Back to Top

Monthly Archives: July 2020

Fatfighters

It seems that the excess deaths from Corona (approximately 30 000) are now OUR fault and nothing to do with the extremely late decisions of the Johnson Government, pre-occupied with bonging Brexit bells and minting Brexit coins. “Slimfast Johnson” has launched a war on Britain’s fatties, having previously told the nation to eat what we like. The 17 stone clinically obese manchild has done this at a time when some other news was “forgotten” …

Dominic Cummings, architect of Vote Leave Lies, has said that Brexit may be a mistake.

17 Tories have been caught with Russian donations in their “tills”. The list includes “Dishy Rishi Sunak” (slim) and Business Secretary Alok Sharma, Robert Buckland and Brandon Lewis.

Brexit talks have reached another impasse, with an illegal No Deal Brexit on the horizon to compound the problems from Corona.

Instead of dealing with these problems, Johnson plans to do dance classes from No 10 to fight the flab.

Never mind the future of the country, slim for Britain

Britastrophe

People ask me about the thinking behind the “Britastrophe” stickers from EU Flag Mafia. I took some time to design the slogan way back in March and a quick look behind the scenes reveals the thinking:

Brexit is a long term disaster in slow motion. Because of the long term nature of Brexit and the slow motion aspect, people have tended to discount the impacts or deny them as project fear. Following 1000’s of hours of on the street conversations with Brexiteers, I find that the vast majority of these people are not long range planners or strategic thinkers. They think in the here and now and tend to believe that you cannot plan for the future. Que sera sera is their modus operandi for long range planning.

However, Corona is very much in the here and now. Brexiteers recognise the impacts as they are very much within their “lived experience”. As I pointed out some 5 months ago, Corona has given us the one thing that Brexit never could. A realistic preview of Brexit, where toilet roll is currency, chicken drumsticks are traded in dark alleyways and Pampers are on their third use.

People tend to compartmentalise issues and we needed to make the connection between Corona and Brexit. In doing so we brought the short and long term together in a potent mixture. We initially tested this out on the street with my bicycle hoarding and then with the stickers.

At Leeds Henry Moore Art Gallery

In terms of sequencing the strapline, a catastrophe is bigger than a crisis or a disaster, hence the catchphrase Corona Crisis + Brexit Disaster = Britastrophe. Note the order and sequence and the use of the word Britain within the phrase. All the above must be done within as few words as possible for busy people, five in this case or three for the short form version. “Britastrophe” also sounds like the kind of word that Boris Johnson would use, hence my choice of a unique word to describe the combined effect.

I am deeply aware that people do not analyse stickers for any length of time but it’s important that we get our message across concisely and clearly.

Get your “Britastrophe” stickers at EU Flag Mafia. You may also enjoy their Bollocks to Brexit Facemasks … the best way to protect yourself from Brexit in the shops!

Sign our “Britastrophe” petition today

Used Car Salesmen

Some translations of recent populist oratory aka mutterings from the Dominic Cummings’ car boot camp of catchphrases. They fit neatly into the vernacular of the dodgy used Brexit car salesman. Whilst we are here:

Please sign the petition to recall Parliament

“There was no suggestion of Russian interference in the Brexit referendum”

We did not look for any interference so none was found

“We’re taking back control of our borders, laws and money”

We are spending £20 billion per year on red tape

“Security is not political”

We have handed over our national security to Russia

A bright new future

“The NHS is not for sale”

We just passed a law that allows us to sell the NHS

“We’ll pursue an Australian Brexit deal”

There is no such thing as an Australia deal

“Good British common sense”

Mob rule

“Strong and Stable”

Dogmatic and insipid

Build, Build, Build

“Let me be clear”

Stand by for mendacity and obfuscation

“Let’s move on”

I don’t have an answer that won’t embarrass me.

“Brexit means Brexit”

We still don’t know what the fuck Brexit is …

“We’re all in this together”

We’re in this for ourselves and fuck the rest of you

“We’re committed and determined to do whatever”

We’ve no intention of doing anything

Banged up by unscrupulous police man

“Stay at home, Control the virus”

Go on a road trip with a baby and spread the virus to Geordies

“There will be adequate food” (Michael Gove)

We are prepared to let the poor starve

“Tough choices”

Easy victims

“Get Brexit done”

Sit on our hands and pretend to negotiate, but in reality do sod all

“People I speak to on the doorstep tell me”

I don’t speak to those plebs but they voted us in and this is what we’re going to do so fuck off

Would you buy a used car from these people?

“What the Great British public wants”

I don’t feel I can argue this point, but we’re in power and we’ll do what we please – fuck off!

“Let us be clear” 

Let me fill the space with some meaningless drivel

“No deal is better than a bad deal”

We have messed up completely, totally lost out, can’t give in so we quit

“World-beating”

No one else counts

“We are not lowering British Food standards”

We just passed a law that we are lowering British Food standards

Thanks to Chris J. Stafford, Tony Vail, Charlotte Beyer, Finn Jackson, Don Adamson, Dominique Boulliez, Bill Sylvester, Edward Holmes, Nicola Tipton, Andrew Wallace, Jane Berry, Paul Anders, Stephen Corsham, Andy Janes, Sue Banting, Richard Henson, Nikki Fothergill, Jeremy Clarke, Arno Elout

Re-boot Britain

Live at Leeds

Today we hit Leeds town centre at 11.00 at the Henry Moore Art Gallery – See the Yorkshire Evening Post:

https://www.yorkshireeveningpost.co.uk/news/politics/leeds-europe-campaign-leeds-city-centre-weekend-2916569 for details

Tomorrow, we go to Durham and Barnard Castle to get our eyes checked. We have written a special version of Old Durham Town to mark the occasion – see below

On Monday we head to Broughton at the Airbus factory, then Tarpoley and Rugby in the evening.

On Tuesday we are thinking about Worcester and Hereford, but need support to complete this journey

Hope to see you at one of these events.

Then we’re back on to building a viable opposition to encourage our politicians to show a little backbone.

“Magic Bus” by The Who from “Live at Leeds” seems to sum today rather well … Where is the £350 million every week for the NHS? Boris’ £3 billion is just 8 weeks of the promised support on the magic bus …