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Category: Corruption

Farage v Cats

Operation Brexit

Don Adamson reports from the Brexit Bunker in Barnsley.

One – There is a nasty war happening in Western Congo that involves Rwanda. Is this what the Tories mean when they say that Rwanda is a safe place? 

Two – There has been a strike in Hollywood caused by Artificial Intelligence being used to write scripts and to replace actors. In the Novel ‘1984’ George Orwell predicted a future where pornography would be written by robots. Did Orwell write ‘1984’ as a dire warning or as a training manual for dubious politicians and robber baron capitalists?

Three – In Britain we get a tiny fraction of the refugees and asylum seekers that go to other countries. Why do we get so hot and bothered by such a non problem?

Brexit Migration Algorithm
Brexit Migration Algorithm

Four – Discuss the following statement – Ordure is a biological necessity. Gammons are an expensive disaster.

Five – This New Year is different. We have two honours’ list instead of just one. In addition to the standard list we have Thick Lizzie’s resignation honours. I have heard of rewarding failure but that is ridiculous. Neither list refers to the knighthood that Nigel Garbage craves nor his bootlickers demand. There is a persistent rumour that there is some deep dark secret in Nigel Garbage’s past that renders him unfit for an honour. That is incredible. These Tories have scattered medals and other decorations on the most utterly deplorable people. What on each did Nigel Garbage do that disqualifies him from receiving some kind of decoration from these Tories – cannibalism? Human sacrifice? 

Six – Discuss the following statement. It is a pretty state of affairs when our best hope is to vote Labour in the expectation that Keith Starmer is telling lies about Rejoin.

Seven – Is there any truth in the rumour that Kim Il Sung of North Korea refused the peerage that Johnson offered him? They say that even Kim has some standard.

Eight – Netanyahu is furious because the Israeli Supreme Court is making efforts to obstruct illegality by Netanyahu’s thugs. Do you think there will ever be lawyers in Britain with the brains, courage and decency to obstruct illegality by Richy Scumbag and his criminals? 

Nine – Rupert Murdoch assures us that Brexit is a supercalifragilisticexpialidocious success. Everybody in this country is rejoicing in the sunlit uplands that we all expected. Why then do the heroes of Brexit, notably Nigel Garbage, go everywhere accompanied by Thuggish minders when it simply cannot be possible that the heroes of Brexit have anything to fear? 

Read Tectonic Plates

… that BBC would get an independent chair … Samir Shah looks unlikely to impress … what a creep Samir was … he was a goon … 

… riddled with foreign ownership  … Telegraph and Spectator back in hands of Barclay family … debt to Lloyds bank paid by US investment fund … bank is happy … nobody else … financed by Abu Dhabi … given assurances  there will be no interference … government and press unconvinced … journalists in open revolt … nice to have a British owner … Brits with huge amounts to squander on dying industry thin on the ground … Press ownership in serious need of scrutiny … never happen under Tories … unlikely under Labour … remember all those assurances when Murdoch bought Times? … Telegraph has form on suppressing news … UAE involvement will pollute media … threaten society and freedom of expression … News Group … hacking and illegal information gathering … aim was to interfere with business of government … spying on ministers for commercial gain … knowingly repeating lies … unacceptable … yet stock in trade in Murdoch companies … 

Government’s migration plans … cruel mess that will harm British business… 

… unflushable turd of British politics … no talents except self publicity and exacerbating ethnic tensions … 

Farage Garage
Farage’s Garage on the M20.

… Michael Gove did insist that all procurement decisions went through a ‘painstaking process by teams of civil servants’ … that is not how the Commons public accounts committee saw it … ‘perhaps the most shameful episode in government response to pandemic … splurged huge amounts of money … obscenely inflated prices … chaotic .. Chucked out even the most cursory due diligence’… 

… Nadine Dorries has been plugging her memoir ‘The Plot’ … critics have dubbed it ‘Lost the Plot’ … tawdry world of Westminster power broking … factual errors … errors of interpretation … omissions that undermine the credibility of the main thesis … eye poppingly extraordinary book … fails to ring true … by repeatedly adding two and two and getting 666 Dorries reinforces every paranoid fantasy … surreal document … tired regime fading away like the gas released by a dead body …

… Southbank part of the Agora Group … targeted by US regulators … prey on consumers … misleading deceptive claims … fake miracle cures … get rich quick schemes … Garbage backed Bitcoin as an investment … it was then $18,000 … later hit a record $64,000 then nosedived … they are coming for your money … certainly true of Nigel Garbage’s friends at Southbank Investment …

… the absence of chaos seems like competence … the unthinkable seems acceptable … A PM should not be a relief because he did not blow up the financial markets in a month… not normal for a British government to suspend human rights legislation, ignore international law … Britain needs stability … neither Tories nor Richy Scumbag can deliver it … Rwanda policy is impractical and unprincipled … Britain has paid Rwanda £240M without sending a single migrant to Rwanda … scheme is unusually mean … unsafe, shameful … a sensible PM in a sensible party would long ago have retreated on Rwanda …  Scumbag has a technocratic manner that disguises two truths … he has a weakness for silly ideas, true believer in Brexit, was a supporter of Johnson … fond of gimmicks … second truth is that he is not very good at politics … set himself up as an agent of  change but brought back David Cameron … pointless row with the Greeks over the Elgin Marbles … sacked a Home Secretary he should never have appointed … Rwanda started out as a whim … Scumbag turned it into a totem … opposition to the European Court of Human Rights has become a test of purity … even though Russia was the last to leave … Scumbag is using a deeply flawed bill to force through a bad policy … giving the Labour Party an easier ride than it deserves  … humiliation for Scumbag … different set of Tory values … authoritarian … disdain for checks and balances … Whimsy became policy … concern from officials overruled … evidence of deterrent effect uncertain … factionalism, self absorbed back benchers  and enormous payments to foreign governments ….  Careerists sense opportunity in rallying to the right … hope of getting flights airborne forlorn … magical thinking … not grounded in reality … reads like a line from a fairy tale … means nothing good…

… easy for Keith Starmer to forge close links with Brussels … 8 out 10 Labour voters want to Rejoin … Britain has been chaotic for ten years… yet to have an agenda … Labour putting a lot of effort into looking ready for government … increasing doubts … is it real substance or just spin … many in the party feel Labour has no real idea  of what it will actually do … Starmer needs a battle plan … best response to Starmer’s ‘clever stance’ on Brexit … we are asked to vote for somebody saying the opposite of what we believe based on the assumption that this person is lying … horrific state for politics to be in …

Read Scottish Bylines

… accused the government of legislation so divorced from reality that it might as well claim dogs are cats … belief that saying something instantly makes it a fact is a dangerous tendency … seems to be a common affliction in politicians … looks like an attempt to hoodwink the public … this government’s appalling record of telling whoppers…. would reduce the Advertising Standards Authority to apoplexy … ministers hope the public will not notice …  we are told the Rwanda scheme is worth the escalating millions of pounds … Scumbag has cast a shadow over his integrity … Brexit has seen the politicians peddling the greatest fairy stories … all a mirage … fairytale ..

… remains Richy Scumbag’s obsession … dreadful strategy … by any means necessary … ludicrous …  disgrace … Tories know full well … it is performative cruelty and a flagrant betrayal of the Tory Party’s ancestral commitment to the rule of law … Scumbag’s appeared at Atreju Festival in Rome – Glastonbury of the international hard right …  For a Tory once described as a centre ground technocrat … Scumbag has cultivated a taste for the hard right … Britain is in terrible shape … yet nothing seems more important than ‘stopping the boats’ … the true Brexit dividend : an exhausted, morally bankrupt government that is … fight for survival with a populist gimmick that is ethically repugnant, pointlessly costly and almost certain to fail in the courts … restorative nostalgia for  monoculture Britain that never truly existed … 

Don Adamson Pip Pip             Medway Delta (Retired)                       Brexorcist and Saboteur First Class

Career opportunities

I stumbled over a job for Medway Council as a Political Assistant to the Conservative Group. The role requires an allegiance to the Tory party but is paid for by taxpayers money. I cannot understand how this can be legal. It’s an outrage. Anyway I made an application. Here are the job basics in blue and my personal statement in purple. What are my chances?

Job Spec

The Conservative Group are looking to recruit a highly motivated individual with exceptional political and communication skills to support its work. You will assist with political issues, suggest potential courses of action and provide evaluation, information and research services as required. You will proactively research policy, liaise with the media, prepare speeches and brief members.

You will need acute political judgement, be able to establish positive working relationships with members and officers, have excellent communication skills and be able to assimilate and analyse information quickly, spotting critical political issues and managing time effectively to ensure deadlines are met. The need to be sympathetic to the aims of the Conservative Party will be essential.

My personal statement

I am committed to Tory fascism and its practical applications in Medway. This makes me ideal for the position. Here are some specific behaviours and projects I would be willing to oversee:
Very happy to watch asylum seekers drown whilst fleeing from terror if it pleases my MP.
I will assist the sitting Tories to recreate Dead Man’s island as an asylum centre.
Delighted to see the rise of food banks in Medway. Lee Anderson is right when he says that people can cook a meal for 30p. Dust is plentiful in the towns and inexpensive.
I think Boris is a good laugh and probably plays a good game of darts. If required I will meet him in the Cooper’s Arms to talk about Winston Churchill, the Dambusters and the failure of Medway to ingratiate itself by becoming a city.

I can spend money without moral justification or a business case. Whilst I’m not up to the Liz Truss, Dido Harding or Boris Johnson nuclear levels of spaffing, I will learn at the feet of the masters in the council. I approved of the utter waste of money for the Japanese roundabout and the Tori.

We will commission a bird clearance society on the Cliffe Peninsula. Birds serve no useful function for the Tories and the removal of the birds will pave the way for Cliffefell – a high rise development on the marshes, built to new Brexit fire standards.
I’m able to come up with meaningless three word chants to distract the masses from anything that might be important.
I would help to see Suella Braverman as the head of social services in Medway and the installation of prison hulks on Rochester Riverside and Chatham Dockside.

I am joining the Masons. You may say it’s too late, but I have ordered an apron on e-bay.

Civil servants are a blight on society. I would ensure that the council workers are publicly humiliated and flogged at the Dockyard for their woke dress sense and other aspects of their scummy hand to mouth existence on a daily basis. This would also serve as a visitor attraction and bring more revenue to the Council.

I have many bags of sovrinty in my loft and will use them to inflate the aspirations of the prevailing Tory MPs who are not so ashamed of themselves that they will still stand for election in 2024.

I once drowned a puppy and felt no emotion. I saw that as a turning point in my emotional resilience, taking my inspiration from Robert Jenrick, Priti Patel and Suella Braverman.

I am not afraid to call Vince Maple and Keith Starmer out for copying us on Brexit. They have no ideas of their own.

Kelly Tolhust is a proper hardcore woman. She’s a dude innit. We should use her to do some cage fighting with the woke Labour Councillors. We should fight them with the biatches. The Green party in Medway are terrified of her and we can organise some Just Stop Oil type people to fight with them as they eat their vegan sandwiches.
We can transform the Dickens’ Festival into an all year round reality event with guidance from the Minister for the 18th Century, Jacob Rees-Mogg. With forced child labour camps in Luton Road, bear-bating in Lordswood and a Scurvy Centre replacing Gillingham Library. Disease keeps the proles occupied and I will ask Rodney Chambers to commission a campaign of releasing rats into lower Gillingham.

I am skilled in painting and decorating and stand ready to paint over any cheery artworks in child care centres and infant schools.
We could turn the Medway Tunnel into a giant refugee concentration centre. If anyone escapes they would find themselves on the Medway City Estate, itself a wasteland. Fun Drum could also be used to contain the immigrant scum.
If needed. I have some Nat C cosplay suits for party conferences and other Tory youth rallies.
I have a collection of German marching tunes on 78 RPM CDs.
I will fashion an Alan Jarrett memorial statue using slave labour from the Medway artist community and erect it at the War Memorial. Art, music and poetry are a blight on the Medway landscape and I would work hard to replace this will statues of Mark Francois and other military figures.
I am comfortable with taking additional wages for doing arms consultancy with Saudi Arabia whilst relaxing at Avenue Tennis Club.

I have many criminal convictions: petty crime, grand fraud, sexual predation and so on as well as general lying and making false promises. I hope these will be an asset to the Tory party.
I hope that’s enough.

p.s. Brexit has failed – 350 000 people agree with me on this.

350 000 plus views in one day and no credible explanations of the benefits of Brexit.

Somewhat fortuitously, Rishi Sunak has just requested a new post of Prime Minister’s Official Deputy Spokesperson and Head of News. I have also applied for this using some of the ideas for the local job. No disrespect to the council but I’d prefer the top job.

No future … at Medway Council.

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Brexit Betrayal

Were you played?

I write this piece directly to leave voters. I ask you the Johnny Rotten question: Ever get the feeling you’ve been cheated? This piece of investigative journalism deserves your full attention. I’ve set out some of the main points below, but watch the entire film. You were played by Nigel Farage, Richard Tice, their shady backers and their poster boy Boris Johnson. They took you for fools with well executed lies about fish, the NHS, laws, borders, sovereignty et al. How does it feel to be treated like pawns in a game that you were never part of? You will be paying for Brexit for decades in your pay packets, your freedoms, your health, wealth and happiness. It is time to demand your money back for the illusions of Brexit. Watch and learn how you were played:

The Brexit illusion of sovereignty was just that – an illusion – we could not have had fox hunting, pints, three pin plugs etc. if we were enslaved to a European superstate

The Farage illusion of taking back control of our fish was also an illusion. Many fishing businesses are suffering under Brexit

The Brexit illusion of funding our NHS failed. The £350 million every week never arrived

The Brexit illusion of a United Kingdom failed. Northern Ireland will eventually unite with the Republic of Ireland. Scotland and probably Wales will also leave Brexit Albion

The Brexit illusion of growth failed. Liz Truss’ experiment with Brexonomics took £100 BILLION off the UK balance sheet. You will be paying for this long into the future.

The Brexit illusion of frictionless trade never happened. With food inflation of 15% and a Government fear of implementing border checks lest it leads to food shortages

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