Category: Angela Rayner

Lecternology

Updated on

16/04/2024 by author

Not only have we had five Prime Ministers since Brexit, we have also had five lecterns. Each of them have a different character, like each PM and each has cost the taxpayer more than Angela Rayner’s alleged tax scam. Liz Truss’ Jenga lectern cost an uncool £4175, seemingly appropriate, as, no doubt it could be rebuilt into something else 49 days later … In this article we look at the emerging “academic discipline” of lecternology inspired by Peter Hurst and Peter Stefanovic.

Cameron

Cameron’s lectern was designed by his head of operations to appear “statesmanlike”. Cameron was the youngest PM and, as such, the wood for his lectern was sourced from B&Q, using freshly cut pine with a curved, flared column, signifying agility and smoothness, and a glossy finish to signify superficiality. Read more on Cameron at Cameron.

May

The simple religious cross style of Theresa’s oak lectern symbolises her victimhood as the Prime Minister who felt a sense of duty to serve but who ultimately would be hoist by her own inner conflict. In the end, the ERG and Remainers placed her on a cross for sacrifice in favour of someone more malleable. That person would be the fatberg formerly known as Boris Johnson.

Johnson

Johnson’s lectern column and base are the thickest of the five, matching the intelligence and heft of the incumbent. “The Johnson” as it was referred to in No 10 was constructed of teak for strength, as it doubled as a shagging plinth for internal use. It is believed that Carrie’s children were conceived on “The Johnson” along with other random offspring from the Brexit staffers during Partygate.

Truss

The Truss lectern is perhaps the most interesting in so far that it is constructed using Jenga. This would enable quick breakdown and reassembly after her 49 days tenure. We have an authentic woodchip replica of The Truss ceremonial lectern available on e-bay for the bargain price of £30 000. This would enable us to stand a lettuce for election in her South West Norfolk constituency. Tony Hanlon commented on the spiral construction “Its a treasured memory of her death spiralling of the economy”.

Truss has since blamed the failure of her Brexonomics budget on the infiltration of left-wing Norwegian wood into her lectern at a cost of £70 billion to the taxpayer and the ruination of young people’s hopes of home ownership. John Lennon, Kate Bush, Chris Witty and Angela Rayner have been blamed by The Truss, along with left wing lawyers, left wing carpenters, carping judges, civil servants, punk rockers, classicists, MDF, lettuce, homosexuals, trannies, the blob, layabouts, drug users, climate protesters, smoking bans, Potter Heigham, Brundall, The A47, The Bank of England, The OBR, UN, The Queen, charities, do-gooders, poets, artists, piss artists, vegans, Christians, Moslems, London, wood carvers, carvery owners, wood workers, sex workers, sex swappers, The Lib Dems, brie, gorgonzola, camembert, left wing cheese, real ale drinkers, real world thinkers, Remoaners, men, women, children, animals, plants, left wing micro-organisms, algae, fungi, Liz’s parents and all members of the deep state who sought to bring her down. The Jenga lectern proved to be her downfall and it was nothing to do with her incompetence, social ineptitude and the triumph of confidence over competence. That is a disgrace. In Liz’s own words “Liz Truss is best ignored”.

Click on the description to buy The Truss on e-bay.

Sunakered

The Sunak lectern is paradoxical. It is bigger than the other lecterns although Sunak is possibly the shortest Prime Minister in history. The upright section is designed to obscure both of Rishi’s legs for reasons of modesty and as support in case he were to break one. Just like its user, the Sunak lectern has no integrity, professionalism or accountability, being made from offcuts from the “previous administration”.

All of the above are, of course, pathetic attempts to look in control by people who are easily persuaded by presentation over content.

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Posted in Angela Rayner, Boris Johnson, Brexit, Brexorcism, Britain, Britastrophe, Economics, Elections, Europe, Leadership, Liz Truss, Partygate, Rejoin EU, Sovereignty, Sunak, Theresa May, Tories | Tagged Brexit, Britain, Conservatives, Lecterns, Rejoin EU | 4 Replies

Red Brexit, Blue Brexit

Updated on

18/09/2023 by author

Peter Cook

No doubt this will make me unpopular, but I cannot and will not vote for a Labour party who wish to maintain the illusion that Brexit can be made to work as Keir Starmer declared yesterday. By turning their backs on the greatest socio-economic, political, legal, ethical and environmental catastrophe of our age Labour are mortgaging our children’s futures, the very opposite of what Keir Starmer claims he wants:

From The Guardian – click the extract to read the article.

My Labour chums tell me “shh, Keir has a secret plan to rejoin in 2032“. I’m sorry, but this lacks any sense of pragmatism for three major reasons:

1. By 2032, nobody will know what Brexit was. Micro Pay as EU go deals by Sunak et al will mean that the number of people caring about Brexit will get smaller and smaller. The end losers will be 68 million people without rights to live and work in the EU.

2. The economic and social damage to UK will be deep and mostly irreversible like an irreversible chemical reaction. For example, the bleed of financial services away from UK. The final destruction of the UK car industry. Fishing. Farming. Scotland and Northern Ireland’s departure from UK. and so on.

3. Our divergence from EU standards will be so great as to make it much more difficult to join anew.

Other optimistic Labour colleagues tell me that “Keir is simply saying what people want to hear. Once he gets into power he will change his mind“. They cannot explain how the Mail, Express and Sun will not eat him for breakfast for being no better than Boris Johnson as a liar. None can explain the difference between a red and blue Brexit.

Starmer’s proposal appears to be based on a fear of facing down a few red wall racists and maybe some of the remaining hard left in his party. He ignores the vast majority of his membership and of course 63% of the nation who say that Brexit has Failed. This is a morally and pragmatically bankrupt position and must not be rewarded by voting Labour in a General Election.

Labour ignores its membership. Click image to compare.

Granted, the Tories are awful, but one cannot put a cigarette paper between Starmer’s position on Brexit and Sunak’s. Politics is so often the choice between the lesser of two evils rather than something aspirational and pragmatic. This is why I shall be supporting Gina Miller’s True and Fair party and hoping that we reach a hung parliament, given that the Tories have already destroyed themselves. A hung Parliament with a rainbow coalition offers the best chance to end the Brexit nightmare and all of its products as represented by our Brexit iceberg:

The Brexit Iceberg. Keir Starmer says that he wishes to work on root causes. All of the issues and more above the water line have their roots partially or wholly in Brexit.

Write to your Labour MP or prospective candidate with this article. You may also wish to mention the Bylines piece Hard Labour and anything else you can muster. Demand a EU turn on Starmer’s position in exchange for your vote.

Help us make a stand in the Mid Beds by-election by giving Gina Miller’s True and Fair party a decent share of the vote. It’s only a by-election and it will make Labour (and the Lib Dems) think really hard about their position on Brexit. We need help on the ground with canvassing and social media amplification.

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The Disney Longstocking prison ship — Although the Tories are truly awful, it does not do to preserve the binary tryst that delivered Brexit.

Posted in Angela Rayner, Brexit, Brexorcism, Britain, Britastrophe, Keir Starmer, Labour, Leadership, Liz Truss, Northern Ireland, Politics, Populism, Rejoin EU, Scotland, Sunak | Tagged Brexit, Britain, Britastrophe, Labour | 10 Replies

Angela Rayner

Updated on

11/07/2023 by author

Peter Cook

I like Angela Rayner. As some who started life in a council house, who pulled myself up by my bootstraps, with a wife from Manchester, I identify with Angela’s straight talk on many things. I was therefore even more dismayed to hear her spinning myths and lies on LBC this week about Brexit. Angela came up with many of the Brexiteer arguments in this interview. Here are some of her ‘whoppers’.

The will of the people must be respected

Horseshit. We are fast approaching the point where 70% of people in Britain believe that Brexit has failed. Angela does not understand that democracy is NOT a project. It is a process. She would not even be an MP if democracy were a project as women would not have a vote or be able to participate in society. We would be more like Saudi Arabia under Angela’s view of democracy.

We can’t just rejoin

Bollocks. Whilst it’s true that all takes time, the only thing preventing us from starting the process is a backbone in politics. Read our article on the matter at Byline Times.

I met with four Labour Councillors campaigning in my area on Sunday. All said they fundamentally disagreed with the exec. Are they prepared to do anything about it? Of course not. We need ‘different’ and not more of the same. In contrast, Gina Miller leads the only party in Britain who unequivocally favour rejoining the EU. It is possible and need take no longer than 3 years.

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We can’t rejoin on the same terms

This was perhaps Angela’s cleverest deception. By not being specific, she allowed people to fill in the dots by themselves … for example “oh we’ll lose the pound, Shengen, pints”, and many other myths put forward by the Brexiteers. These feed the Labour project fear narrative and Angela should really know better.

It is true that Old Albion will need to learn some appropriate humility as part of the joining process, instead of the English exceptionalism which characterised the Brexit vote. However, it is unwise to place more constraints in the way of success than is necessary before negotiations begin. When I reflect on the conversation I observed with Barnier, I know that rejoining is possible. Yes, it will be difficult and everything will be on the table. If Britain decided that it must keep the pound for example, I’m sure it would be considered. Since all is a trade, the EU may come with some other things we may have to move on to keep the pound, perhaps in the finance domain. For example, we have just seen concessions on Northern Ireland traded with changes to the Erasmus scheme. Nonetheless, what we must do is establish the principle of rejoining and political will to do so. Once that is secured, we must then leave the negotiators to do the work, as we did in the Brexit negotiations.