmatic octogenerian, as he reached his climax & I wondered if he’d got it in yet”.

If you like this, please give us a tip by contributing using the Paypal button on this site or via GoFundMe We need support to continue doing this. It takes considerable time. Thank you in advance.