Will you help my cat, Stan remove a Tory in Gillingham and Rainham? Donate generously now so we can get him onto the ballot paper for the General Election, giving them a genuine and compelling protest vote, splitting the vote and spelling Cat-astrophe for the Tories. Miaaaaooooowwwww.
We have decided to stand a cat for election in June 2024 to get the Tories out in my area of Medway (#GTTO), having done extraordinarily well in 2019 with a similar approach. Read why this is not a batshit or catshit crazy idea here. lease support the project by clicking on the crowdfunder link. We have until THURSDAY 13th June to make a decision to fully fund a mailing to 70 000 people in the constituency and we have no political backers.
GOALS
Stan the Cat will achieve one of three outcomes:
Suppress disaffected Tory voters who will not vote differently by getting them to vote for Stan.
Remove hard Tory voters by switching them toReform UK, thus splitting the Tory vote and allowing the tactical candidate to win.
Moving soft Tory voters by getting them to vote tactically for the recommended tactical voting party.
This is a carefully calibrated tactic based on deep knowledge of the area and expert level skills in canvassing. We will systematically target Tory voting areas and leave people alone who have already made a different choice other than the Tories.
What do we stand for?
Read our CATIFESTO below:
Blue Stan. Other colours are available. Click to BACK a CAT.
I bumped into someone I used to know at open mic jam sessions the other week. I knew him as ‘shy Elvis’. A diffident individual who would only perform Elvis songs and then only after extensive rehearsal. At the time (maybe 10 years ago), he seemed intensely nervous and rather shy. He inhabited the persona of Elvis Presley with brylcreemed hair, sideburns and a rockabilly sense of fashion. Rooted in the 1950s but probably born in the late 70s or early 80s, he was something of an enigma.
Pump it up
I was in a local pharmacy where a much older Elvis was haranguing the local pharmacist. I could not help but listen as he had raised his voice considerably. It was clear that he was on a whole cocktail of medicines for anxiety, depression and a palette of what could be described as 21st century malaises. Several items of his medication were unavailable and the pharmacist was patiently explaining this to him. He was shouting “but I have to have medicine x, I have to have medicine y”. He became more aggressive towards the female pharmacist and she went off to investigate the possibility of securing supplies.
Micro Brexorcism
I interjected: “Hello Elvis”.
He did a double take. I reminded him about our acquaintance at jam sessions. He recognised me, so we had just a sliver of rapport.
I went on “Just to explain, she cannot get you the medicines as there are massive shortages due to Brexit”.
He barked back, having not really listened “I don’t care, I just want my drugs”.
I repeated calmly “Brexit is causing your shortages. She cannot help that”. The pharmacist had returned by that time and nodded privately to me.
Elvis then shouted again at her “I just came to get my drugs and I’m now getting a lecture about politics”.
I replied “I’m just trying to explain why you cannot get your medication”. The pharmacist nodded and then asked him to come back in a few days.
I would hazard an educated guess from my previous contact with “Elvis” that he probably voted for Brexit or perhaps did not vote at all and became cross that I had in effect connected his lived experience to the root cause of his problems. This is what we must do as part of a much longer Brexorcism process.
Ask Elvis …
Keep asking Brexiteers difficult questions using every opportunity.
There’s a lot to be done in the next six weeks in the run up to the General Election aka Independence Day. We have a one time opportunity to change the course of the future … this will not wait !! I am spreading my effort across a number of initiatives to meet several goals :
To remove the Tory majority and end the chaos of 14 years of Tory disaster capitalism jet propelled by Brexit.
To introduce more plurality in Parliament and make sure that Brexit and Joining the EU anew remains on the agenda.
To this end, we have several collaborative projects which you must join:
Getleafletting
To get a minimum of 500 000 of our ABC (Anyone But Conservative) leaflets out to various constituencies. Please order yours NOW by mailing me at reboot@brexitrage.com Guide prices : 500 = £42, 2000 = £67, 5000 £100 etc. These are non-party campaigning leaflets, perfectly legal to use alongside regular campaigning. We need a small army of people to get these leaflets out. If you cannot deliver leaflets but want to get the Tories out, please send money so that we can buy the needed leaflets and resource distribution. By sponsoring others, you will get digital copies of the leaflet to use on social media and in other communications.
Mail us to get your leaflets.Mail us to get your leaflets.
Boots on the ground – Epsom, Ewell and Leatherhead
We will support Helen Maguire on the ground and online in Epsom, Ewell and Leatherhead. The area is Chris “Failing” Grayling’s constituency and the new Tory candidate is a Trump supporter with a reliable track record of losing elections!! Having worked on the ground in Epsom, Ewell and Leatherhead for Gina Miller, I have determined that the area is a two horse race between The Lib Dems and one nation Tories. As such and having done some due diligence on the situation I can no longer support Gina Miller’s party in Epsom, as I believe it will split the vote to stop the Tories. To help the Lib Dems to win this seat in the blue wall on the ground, online or both, please mail me at reboot@brexitrage.com
Helen Maguire’s pitch.
I plan a meeting to discuss the GE at the Ewell Tap on Thursday May 30th. This is the same day as BBC Question Time.
Boots on the ground – Rejoin Party
We will support the Rejoin Party in Sidcup and Bexley and in other places where they are standing. Rejoin are fresh from a massive vote in the London Assembly Elections and will publish their target seats soon. Who’s in for this?
Rejoin EU.
Boots on the ground – The Climate Party
The Climate Party are a small party with an excellent strategy to target centre-right voters who are concerned about sustainable development and environment but with a pragmatic view of how Britain may seize the initiative from zero carbon politics. Ed Gemmill leads the party. They seek candidates and volunteers and are willing to pay the deposit for standing in July 4th. See Change the Climate. Ed is himself targeting “Brexit Hardman” Steve Baker’s constituency of High Wycombe, a worthy target for a man who has done so much damage to Britain. If you can help in target seats below, get in touch via info@theclimate.party We are especially interested in candidates in the following areas below but if you have vim and vigour, please apply anyway.
One mission, One vision.
Target Seats,
Swap My Vote
Maximise your vote in an unfair system by swapping it. It’s perfectly legal and decent in a broken FPTP system. Find our more at Swap My Vote.
Collaborate to win
Join us at 8 pm Monday 27 May on ZOOM via this link to discuss plans to change the course of history at the election.
I know that Brexiteers have short memories, some because they have died since 2016, but Michael Gove promised us frictionless trade, only sunny uplands with no downsides from Brexit. It seems that Gove lied. Brexit has moved Britain from frictionless trade to rough trade. Please spend 20 minutes watching Michael Lambert’s report on the matter at the end of this article – it’s well worth your time. Some highlights follow:
Rough Trade
Veterinary checks at the border are expected to add 0.2% to inflation, plus of course delays and shortages of perishable goods such as meat and veg. BBC Tory cheerleader Amol Rajan tried to make light of this on the Today programme on Monday 20 May, yet of course, it’s all totally unnecessary. In any case, 0.2% from one single issue in an instant hit is rather a lot really, certainly a lot more than the 0.08% over 10 years expected to accrue from Kemi Badenoch’s overblown CPTPP trade deal !!
Then there is the impact on haulage companies. Ciaran the Euro Courier reports on the insane practices being used at Sevington:
There is no water at the purpose built facility, apart from a tap in the toilets, no food and no option to leave the facility to get food and drink. You may be stuck there for days, especially if you arrive late in the day as the facility only operates 12 hours a day in a 24/7 logistics business. This makes onwards journeys much more dangerous for the driver and, of course, other motorists.
The inspection process compares (poorly) with prison. It is designed to be intimidating. No one speaks to you. This is nothing like the process at Calais. It is designed to be intimidating. No wonder many drivers don’t come back.
This will impact our food security despite the many mitigations, cover ups and pieces of gaslighting that will be employed to distract us. Even the fucking Torygraph and The Sun have reported that Brexit border checks will cost us £4.7 BILLION. Try measuring that in nurses, carers and fruit pickers !! To avoid upsetting their readers, the Son are now calling it BREX !!
Greenbelt …. Kent – The Lorry Park of England.
Did you vote to waste £4.7 BILLION of YOUR money on this?
All the while, the whole HMRC process is meaningless in terms of what it intends to achieve. There is 22 miles between the Sevington facility and the port of Dover. You are free to pick up migrants, contraband and additional goods if you so wish. Brexit is pointless. A tragic comedy of errors.
Pop will
Well worth your time. The work of Michael Lambert.
Most people now realise that Brexit was a mistake. Make sure politicians hear you loud and clear in the run up to the GE, especially Labour. Write to them today. It matters not whether they respond or whether you like them or not.
I took a rare holiday in Normandy last week. The stark differences between Brexit Britain and France were plain. The border crossing was uneventful until we returned to British customs on the way back, with an amount of petty bureaucracy. We had chosen to go by Le Shuttle to avoid potential delays on the M20 / M2 which forced the cost up, but it was more relaxed overall.
On the first evening, we went shopping to get some provisions. I was struck by the price of cheese (inexpensive) and bought a bottle of Malbec for €1.99 !!! It was surprisingly good and would retail from £9 upwards here, probably more after Brexit border checks are introduced which may add 60% to the price of imported goods. Oh well, it’s what they wanted.
But what really struck me was the sense of community and state of high streets in French towns and villages. More so because I watched a film of “English Patriots” saying that they had no identity, because we have no nursery rhymes, have to drink coffee and are no longer allowed to eat fish and chips or meat and two veg. Painfully funny reportage by Max Robespierre below:
By contrast, I noted that entire families dine out in the towns I visited, including children, who ate real food, not fast food. I hardly saw any children playing computer games in cafes with their parents. Instead they had family conversations. A common complaint of the English Patriots is that the high street has been taken away from them. It’s no wonder when many of them shop at Tesco etc. In the high streets of Normandy, it was not a constant stream of kebab joints, vaping huts and coffee outlets. Whilst the butcher, baker and candlestick maker are absent from most English towns, there was a rich diversity of shops in the French towns. Although there are supermarkets, they are not of the massive size that are allowed in Britain. I sense a very different approach to town planning and culture. The very culture that the English patriots crave is present … in France!! Perhaps Margaret Thatcher was right when she said that “there is no such thing as (English) society”.
Britain seems to have invested in the industrialisation of high streets / consumption and much of what these people feel they have lost is the product of this process. The faux nostalgia of the English Brexit patriots is painfully summed up by Billy Bragg in his epic song “Full English Brexit”.
Amidst all the other carnage of Brexit, Tory sleaze, corruption and mismanagement a rather odd item emerged into the political landscape this week. It was a report from Conservative Home stating that Brexit had not produced ANY benefits, now or into the future. It also pointed out that Brexit has cost us some 2-3% in terms of resilience. Actually that figure is ‘conservatively’ low aka a LIE. Best estimates suggest a 4.5% GDP hit to the UK economy into perpetuity… with a peak of 5-6% by 2035. Any ideas of growth from Liz Truss, Rishi Sunakered or Keir Starmer are therefore for the birds. And it’s not just GDP. Imports and exports will tank by 15% The impact of post-Brexit trade deals is minimal at best and probably insignificant, never mind the social and environmental effects of Brexit.
Seeing is believing … from the horse’s mouth below !!
This comes on a day when David Cameron stepped out into the open and more or less admitted that Brexit was the main obstacle in addressing the question of illegal migration. He had to backtrack in order to avoid having several organs removed by ERG hopefuls Truss, Badenoch, Mordaunt, Braverman et al. I’ve said on many occasions that Cameron did not rejoin mainline politics as a swansong, and despite his many peccadilloes, we should ‘play the ball and not the man‘. Of course, I have been pilloried by Labour ideologues and Remoaners with visceral reactions to Lord Cameron. Nonetheless, I’m possibly right and willing to eat a hat if I’m wrong, in the absence of any serious and cohesive cross party strategy to join the EU anew. Watch Peter Stefanovic’s surgical analysis of Cameron’s ‘walk on the wild side’.
Lord Cameron is backtracking on his suggestion Brexit is to blame for no asylum returns deal with France
But damning report from Durham University has found the primary factor in sky rocketing small boat crossings is Brexit -namely a decision to leave without a returns agreement pic.twitter.com/03MHXnN87r
In case anyone is still confused about ways to address immigration, watch my two minute film on the solution. Of course, the overarching solution to immigration is the end of Brexit which has now failed : it’s OFFICIAL.
Just two minutes needed.
In case of any doubt as to the manufacture of the immigration issue:
2015: 299 crossed on small boats 2022: 45,000 crossed on small boats Post Dublin Regulations. No returns arrangement made in that ‘oven ready deal’, burned to a crisp!!
Not only have we had five Prime Ministers since Brexit, we have also had five lecterns. Each of them have a different character, like each PM and each has cost the taxpayer more than Angela Rayner’s alleged tax scam. Liz Truss’ Jenga lectern cost an uncool £4175, seemingly appropriate, as, no doubt it could be rebuilt into something else 49 days later … In this article we look at the emerging “academic discipline” of lecternology inspired by Peter Hurst and Peter Stefanovic.
Cameron
Cameron’s lectern was designed by his head of operations to appear “statesmanlike”. Cameron was the youngest PM and, as such, the wood for his lectern was sourced from B&Q, using freshly cut pine with a curved, flared column, signifying agility and smoothness, and a glossy finish to signify superficiality. Read more on Cameron at Cameron.
May
The simple religious cross style of Theresa’s oak lectern symbolises her victimhood as the Prime Minister who felt a sense of duty to serve but who ultimately would be hoist by her own inner conflict. In the end, the ERG and Remainers placed her on a cross for sacrifice in favour of someone more malleable. That person would be the fatberg formerly known as Boris Johnson.
Johnson
Johnson’s lectern column and base are the thickest of the five, matching the intelligence and heft of the incumbent. “The Johnson” as it was referred to in No 10 was constructed of teak for strength, as it doubled as a shagging plinth for internal use. It is believed that Carrie’s children were conceived on “The Johnson” along with other random offspring from the Brexit staffers during Partygate.
Truss
The Truss lectern is perhaps the most interesting in so far that it is constructed using Jenga. This would enable quick breakdown and reassembly after her 49 days tenure. We have an authentic woodchip replica of The Truss ceremonial lectern available on e-bay for the bargain price of £30 000. This would enable us to stand a lettuce for election in her South West Norfolk constituency. Tony Hanlon commented on the spiral construction “Its a treasured memory of her death spiralling of the economy”.
Truss has since blamed the failure of her Brexonomics budget on the infiltration of left-wing Norwegian wood into her lectern at a cost of £70 billion to the taxpayer and the ruination of young people’s hopes of home ownership. John Lennon, Kate Bush, Chris Witty and Angela Rayner have been blamed by The Truss, along with left wing lawyers, left wing carpenters, carping judges, civil servants, punk rockers, classicists, MDF, lettuce, homosexuals, trannies, the blob, layabouts, drug users, climate protesters, smoking bans, Potter Heigham, Brundall, The A47, The Bank of England, The OBR, UN, The Queen, charities, do-gooders, poets, artists, piss artists, vegans, Christians, Moslems, London, wood carvers, carvery owners, wood workers, sex workers, sex swappers, The Lib Dems, brie, gorgonzola, camembert, left wing cheese, real ale drinkers, real world thinkers, Remoaners, men, women, children, animals, plants, left wing micro-organisms, algae, fungi, Liz’s parents and all members of the deep state who sought to bring her down. The Jenga lectern proved to be her downfall and it was nothing to do with her incompetence, social ineptitude and the triumph of confidence over competence. That is a disgrace. In Liz’s own words “Liz Truss is best ignored”.
Click on the description to buy The Truss on e-bay.
Sunakered
The Sunak lectern is paradoxical. It is bigger than the other lecterns although Sunak is possibly the shortest Prime Minister in history. The upright section is designed to obscure both of Rishi’s legs for reasons of modesty and as support in case he were to break one. Just like its user, the Sunak lectern has no integrity, professionalism or accountability, being made from offcuts from the “previous administration”.
All of the above are, of course, pathetic attempts to look in control by people who are easily persuaded by presentation over content.
We recently went to Dover to find out what people really think about Brexit. Most now realise that they were lied to and Brexit has not delivered on the promises from the 2016 ‘brochure’. Write to your MP to demand an end to Brexit carnage. Contrary to what people believe, Brexit is far from done and it’s possible to Rejoin if we apply enough pressure. The Rejoin Party are standing 11 candidates in the London Mayoral Election, in non-competitive seats under a proportional system, so it is possible to express your view without damaging Mayor. Watch our video account of the day:
The most insightful part of our day was not recorded, when we came upon the station staff at Dover Priory rail station. Three men and one woman. The woman was born and bred in the area, had a mining family from Shepherdswell, probably voted Labour originally, but voted for Boris in 2019 on the promise of stopping immigration. She planned to vote for Reform as she felt betrayed by the Tories. As usual she was resistant to questions about being lied to (time was very short for a decent Brexorcism) and said she did not care about future generations (again this is typical of the residual hardcore Brexiteer). Her colleagues were most amused as we asked questions and gently prodded her about her underlying xenophobia (one of the other station staff was black).
Our leaflets are now ready to destroy the Tories. Please mail me at reboot@brexitrage.com to order yours. Together with your order, you will receive digital versions of the leaflet for use on social media. For local versions of the leaflet with different text please get in touch. Low res drafts below:
Niall Ó Conghaile reviews the bizarre outcomes of the post-Brexit metric review. Talking Pints was originally published by East Anglia Bylines. Historically Britain has led the way in setting international standards. So will the pint bottle of champagne return in a post Brexit world?
Following Brexit there was a lot of excitement in the UK about the possible return of the pint bottle of champagne. Apparently, this size of bottle was much beloved of Winston Churchill, and so for reasons to do with winning the War (?) it was important that the pint bottle return.
The claim had become widespread before Brexit that the pint bottle had been banned by metrification and the diabolical Brussels bureaucrats. Of course, it was all nonsense. Pint bottles of cider, for example, are widely available under European law.
So why can’t you get pint bottles of champagne?
It’s because of regulation and standardisation. Just not in the way that you might think.
The 750 ml bottle is now almost the global standard. However, in the past in France (and indeed Europe) non-standard bottle sizes were common.
Over time the variations reduced to the few that remain today in your local Auchan, Lidl or Kaufland. But why are Britons forced to drink the continental 750 ml and not a true British pint of champers?
Actually, the 750 ml is British, or at least “for Britain”. Dealing with all those irregular wine bottle sizes, and an irregular number of bottles to the case, was an irritant to the wine merchants and wholesalers of London in centuries gone by.
750 ml was the standard set in France to facilitate exports to … Britain.
Why? The six bottles amounted to… one imperial gallon.
Why would a château in Bordeaux care?
The UK for much of the 19th century was the richest country in the world and had the richest middle class with the most disposable income. The UK was the largest importer of wine – other big consuming countries drank their own.
Moreover, the wholesalers in London were also often suppliers to British colonies and much of the rest of the world – in both the actual Empire, and the informal Empire. In places like Argentina, Britain was often the centre of the world. Hence the standards set in London became international standards.
Incidentally this British influence can also be seen in other ways in the world of wine, including the taste and types of fortified wines exported.
Standardisation meant that the pint bottle, for most wines, was effectively the Betamax of vessels: something to be nostalgic about, sure; but too costly to continue producing separately.
So who is the dominant force now?
The UK remains an important market for wine, of course. But it is very far from dominant.
Nowadays wine producers and the “Place de Bordeaux” market tend to have prices (especially at the top end) set by the United States and increasingly East Asian markets. This is even starting to change how the wine is produced and how it tastes.
The old wine markets of Europe, like London, that used to set the prices, have gone by the wayside. Now they just remain tram-stop names, and squares in old towns.
Post Brexit Britain is somewhat in the same position
Policymakers in the UK have to adjust to the reality of no longer setting international standards. The UK no longer offers markets of bulk. Nor does it have recognised high standards that others are keen to adopt.
Such realisation is painful, for sure. But isn’t it healthier than trying to keep up with the European and America behemoths. After all, Australia and Switzerland don’t try to have their own “world-leading standards”.
Yet many Brexiteers, and some in the Labour Party, seem to have difficulty in adjusting to the UK’s new place in the world.
Why are they finding their new role vis-à-vis standard-setting and regulation so hard to understand?
Once you accept that it’s inevitable that you will accept European standards, then the point becomes, why not get the full benefit of common standards by being inside a single market?
We leave you with a punk rock song about the difficulty of ordering two pints of lager and a packet of crisps – based on Max Spodge’s difficulty in being heard at the Tramshed in Woolwich – it was impossible to procure said 568 ml of light ale in the 1980’s … Splodgenessabounds were an oi band which the editor played with in days of yore … I doubt Max had foreseen the problems of Brexit, but just as a soft landing for this article …
