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Five Years

Five years on and Brexit’s still undone. I often get quaint looks when I talk about Brexit in Kent now and some subtle or even less subtle social disapproval. For the record, I’m quite happy to be considered to be “so last year” until I am returned to the soil by my maker, or Brexit is placed in a shallow grave, whichever comes soonest. Brexit is in fact undone now that Johnson has realised he never read the contract. It will never be “done”. I told everyone that we’d be doing Brexit for the next 50 years and it begins to look that way. In five years it becomes apparent that we still don’t know what Brexit means but we are beginning to make some evaluation of what Brexit has brought us.

Economic effects

£2.3 Trillion was lost in just one month from the city of London. Just for comparison and scale, that’s 58 years’ worth of our contribution of £39 billion to the EU wiped out in just one month. So, we would have to make up our losses due to Brexit until 2079 just from this impact alone. Let that sink in!!

Our Australia trade deal is worth 0.02% of GDP over 15 years. It would take 2000 deals like this to even make up our losses from our arrangements with the EU. At a generous estimate of our rate of deal making, we can expect to make up the losses from Brexit in trade deals by the year 3021. I know that’s bad economics as not all trade deals are worthless and some also take years not months but I think you should get the point.

£37 billion has wasted on test and trace. That’s more than what it takes to land a space mission on Mars at a mere £22.5 billion. Our contribution to the EU is £39 billion per year.

Despite promises made to fishermen on Brexit, the UK fishing industry will have been filleted by the time any new arrangements come into being with £1 Million being bled from the fisherman every DAY. Yet, we plan to spend £200 million on a Royal Yacht that the Royal family do not want or need. Brexit McBrexitFace will no doubt spend its time trawling international waters trying to net trade deals without catching anything more than scurvy.

Brexit shrank UK services exports by more than £110 billion over a four-year period. That’s 3 x our yearly contribution to the EU, much of which we get back.

Farmers have also been sold down the river with the introduction of hormone fed beef and the dumping of poor quality products into UK markets, just so that Liz Truss can claim success.

The building industry is beginning to show cracks with materials shortages and other supply chains being affected.

Food and drink exports from UK have declined by 50% since the beginning of 2021.

The UK has been on a downward slide in terms of our overall credit rating.

Coming soon, having lost EU steel import protections, our steel industry now faces a wave of cheap imports.

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Social / Welfare / Environmental

Brexit has been all consuming on Civil Service bandwidth and this means that there have been numerous areas of neglect. For example: social care, Grenfell, The Northern Ireland protocol and citizenship issues remain undone with massive consequences for lives and livelihoods. 305 000 people are caught in civil service backlogs for settled status and Johnson says he will not budge on the deadline of June 30th with impact on breaking up families and imprisonment at borders. Big issues in 2016 are still issues in 2021 due to the significant entropy of Brexit on progress across the board of Government.

“You can stay but your kids can’t”.

We are yet to see the whole impact of the end of the grace period at the borders but already all major supermarkets have imposed rationing on tinned tomatoes with food shortages predicted in the coming months and the army on standby.

There have been notable increases in racist attacks, tension between Brexiteers and Remainers and a disunited Kingdom.

And, of course, far from taking back control of £350 million per week for the NHS, Dido Harding is on the way to privatising your NHS. Was this on the side of a bus?

We did not need to do Brexit to deal with immigration. Our hostile environment has discouraged Europeans to work here. In particular we have seen a sharp decline in fruit pickers, care workers and other professions. The arguments made by Brexiteers to “grow our own” have not gathered any takers …

Political / Constitutional

The destruction of peace in Northern Ireland has already begun by the reckless abandonment of the Good Friday Agreement. Johnson promised there would be no border down the Irish Sea. He broke that promise, ending 30 years of peace on the island of Ireland. Kate Hoey has been cynically and dangerously stoking the fires of unrest in Northern Ireland, having promoted Brexit.

The destruction of the United Kingdom has begun with Scotland seeking independence, reunification of Ireland and independence movements beginning in Cornwall and the North East. Independence for Scotland and unity for Ireland are of course good things and entirely predictable consequences of Brexit. In extremis, England will be reduced to the People’s Republic of Thurrock by 2040!! Gibraltar has special status as a means of dealing with the fact that the majority of residents work in Spain. In 10-20 years time we can expect Gibraltar to be under Spanish control. The same goes for The Falkland Islands, The Channel Islands and The Isle of Man.

The UK is now a four nation state and a one party state with no effective opposition. It may sound hard to say this but Brexit is as much a product of a passive and fearful opposition than it is the result of a hard core of Brexit ultras and psychopaths.

Britain no longer has a special relationship with the USA as President Biden seeks to re-educate us about the realities of breaking international law. At the same time Biden has forged stronger links with Europe as a natural partner of similar size in terms of trade and other opportunities.

I invite Brexiteers to provide a list of benefits of Brexit – Five years waiting

Ethical / Legal

Protest is now being clamped down on, using COVID as an umbrella to hide under. Boris Johnson is to remove the powers of the Electoral Commission after they asked awkward questions about the redecoration of his flat.

Crony contracting continues as The Good Law Project reveals details of companies offered lucrative contracts based on personal networks rather than competence in the chosen industry. If you are to shrug and say “so what” to this, these contracts were for PPE. This means that people will have died unnecessarily because of faulty selection procedures. You may well say that the pandemic demanded a speedy response. Well the speediest response would have been to select companies with the capacity and competence to make the products rather than novices.

My own MP Mr Rehman Chishti is under investigation for having his hand in the till over property development scandals. You can help by reporting him to the bar council.

We have still not found the identity of the Tory rapist. Is this an example for our children to look up to?

It now seems that our children are to sing a Soviet styles song in school to unite the country. I have a better suggestion – see the song below

OBON
Ignorance is strength – Post Brexit education syllabus

I could go on but I won’t. All this in just five years … and we’ve only just begun …

A collaborative effort to mark five years of Brexit carnage from Greg, Lisa, Patricia, Irina, Andrew, Adrian, Mike, Helga and the good people at Re-Boot Britain. Join us every Monday to Break Brexit Before Brexit Breaks Britain.

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Brexit opportunities

Career opportunities

There is a job going for Director, Brexit opportunities in the Cabinet Office – I was excited by the prospect of finding out what these were after five years of waiting patiently so I have applied. My application is below. I’d urge you to do the same. Here is the specification:

Brexit opportunities

Dear Lord Sir David Frost,

I have been an avid follower of your work ever since The Frost Report and I was excited to see your research post for a Director of the BOU (Brexit Opportunities Unit). You need look no further, as you have found your man. To quote ELO, ‘I’ve been searchin’ for five years on my own account, meticulously comparing what we had in the EU with what we are getting, now that Brexit is out of the oven. I’d like to continue that research in the quest for the economic, social, technological, ethical, environmental and constitutional benefits of Brexit. As far as your job specification goes, I meet and exceed your requirements, in brief:

  • I am a skilled researcher, covering qualitative and quantitative methods, survey design and communications. With 3.5 degrees covering science, business and HR, I am quite used to dealing with the distortion of data by politicians, so I’d be more than able to extract the Brexit benefits from the background noise, if they exist. Broadly speaking, I am happy to continue with your line of “if the facts don’t fit the story, change the facts or just erase them”.
  • I am used to dealing with intelligent senior people across industry, politics, media and in public life. I am quite sure I could “level down” to work with imbeciles, sycophants and psychopaths as required by the role. I met the Prime Minister in 2012 shortly after the Olympics when he was dating a young woman so we have actually met.
  • In terms of change management, I have written 12 books on leadership and one on the question of changing minds on Brexit. Admittedly, the strategies in “Let’s Talk About BREX .. it” are directed towards the removal of illusions and fantasies about Brexit, what I call “Brexorcism”. However, these change management strategies are just as applicable to the erasure of people’s minds who voted to Remain, although it may be a lot quicker to round these people up and send them to a BCC (Brexit Concentration Camp) – in fact, I will make a proposal on this separate matter to Priti Patel shortly. I am prepared to work on this for 50 years as suggested by Jacob Rees-Mogg.
Change minds on Brexit
  • In terms of commanding confidence, I am a skilled practitioner of speaking truth to power. I see that lying is a precondition for doing the job and I would cope with this by using a placard saying “fake news” whenever I give a public brief to the media for greater clarity. In any case, in the post-Brexit world, the truth is an expensive luxury. I see that you, Johnson, Patel, Hancock, Raab, Duncan Smith, Francois et al. have managed to get by without needing to get dragged down by the truth. Bravo!!
  • As regards changing laws, I have no respect for the law, having been let down by the Police on several occasions when being attacked by Brexiteers. This means that I regard the law as unimportant in the quest to get Brexit done. Judges and the judiciary are one of the areas we must target to remove the scales of justice from people’s eyes.
  • I was considered to be too organised to get a job for Dominic Cummings. This demonstrates my ability to stick at something that has been a proven failure over the long term.
Dealing with the Russians at Parliament – Photograph by Bruce Tanner http://www.brucetanner.com
  • Crucially I have no political experience at all, a massive asset in a political world befuddled by political experts.  Who needs experts (Gove, Govia). But I am good at coming up with meaningless phrases to describe the toxic cocktail of Corona crisis + Brexit disaster aka “Britastrophe“.
  • In the words of The Clash “I hate the army and I hate the R.A.F. I don’t wanna go fighting in the tropical heat. I hate the civil service rules. I won’t open a letter bomb for you.”
  • Put plainly, if Dido Harding can run the NHS, I can run the fucking Cabinet Office, FFS.
  • In summary, 27 years diverse experience as a business consultant, author, speaker and academic, working with companies such as Unilever, Pfizer, The UN, Virgin, BP. Find me at Linkedin.

On the suggestion of Julia Smith, may I ask for these other fringe benefits:

  • Free flags for my home, car etc.
  • Private health insurance delivered by the NHS
  • Cocaine discounts
  • Free use of the Royal Yacht Brexit McBrexitFace at weekends
  • Exclusive access to PPE contracts for which I am quite unsuitable @ £107 million per item
  • I require a minimum of two cats in the office at anyone time and a supply of fresh food for the kitties
  • A job for my son in strategic management
  • A gravy train and two year’s supply of Bisto

Yours in waiting

Peter

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Brexit has failed

I never thought I’d be able to say that Brexit had failed so quickly, as we supposedly ended up with a Brexit deal rather than “WTO, way to go”. But, already we are seeing the “hors d’ouevre” of Brexit. I have summarised just some of the early impacts, as Brexit reality meets satire. This is a long post so hold on to your butts.

Hotel California Brexit

It seems that the British people are fed up with Brexit – A recent report from The Guardian stated that Britons do not want continuous negotiations with the EU over Brexit. This failure to understand the complexities of international trade and co-operation infected the Brexit debate and it will not go away just because people wish it. In the words of some leave voters, Brits had better “get used to it”, especially as the obstacles to progress continue to come from the UK in the main. For example David Frost’s repeated demands to cancel the Brexit agreement which he signed. Such things simply frustrate the prospects of making the relationship work and it is plain that Brussels and the 27 states are getting tired of our repeated sabre rattling, done only to create the impression that Britannia rules the waves. Hotel California seems to describe Brexit well, as we keep wanting to change aspects of an agreement that we signed in haste so that Johnson could claim that Brexit was out of the oven.

Crocodile Dundee Brexit

Liz Truss’ much spun trade deal with Australia is worth just £1 per person per year. How will you spend it? A pack of Tim Tams perhaps? Against that backdrop, The National Farmer’s Union reports that the Australian Trade Deal will break British farming. Listen to Farming Today on Radio 4 which should now be renamed Brexit Carnage Today.

Rough Justice

In another massive climbdown from the promises of Brexit, hidden from view by COVID, Johnson’s Government has just agreed to accept jurisdiction from The European Court of Justice (ECJ). This was one of the cornerstones of Brexit – if you remember the idea of “taking back control” of our laws and so on. So far we have not taken back control of our borders either and we already had our own currency.

We must continue to change minds on Brexit – please buy our book on Amazon – chick on the image

Frosty the No Man

Lord David Frost has just run scared from his role as Brexit negotiator, just ahead of January 1st 2021 when the grace period ends and we commence full customs checks and tariffs on imports and exports to the EU. This is expected to add on average an eye watering 11% to costs of goods entering the UK and will further exacerbate the near 5% inflation that is predicted for 2022 in the UK. This follows 4.2% inflation in 2021, an unprecedented figure with a major contribution from Brexit. Our predictions of stagflation are gradually coming true.

This twitter thread explains the carnage to come in January better than I can:

Ryanair have just abandoned the London Stock Exchange in preparation for Brexit. Expect more of this as Brexit Britain melts down.

Trussed up on Brexit Bollocks

Liz Truss has been lined up to succeed David Frost. Perhaps this an attempt by Johnson to ensure that “The Truss” does not manage to launch a leadership challenge, after all Brexit has already consumed five ministers. Or, perhaps it is intended to demonstrate the impossibility of Brexit due to Liz’s unprecedented levels of incompetence. Nonetheless, the DUP see Liz as an easy touch and have already begun to lobby her to invoke Article 16 and threaten peace and stability in Northern Ireland. Nice people! See Trussed up

Unmasking Brexit Carnage

In the months after Boris Johnson signed his post-Brexit trade deal with the European Union, COVID masked the economic damage of leaving the bloc. As the pandemic drags on, the cost is becoming clearer and voters are noticing. Goods trade with the EU was 15.7% lower to October 2018, in line with HM Government predictions.
The article above shows that Brexit has been a drag on growth. It brought new red tape on commerce between Britain and its largest and closest market, and removed a large pool of EU labour from the country on which many businesses had come to rely. The combination has exacerbated supply chain shortages, stoked inflation and hampered trade. In March 2020 I coined the phrase Britastrophe to describe the toxic combination of Corona crisis + Brexit disaster. It has literally allowed Johnson to mask Brexit:

Download Britastrophe

Clapping for shortages

Still Johnson continues with distraction, dither and delay. This costs lives. I predict a new round of clapping soon …. What shortages did I miss?

Monday : Turkey farmers, postal workers and food pickers

Tuesday : Gas workers, plumbers, hospital porters and brewers

Wednesday : Foreign butchers, space scientists and food processing staff

Thursday : Foreign surgeons, opticians, researchers and podiatrists

Friday : Dentists, accountants, computer programming specialists, security staff

Saturday : Hospitality staff, customer service agents, warehouse staff, teachers

Sunday : Fork lift truck drivers, social carers, radiographers, distribution agents

We may have to double up on most days due to the number of sectors and people affected …

Image by the wonderful Aidan Grooville

Killing in the name of Brexit

Brexit ideology kills. Plain and simple. Write to your MP to tell them.

So, here it is, merry Brexmas, everybody’s having fun. Look to the future. It’s only just begun …

Download The Brexit Party Album via https://academy-of-rock.bandcamp.com/album/now-the-brexit-party-album
What distractions will Johnson think of next to continue his reign of incompetence?
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Find Aidan at Twitter https://twitter.com/AidanGrooville

COP 26

COP 26

Will world leaders COP out at COP 26? The world is watching.

Brexit madness makes our climate change problems much worse:

Increased transportation increases the Carbon footprint of Brexit Britain.

A bonfire on standards leads to moral hazard in materials and product manufacture. It’s back to the bad old days.

Disaster capitalism also leads to unethical practices, some of which are environmentally unsound.

Even Evan Davis sold us down the river on BBC Radio 4 when he proclaimed that, until we stop flying, driving petrol based cars and stop industry we could more of less forget any progress. Although Evan is an economist he seems not to understand that billions of people making small decisions makes a massive difference to our net zero target. Importantly, his careless comments contribute to the view that “climate change is someone else’s fault”. I’d expected better from him.

Nicola Sturgeon is much more on point, having been unafraid to meet Greta Thunberg today.

We must be the adults in the room. Watch this video and share widely:

Please help support the people who made this video at COP26.

Meanwhile Johnson tries to distract with COD 26 – TY Cod War Steve

Telegraph

Telegraph

Latest Tory Party Conference news from “The Telegraph” ….

The Telegraph produces fake news so you don’t have to think …

Our edition is however filled with some basic truths, sexed up for people who refuse to read factual media. Check out the stories for real to check your understanding of what’s really going on and why it matters to you and your family.

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Rejoin EU

Routes to Rejoin EU 2021-2031

Here are our first cut stories from our Scenarios to Rejoin exercise.  We are still working on these and you can join in every Monday at 8 pm via ZOOM. So far we have four thematic stories which may end up mixing and intermingling but at present are separate:

Bluff, Bluster and Bust – predominantly macro-economic

Breadline Britain – predominantly socio-economic

The Empire Strikes Back – predominantly political 

The Eye of the Irish Tiger – predominantly global but focused on the post Brexit world outside Albion, so not exclusively Ireland, more a competitive scenario as to how the world responds to Brexit especially near neighbours

I’ve yet to capture some of the other scenarios – environmental and long range legal stuff.  But we have made huge progress down to your efforts.  Please get in touch to add your fingerprints to the work.

Please be kind. These are by no means finished and need your input.

Bluff, Bluster and Bust 

London made a bid for independence in 2030 as news that the UK economy slipped from No 4 in 2015 to No 11. This had been preceded in 2029 after the UK Brexit economy finally tanked.  The Sun reported the headline “England sick as a Brexit dog”.   

The rot had started much much earlier, when Rishi Sunak removed the triple pension lock in 2022. This produced a generation of pensioners that were effectively living on the breadline, unable to support children and grandchildren, selling off their homes to pay for retirement and care homes.  This was compounded by stagflation due to Brexit, as wages levelled off and National Insurance increased.  Working people struggled to get well-paid jobs.  Brexit economists struggled to find diversions to point the finger for Britain’s problems elsewhere but the underlying logic of high structural costs and declining economic activity defined our early years of so-called freedom.  Things became so bad in 2024 that some people in UK insist on being paid in Euros.  The Lugano Convention had still not been signed by 2026 but Britain continued to rely upon services to drive it’s economy, yet Lugano prevented UK from thriving in a post Brexit world.  Save for an uptake in food production which happened as a necessity after The Hunger Games in 2022, Britain was broken.

The new EU tax avoidance scheme came into force on January 1st 2022.  Brexit supporters started to become angry that it meant that Amazon et al had to pay tax in the countries they operated in within EU countries, whilst Britain became a haven for companies who wished to avoid tax.  This meant that people were exploited to even greater levels than before and thus the dream of Brexit became even more distant.

Contributory factors to the decline of Britain as a world economic power began quickly after Brexit with Scottish independence in 2023, Irish unification in 2025 and a decision by Wales to seek independence in 2027.  Their economies disappeared too, although Boris Johnson tried to hold back Scottish independence by moving UK public service agencies out of Scotland.  Once the contagion began, it was unstoppable with London seeking to make itself a Crown Dependency and Cornwall and The North-East asking for Regional Parliaments.

In other disruptive and unexpected events, cybercurrency became regulated as the Bitcoin economy collapsed in 2025.  Jacob Rees-Mogg lost everything in 2024 in the Sterling Crisis, after overplaying the markets with his financial trading company. The Daily Express headline said “How the mighty have fallen”, whereas The Sun ran with “Mogged off’.  The Brexit illusion of Singapore on Thames came back to bite people where it hurt most. Never more had bluff, bluster and bust made more sense to the blowhards of Brexit.

AC Grayling
Join us on Wed 8th September to discuss Rejoining the EU with Professor AC Grayling – Click picture for your ticket

Breadline Britain

By 2031, the impact of The Brexit Hunger Games had been felt through civil unrest, the formation of The People’s Progress Party (PPP), formed from the fragments of Labour, Lib Dems, a merger with The Green Party and Memoranda of Friendship with the independent Governments of Scotland, Ireland, Wales and The European Union. Although the party could not stop the damage done by Brexit, Brexit carnage had eventually unified the people against the remnants of the Conservative Party.  This took place after an attempted takeover by Jacob Rees Mogg and following the worst riots ever seen on the streets of Britain in 2022, after the impact of Brexit on food supplies, prices and availabilities of goods and services previously taken for granted.  One of the earliest acts of the PPP was to prosecute various culture carriers of Brexit.  In 2026 a group of these people were jailed for various offences, including Boris Johnson and Priti Patel.

The PPP was formed in 2023 in a complete volte face of traditional politics.  People were selected for office, based on rigorous selection methods and then elected by people’s assemblies.  Whilst the party had some politicians drawn from the best of the crop, it was formed from people from business, the arts, community leaders and so on.  This was informed by the insight that some celebrities and sportspeople were more skilled and popular than Westminster politicians.  This was however no populist uprising.  The PPP insisted on informed democracy, fought the election in 2024 on some old-fashioned ideas about trust, reforming politics and healing the country.  They won a majority of votes but lost the election to the Conservatives due to the existing FPTP system  This was based on some very good campaigning, based on an Enough is Enough message and a promise to make a Better Britain in a Better Europe through Better Politics.  This included plans for electoral reform.  It had become clear that the European Union felt they were better off without Britain at the table and, although they had left the door open to rejoining the EU, it would come with some important pre-conditions.  The most important one was for a complete removal of the Brexit ultras from power, to avoid a “Hokey Cokey Brexit” i.e. in/ou/shake it all about approach to EU membership.  Other items such as Schengen and Euro membership were negotiable depending on whether they felt that our standards of democracy were acceptable and the degree to which English exceptionalism had been removed from the political culture.

Breadline Britain tipped over in September 2021, when children were seen crying in the aisles of Dudley Tesco, as their parents fought over the last packets of frozen chicken nuggets.  An angry woman was heard to say “I voted to get my country back, but not for a chicken shortage.  I was duped”.  Once Brexit food import restrictions kicked in on October 1st 2021, the situation rapidly deteriorated.  Shortages were not limited, sporadic and selected.  They were continuous, deep and they touched everyone in strangely different ways.  Still one or two leave voters celebrated the Blitz spirit.  Laura from Basildon won a prize on “Come Dine Without Me” and went to No 10 Downing Street.  She was reported as saying “I’m actually not that hungry”, when having an austerity Christmas lunch with Boris Johnson.

Government plans to mitigate foreign lorry driver shortages due to Brexit backfired badly into 2022.  The 2000 army HGV drivers diverted to deal with the 100 000 foreign lorry driver shortage were quickly rediverted to deal with the Autumn of Discontent, which emerged because of the food shortages and rationing of specific items.  Attempts by food retailers to up HGV driver wages to £55 000 were of course welcomed by lorry drivers.  However, it quickly became apparent that this would “drive traffic” around the supply chain of drivers, as some ambulance drivers, HGV drivers in other sectors etc. decided that they fancied a better wage.  It simply created deficits in other areas.  The initial reaction of the public to the “Keep on Trucking for Britain” campaign was positive but turned sour quickly, as people realised impacts on prices and NHS services.

A tipping point in the Brexit debate was the so-called “Pigs in Blankets” famine of December 2021 where frantic parents fought for Turkeys and the trimmings in supermarkets after the supply chain broke down.  Preceded by a number of marches for and wildcat disturbances at food depots in Britain, Bernard Matthews was asked to join a Government taskforce with Ian Botham and Roger Daltrey on the future of turkeys for Christmas.  Botham promptly attempted to blame farmers for the problem and was squewered by Matthews who was heard to say “Bootiful”.  Meanwhile M&S Chair and former Conservative Party MP Archie Norman pointed out “This is totally down to Brexit.  Nothing to do with COVID and the product of a party I was once proud of, but which has now put Brexit ideology above pragmatism”.

But Britain was not beaten.  Boris Johnson, buoyed up by the birth of his second son, Aristotle, whipped up enthusiasm for British Bulldog Spirit and initiated a new scheme called Grow for Britain, where house owners were given a £50 grant to convert their gardens to allotments, using Afghans as live-in labour as part of their cultural conversion.  Johnson appeared on Gardener’s World just before Christmas in a project with Monty Don to convert the Rose Garden into a cabbage patch just before Carrie delivered Aristotle to offset people’s thoughts about food shortages at Christmas.  In real life however, the British people found that micro farming was not popular, especially in the middle of winter.

Brits, freed from lockdown restrictions and loaded with cash sought to unload their excess financial baggage by holidaying in Europe and beyond in 2022 and 2023.  But they faced a new problem.  Sterling.  In 2022, Sterling had parity with the Euro and in 2023, with the dollar, due to Britain’s new standing in the world as a third country.  Although some continued with their holidays, Rishi Sunak introduced restrictions limiting the amount of money taken on holidays to curb the Sterling crisis.  The Daily Express was unable to blame the problem on Johnny Foreigner and used the headline “Pounded by Brexit”.  Queues at passport control when the EU channel was absolutely empty made holiday makers irate, aside from the hassle and £6 charge to go into Europe.  But most staycation holidays in Britain were out of reach financially for many people, as prices were hiked due to supply and demand considerations.

Can’t get no

Shortages continued at a deep level for two more years until 2024, but they never actually went away completely.  Some items simply disappeared from shelves.  Many were unexpected, such as bleach, diagnostic tests, tonic water and some medicines for rare conditions.  As with all crises, human ingenuity finds a way.  If an out-of-stock item was discovered in a particular town on a given morning, all the stock would be gone by 9 am and then sold on the black market.  “Only Fools and Horses” became the reality in trading scarce goods and every village had a character known as Del Boy.  Clandestine banana trading was used as a kind of proxy to preserve community spirit as Del liked to say “’Ave a Banana” to keep the neighbours sweet.  The Police noted a small rise in looting, not of money or property, but of vegetables from gardens.  All the while Boris Johnson refused to accept humanitarian aid from the EU during the UK “hungry gap”.  This is the few weeks, usually in April, May and early June, after the winter crops have ended but before the new season’s plantings are ready to harvest.  Boris Johnson continued his campaign of deflection into 2023 after he swapped Carrie up for a debutante who was working as a media relations executive at The Daily Express.  This followed Carrie’s failure to host a third child for the Johnson dynasty.

Little things seem to irritate more than the big-ticket items.  Whilst people were prepared to forget the £37 billion wasted on fictional PPE and the 150 000 unnecessary COVID deaths, they found it extremely annoying that the EU’s new satellite system Galileo made GPS navigation much more accurate with implications for driverless cars and HGV’s into 2027.  Insurance companies started to insist on the use of Galileo as the gold standard for driverless vehicles and people were able to access Galileo on a paid for basis.

Although Boris Johnson attempted to deflect the fact that Britain has systematically degraded its levels of food security over decades, people were more persuaded by the continuing food shortages in 2022 and the so called “Andrex Wars”.  Strategies to pay lorry drivers extra by commercial companies are seen to backfire after it becomes obvious that these were taking staff away from NHS ambulance drivers and critical services.  In any case smart young people who saw the future did not want to take up careers as lorry drivers as they saw the advent of driverless trucks in 2028.  Some hauliers upgraded to LHV rather than training new HGV drivers.  The trucks were more efficient, lower GHG emissions per tonne transported.

After a complete meltdown of the Conservative party in 2027 and the removal of the Brexit ultras from power with some being imprisoned, the PPP finally got elected in 2028 and began the business of Rejoining the EU.  This was preceded by riots by pensioners after free prescriptions were removed in 2026 on the road to privatisation of the NHS.

Rejoin EU
Join us on Wed 8th September to discuss Rejoining the EU with Professor AC Grayling – Click picture for your ticket

2016 revisited

I came across a Linkedin post that wrote just before the referendum in May 2016 entitled “Should I Stay or Should I Go“. It attracted a lot of commentary including a 2916 word essay from one chap who outlined all the benefits of Brexit. I was reminded of the article and struck by just how inaccurate his predictions were. I reminded the chap of this, an HR professional, now retired. He replied that it was a casual comment and not an essay. He then became angry as I called him to account and phoned me up to tell me to ‘lighten up”. Why would I when he has ruined future generations’ futures? Later on he removed his comment and left Linkedin to cover his tracks. I confess that this was not my finest act of Brexorcism, but nonetheless, I’m sure his essay will have appeared to have weight. I’ve summarised it here as an interesting record of Brexit illusions. The trouble is, he still believes them!! Here is a summary of the main illusions that Paul has swallowed:

TRUE : We are not leaving NATO et al

FALSE : Security implications of Brexit remain unclear

FALSE : Border and travel issues are a major source of Brexit problems

FALSE : The UK economy will benefit by Billions – in fact the reverse is true

FALSE : Farming is a shitshow under Brexit and has hardly begun. Fishing the same

FALSE : Human rights are significantly reduced under Brexit

FALSE : European workers have not continued to flock here under Brexit. We are yet to see the full impacts in transport, NHS, care, hospitality, construction and so on

FALSE : Jobs and production will not move out of UK. We have seen a steady stream of jobs leaving the UK under Brexit and again this is just the beginning

TRUE : We never lost our sovereignty. The withdrawal act stated it on the first page of the document

TRUE : You cannot eat sovereignty