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Monthly Archives: January 2021

Anus Horribilis

No, it’s not a mis-spelt article title. Anus Horribilis refers to the toxic combination of Brexshit and Corona aka a Britastrophe. In this yearly roundup I’m picking out some of the lowlights of 2020 and some of the early indicators of the Britastrophe to come. But of course, firstly, let me wish you happy new year via some music:

Project Fear v Project Fact

Gibraltar struck their own arrangements with the EU on 30.12.20 and British residents gained the ability to live and work in Spain and 27 EU countries by adopting Schengen. In the longer term this may lead to the re-integration of Gibraltar into Spain. Brexiteers said it would never happen …

Northern Ireland has similar privileges, now that Johnson dropped his “dead body promise” that there would NEVER be a border in the Irish sea. Included in the arrangements are the continuation of the EHIC healthcare scheme and the Erasmus scheme for young people to study in Europe.

Write to your MP. Demand a level playing field on free movement, Erasmus and EHIC cards. There must be unity of rights and freedoms.

Just yesterday it was revealed that another lorry park is to be built around the White Cliffs of Dover to cope with delays caused by Brexit. Michael Gove promised frictionless borders. Stockpiling means that borders are currently less busy but just reflect on these mind boggling facts:

More than 220 million customs forms will have to be processed by about 5,000 Customs officers for freight transport in the New Year. These apply to anything over 7.5 tonnes, laden or not. You’ll need a Kent (Road) Access Permit (KRAP) which lasts 24 hours, every time you come in, for a start. Some British exporters are to temporarily delay sending goods to Europe for a couple of weeks because they won’t subject their drivers to the delays.

Read this shocking account of lorry drivers trapped in Kent for days by Kent Police under direction from Priti Patel and our Brexit Government. Anus Horribilis has only just begun.

Treated like animals to feed the Brexiteers red meat and silence opposition to Brexit

COVIDIOTS

In an act of wilful madness, Johnson has changed the regime of COVID vaccinations so that people get a sub-optimal single dose with a possible follow up some 12 weeks later. The worst case scenario from this is that we will have millions of under-protected people wandering around thinking they are invincible. At the same time, the Government plan to mix and match vaccines from different manufacturers when there is no clinical evidence to suggest this is safe. The Government blamed the suppliers for failing to supply sufficient vaccine. Pfizer have just denied this is the case.

Write to your MP. Demand that COVID vaccines be given according to the recommended dosing regime.

BOJONA-21 is here – a psychotropic drug that makes it impossible for people to tell truth from lies. It’s very catchy so watch out. It is transmitted through contact with The Sun, Daily Mail and The Express.

Brexorcism

Brexiteers have had a sudden and dramatic change of heart. From 2016-2020 they cried “Remoaners! Traitors! Saboteurs! Enemies of the people!!!” In a dramatic reversal they are now saying: “It’s time to put aside our differences and move forward together…”

I for one am not prepared to collaborate with people who wilfully voted to ruin my children’s futures and have not demonstrated any atonement or behavioural change. Here is a video of someone who sent a death threat to my family and was later on caught in the act using spray paints and a knife to attack my property:

I will never “move on” and faced a huge dose of hatred from hardline Brexiteers over this tweet. Why are they so angry? They won FFS.

Thanks to Leon Berger and Charlie Rome for their inputs to this.

Happy new year

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Anus Horribilis
A town called Malice
Anus Horribilis
Anus Horribilis – Theresa May dies not seem so bad these days
Taking Back Control of our Laws

Take Back Control of our Laws

Write to your MP, asking them to Take Back Control of our Laws, now that Brexit is done. A couple of example letters for you to base your letter on are included below. The sample letters range from the sublime to the ridiculous. Pick your style and get writing. Let’s hold our MPs to account for the Brexit illusions from 2016 now that we can expect the sunlit uplands to appear. Your MP’s email is of the form firstname.lastname.mp@parliament.uk

Dear xxx,

I write to ask for the £350 million every week for the NHS, now that you have got Brexit done. Please can you provide a discounted cash flow statement for these inputs, set against the £200 BILLION or so of costs accrued so far on Brexit. Can you also provide an account of all the contracts issued to companies who failed to deliver PPE, test and trace and so on so I can calculate the impact on my tax bill.

All the best

*********************

Dear xxx,

Now that you have got Brexit done, I write to ask you to help rid the UK of those EU laws which were holding us back. In particular I ask that you attend to the pressing matter of upgrading the lightbulbs in my street lamps. They offer no illumination and were installed by my council, following pressure from residents to restore the street to Edwardian times. As well as this, they have been forced to introduce the ritual of regular bear-bating sessions and the infection of local people with syphilis and typhoid. I understand from the Council that they were forced, yes forced, to have these practices, because of EU laws imposed upon our once great nation.

Please also table a motion in Parliament to insist that all bananas conform to a maximum angle of curvature of 7 degrees. I chose the number 7 for no reason other than it is a prime number.

Whilst you are doing this, I have a number of annoying migrating birds in my garden. Many are of European origin. I have invented a unique device that traps the foreign ones and then deprives them of food until they are no more. I have shown my design patent to Priti Patel. Would you like to see it? (under confidential disclosure of course). I am presently designing an upgraded model that strangles the birds whilst playing Ode to Joy, in the hope that the word will get back to Brussels that we don’t want their stupid Beethoven music. After all, we have Robbie Williams.

Let’s Take Back Control of our Laws.

I await your reply.

Keep up the good work.

Peter Cook

******************

Dear xxx.

Brexit is done ! Thats the battle, crying on the street. Now we can take bak control of our money, boarders and laws. I write to ask. you to deal with this pressing matter,

There is a man called Tomek in my town. We call him Tommy and he likes it, But he doesnt speak propper English. When I speak with him he OFTEN gets things WRONG. It annoys my wife and my friend Brad in the pub where we have illegal lockdown boozing sessions. Please have Tommy arrested and sent to the Ascension Islands to learn. I know he run’s the only super-market in town, but we were fine before Tommy came here. so we will be grate agin.

We must take bak controll of are shops. Do it today and. show these forins hat we can grow are own.

Cheers matey

Graeme

*****************

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Take Back Control of our Laws

Scotland The Brave

I am not Scottish but I support Scotland the Brave. Let me explain why. In 2014 I understood the problem of being 500 miles away from Westminster and being ignored, from conversations with Scottish friends. I used to point out that one did not need to be that far away to be ignored. Just 15 or 50 miles from Westminster was quite enough to be ignored. The problem is in essence Westminster and our English exceptionalism. I was also of the view that fragmentation of countries was a bad idea as it made our differences more important than our similarities.

My view changed in 2016 after the Brexit referendum. Scotland did not vote for self harm by a large margin. Although I’m sad to see them go, I now fully support Scottish independence and their return to the European Union. Scotland has one huge advantage going forward. It would be much more united in its purpose and that would produce the necessary cohesion to build an independent nation.

We are presently working to Re-Boot Britain. Amongst our number we have several people in England who wish to promote an independent Scotland. They plan to do this via campaigning to eject Conservatives and other parties in Scotland, or even standing SNP candidates in local English elections.

My apologies to my Scottish friends. We are not all complete arseholes.

Please sign up for my lifelong friend Eric’s blog naebother:

My Dad’s dream was to return to an independent Scotland whose main export was not talented people, he died waiting.

Scotland the Brave

Join our next event Wed 6 at 8.00 pm GMT via ZOOM

Please sign the petition

This week marks the end of our membership of the European Single Market and Customs Union. On 1 January, each and every Scot, including our children, will lose the right to live, travel and work freely in 31 other European countries.  Covid Level 4 restrictions mean that we are not able to protest in the streets as we would have liked. But throughout Scotland we will be protesting in large numbers: in our homes, in open spaces, on social media, against this attack on our futures and those of our children. We call on as many as possible to share pictures of themselves displaying the EU stars – a symbol of European unity – in some form, accompanied by the hashtag #WeWillBeBack.

As we prepare for this sad day, we in the European Movement in Scotland are united in this pledge:

“We declare that Scotland is a European country, embracing our common values of peace, democracy, human rights, equality, sustainability and solidarity.

The clear wish of the great majority of the Scottish people is that Scotland should be within the European Union.

We commit to working to bring this about, whatever Scotland’s constitutional status”.

Scotland The Brave

We end with one of my favourite songs, featuring Stuart Adamson R.I.P. My friend Bill Nelson wrote a beautiful piece of music for Stuart’s funeral at Barrowlands.

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Enjoy our other articles:

Anus Horribilis – 2020 reviewed

Looking after No 1 – Self interest and Boris Johnson

Gutterpress – Our Satirical send ups of populist rags

Priti Patel

The mysterious case of Priti Patel

Reaching a deal with the EU and Boris Johnson’s request to Leavers and Remainers to “move on” did not inhibit his Lying Machine from continuing full blast during the festive period. On Christmas Day, Priti Patel gave us her Christmas message, saying that after Brexit we would all be safer. This lie was unmasked by Sir Ian Blair, former Metropolitan Police commissioner in an interview on Radio 4 on 4 January 2021.

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Sir Ian emphasised the loss of the European Arrest Warrant and of a major EU database which had been accessed more than 500 million times a year by British police.

“We’ve lost powers.”

“We lost full access to Europe-wide, real-time, interrogatable databases on criminal records, DNA, fingerprints, criminal intelligence.”

He added that the police had  been emphasising for some time that this would make us less safe. So what did Ms Patel mean in her claim that the nation would be safer after exiting the EU? 

Apparently Patel was referring to “even tougher powers”, to be given to the police and security agencies.

However, Patel could have introduced these powers if we had stayed in the EU!

The EU cannot intervene in policing and enforcement of criminal law by Member States. 

The EU’s activities are limited to providing services through voluntary co-operation which are beyond the capacity of member states acting individually.  This is a good example of how the extremist Brexiteer leadership tries to persuade us that leaving the EU benefits us, through lies, bullying and fake news.  This is The mysterious case of Priti Patel indeed. If you are persuaded by the notion that bullies are unaware of their actions, think again about bullying back better.

We will continue to expose them so that their disgraceful record remains fresh in the public mind.

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Priti Woman – PG rated by You Tube but fine by us
The Hunger Games

The Hunger Games

Outside my life on here, I am a business person so, of course, I’m keen to harvest the benefits of Brexit. I’m impatient to discover what they are, as I have been promised a bright future over many years. First I decided to assess the cost-benefits of our new found sovereignty.

SOVRINTY INNIT

I discovered that Britain always had our sovereignty. This was demonstrated in the Supreme Court by Gina Miller. It was actually stated in the Brexit Withdrawal Agreement. How else were we able to close our borders for COVID in 2020 without asking the EU? We have kept the Pound. We turned down Billions of Euros of EU assistance for the Corona crisis. Now we even have our own “British sovereign variant” of Corona, according to Boris Johnson. But I am told by Boris Johnson that 67 million of us each now own a great big bag of sovereignty. To assess the value, I have put my bag up for auction on e-bay for £10 000.

Bags ‘o sovrinty – PRICELESS

Sadly, no one has taken up the offer of the bag. I am prepared to take one penny. Does nobody place any value on it? Will it buy a lunch box for a hungry child?

The Hunger Games

Meanwhile, the real Hunger Games are just beginning. In Northern Ireland, supermarket shelves are emptying, as it becomes apparent that frictionless trade was yet another Brexit unicorn sold by serial liar Michael Gove. In schools, our Government has been so possessed by Brexit that it is unable to organise itself to feed children under lockdown.

Perhaps Jacob Rees-Mogg was on the money when he said that he was not troubled by a few smugglers after Brexit. Here is the Brexit Smuggler’s Song after Rudyard Kipling.

Brexit Priorities

Finally, here is a wonderful poem by Barry Fentiman-Hall called “When Brexit comes (you will not be prioritised)”

When Brexit comes
You will not be prioritised

White is not the original canvas
On which the world was colourized
Jim Davidson will not make a comeback
Chalky was not really his friend
You are not the beginning of anything
Nor the default setting
You will queue for cabbages
With a pantone nation

When Brexit comes
You will not be prioritised

God is not an Englishman
You are not his messenger
Sent to wash the world in shocking pink
Dunkirk was a defeat
A flotilla of weekend pleasure boats
Are not coming to save you
And neither is Sir John Mills with a cold Danish beer
There are no exceptions
You will be on universal credit
With Jakub, Karosh, and Li Cheng

When Brexit comes
You will not be prioritised

How you voted is irrelevant
Maggie and Winston are dead racists and their statues will be pissed on by poodles and shat on by doves
Theresa May will never be any more of a statue than she is now
Conservatism is not a natural state
It does not appear
In the periodic table of elements
The calcium in your bones
Will be at the same levels as your anarchist neighbour

When Brexit comes you will not be prioritised

We are finally all in it together
You and I

There will be no further extension
Brexit will come
It will be televised live from your living room…
And you will be the star…

Ending Brexit populism is our priority and those that continue to push it. Join us tonight at 8 pm on ZOOM.