People ask me about the thinking behind the “Britastrophe” stickers from EU Flag Mafia. I took some time to design the slogan way back in March and a quick look behind the scenes reveals the thinking:
Brexit is a long term disaster in slow motion. Because of the long term nature of Brexit and the slow motion aspect, people have tended to discount the impacts or deny them as project fear. Following 1000’s of hours of on the street conversations with Brexiteers, I find that the vast majority of these people are not long range planners or strategic thinkers. They think in the here and now and tend to believe that you cannot plan for the future. Que sera sera is their modus operandi for long range planning.
However, Corona is very much in the here and now. Brexiteers recognise the impacts as they are very much within their “lived experience”. As I pointed out some 5 months ago, Corona has given us the one thing that Brexit never could. A realistic preview of Brexit, where toilet roll is currency, chicken drumsticks are traded in dark alleyways and Pampers are on their third use.
People tend to compartmentalise issues and we needed to make the connection between Corona and Brexit. In doing so we brought the short and long term together in a potent mixture. We initially tested this out on the street with my bicycle hoarding and then with the stickers.
In terms of sequencing the strapline, a catastrophe is bigger than a crisis or a disaster, hence the catchphrase Corona Crisis + Brexit Disaster = Britastrophe. Note the order and sequence and the use of the word Britain within the phrase. All the above must be done within as few words as possible for busy people, five in this case or three for the short form version. “Britastrophe” also sounds like the kind of word that Boris Johnson would use, hence my choice of a unique word to describe the combined effect.
I am deeply aware that people do not analyse stickers for any length of time but it’s important that we get our message across concisely and clearly.
Get your “Britastrophe” stickers at EU Flag Mafia. You may also enjoy their Bollocks to Brexit Facemasks … the best way to protect yourself from Brexit in the shops!
I am constantly reminded by Remainers on social media that Brexit is done. There’s nothing we can do about it, and we should shut up and accept Brexit. Although I find this daily capitulation to Johnson’s Neville Chamberlain moment deeply depressing, I have decided to take their words seriously as I’m tired of fighting a war on two fronts. So here I’m setting out the reasons why No Deal (also known as an Australian deal) Brexit is a much better outcome for Britain than any other Brexit deal.
We already know the impossibility of securing a good Brexit deal from four years of vacillation and nonsense from our government in terms of economic, social and political outcomes. Theresa May’s Brexit deal was the high-water mark of Brexit and everything else has been a degradation of what could be said to be Brexit. Even Jacob Rees-Mogg and the ERG have derided recent Brexit proposals from David Frost as not being a true Brexit, positioning themselves in order to avoid responsibility for the Brexit monstrosity that they created.
In any case, No Deal and the most likely Johnson Brexit deal are not very far apart in terms of the economic and social costs. Already Brexiteers are saying that the Brexit on offer will not be a real Brexit. This is rather like arguing about whether the real IRA was better than the Provisional IRA. This shapeshifting by the Brexit antagonists mitigates against securing a Brexit deal of any kind. Experts predict that the impact of Brexit will be a sustained loss of between 5-7% GDP over 10 years, compounded by COVID losses. The word “Britastrophe” has been coined to describe the combined impact of Corona crisis + Brexit disaster. Remember, it only took 3.5% loss of GDP to give us the 2008 crash. Imagine the exponential impact of Corona + Brexit on lives and livelihoods?
A No Deal Brexit is the most likely Brexit to help us regain an entry to the EU. Two to three months of abject chaos on the streets through food shortages, supply chain breakages, tariffs, delays, queues at borders, gridlocking of Kent and so on should be enough to bring Brexit Britain to its knees. Of course, there is no guarantee that the EU would let us re rejoin at this point, although they have kept their powder dry on this matter, unlike our testosterone filled bloated Prime Minister. Nonetheless, a No Deal Brexit offers us the quickest shortest sharp shock to Britain, whereas a Brexit deal simply delays the “boiling of the British frog”. Note that no frogs were injured in the making of this video.
Why then is a Brexit deal worse than No Deal I hear you ask? Well simply this. A Brexit deal will mean waiting 5 to 10 years to rejoin the EU whilst we “try the Brexit experiment”. Brexiteers will argue that it took 5 years to get Brexit done so we should at least allow 5 years minimum to try it out. When Remainers talk about rejoining the EU, they seem to forget that we would rejoin on a completely different basis than the current state of the United Kingdom. It is quite likely that Scotland will have left the UK within 5 years. It’s also quite plausible that Northern Ireland will be on the way to reunification with Ireland. Wales will probably join in the contagion of countries wishing to leave broken Britain and possibly even Cornwall. I said as a joke at No 10 Downing Street in 2017 that Britain would be reduced to the people’s republic of Thurrock. An exaggeration? Yes, but also containing certain grains of truth.
At the same time, the economic state of Britain will not be the same. Company departures, realignment of business models such as JLR, BMW, Toyota, Nissan, Airbus, Honda, HSBC, Santander and total relocations away from Brexit Britain could likely mean that the UK does not even meet the criteria to rejoin the EU. At the same time, the experience of Britain’s aggressive approach to Brexit will undoubtedly harden the EU’s view on our potential to rejoin without conditions, such as the adoption of the Schengen zone, the use of the euro as a currency etc. I would not want us back, so why would Brussels?
“Don’t be so pessimistic Peter”. I hear you say. “You are one of those doomsayers”. OK, I hear you. Perhaps you are right, so let’s be positive.
By September / October, it is quite likely that there will be severe unemployment, once the protective umbrella of furloughing is removed by “Dishy Rishi” Sunak, aka Mr “Whatever it takes”. At the same time, we are likely to be into a second Corona wave by then, given that the R rate in England is now at 1.00 or above, thanks to Tim Witherspoon and his ilk for insisting that pubs must be opened. I predict severe social unrest as people reach the bottom of their Maslow triangles. Mr “No Plan Johnson” has no plan for this. There are simply not enough police officers and army officers available to deal with mass civil unrest. What happens then? Is this positive enough for you?
We cannot rely on an opposition to help suspend Brexit. Sir Keir Starmer is lovely, but he is also playing the long game of waiting for this Government to fail. Labour are also embroiled in their own internal battles of anti-semitism and wokeness at this time. We must do it ourselves. Here are some things to do:
Brexit is the product of “Parliamentary Paralysis”. We change parliamentary paralysis by influencing our MPs. We change the will of the people by writing to the newspapers and presenting the arguments. So, we need to target our MPs and we still need to target the general public to change minds. A “Brexorcism” takes skill patience and time. You can find out how to do these by reading the book “Let’s talk about BREX .. it”.
Here are the details of our marathon road trip from Islington to Old Durham Town … in the B*llocks to Brexit Mini. Please support the venture via Go Fund Me.
PRESS RELEASE
I’m gonna leave old Durham Town … to check my eyesight
The “B*llocks to Brexit” Mini Cooper known as “Johnson” is making an unprecedented historic trip from Dominic Cummings house in Islington to Durham under strict COVID-safe conditions, so that the driver Peter Cook can get his eyesight checked. Peter is taking the excursion from Islington to Barnard Castle for his wife’s birthday and will be stopping at a few beauty spots along the way. The trip, inspired by Dominic Cummings, has been arranged by EU Flag Mafia in conjunction with Rage Against The Brexit Machine, to highlight the problems of adding Corona crisis to Brexit disaster, creating a “Britastrophe”. We will be performing songs from our catalogue of anti-Brexit songs, including ‘Alo Vera – Brexit’s Comin’ ‘Ome and a Chas & Dave Cockney Brexit Knees Up.
11% loss in GDP from Corona, when added to 9% predicted loss from Brexit will make an exponential impact on jobs, lives and livelihoods of people in Britain. Johnson the Mini will make the journey in order to wake people up to the oncoming economic and social tsunami. We only needed 3.5% GDP loss to create the 2008 crash. Corona is a natural born crisis and we must endure it. However, we don’t need to add the man-made Brexit disaster to the mix.
“Johnson’s driver” Peter Cook is taking a four-year-old baby “Bobo” on this historic journey. Bobo has promised not to urinate for the entire trip, although the Mini will be making stops in Rugby, Manchester, North Yorkshire and Newcastle, also taking in Southampton, Dorset, Wiltshire and Kent in the coming weeks. For Baby Bobo, it is a UST (Urination Stamina Test).
“Rules are rules and we must stick to them for everyone’s safety, even if Johnson, Cummings, Farage, Jenrick, Half Cock Handcock and Papa Bojo choose not to”
The last time “Johnson” made an appearance on Britain’s roads, we were stopped by an Essex Traffic Policeman Smith, in a rage on the M25 motorway. PC Smith asked us to remove the signage on the car on the hard shoulder of the M25, putting the police officer and the passengers at risk of death. We are hoping to return to Essex to meet PC Smith for a cuppa. Smith has not been located by Essex Police some 8 months after we provided his full details to the force …
Peter hopes that “Dick and Dom” aka Boris and Dominic will hear our call that this is the worst time to take Brexit out of the microwave. If they checked their eyesight, they would now realise that there is a substantial gap in the will of the people, with nearly a ten-point gap of people now wishing to remain a member of the EU. All that is needed is courage and political will to change the oncoming “Britastrophe”.
“We must re-boot Britain in the wake of Corona. It’s time for our leaders to show true courage and take a bold move to build, build, build a Better Britain in a Better Europe for a Better World. To this end I have formed an unpolitical party to end all political parties. It’s time we had leaders that we could look up to and trust. Our movement is designed to help achieve that. I’m proud to work with EU Flag mafia to help put the great back in Britain.
p.s. We have just received a request to take “Johnson” to Greece to check our eyesight, via Bulgaria. We are just checking the logistics of the trip, although all seems well, since Stanley Johnson recently made a similar pilgrimage to check on a holiday let.
For an exclusive interview on our “Unprecedented Ocular Pilgrimage” around the UK, please contact Peter Cook, Brexorcist in Chief on 07725 927585 peter@academy-of-rock.co.uk
We were part of the farmer’s march in London yesterday. I experienced the bizarre spectacle of following a load of vegetables who were marching on parliament to a load of … er … vegetables. Our vegetables were fresh, alive, full of vitamins and so on, whereas the Westminster crop are genetically modified with its leader hormone infested …
See Farming Today for an account of our day in Parliament.
We also did a piece of media coverage about Dominic Cummings at his house in Islington for the Ham and High. We spoke with one of his neighbours who demonstrated the “English condition” in terms of not wishing to speak ill of his neighbours. Instead, he spoke of the Cummings child and how nice Mary Wakefield is. I imagine people said the same of Eva Braun … “Englishness” is responsible for three losses – the referendum and two elections. Vote Leave did not have the same regard for the law or everything in moderation. We must not copy Vote Leave but we must better them.
We next move on to the West Country at the weekend. Starting early on Saturday am, we will visit Stonehenge at sunrise for photos, then on to Salisbury, Blandford Forum and Dorchester. Then a tour of the Dorset coast – Bournemouth, Poole, Weymouth etc.
On Sunday we head to Wiltshire with places like Cricklade, Devizes, Chippenham and Swindon in mind.
If you wish to host the car with a static or mobile pop up event, please call me to arrange 07725 927585. We will perform some music in each location.
