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50 Shades of Sue Grey

50 Shades of Gray

Updated on date by author

I had a curious encounter with Kevin Gray on Linkedin the other day. Kevin is CEO of Bath Building Society and, as such, I expected a degree of skill not available to the average soul. Kevin was responding to a post about Nicola Sturgeon’s leadership skills and the SNP in general. It transpired that Kevin does not like the SNP, Nicola Sturgeon or Scottish Independence although he is a Scot in England. Not unsurprisingly, Kevin also likes Brexit. But quite surprisingly, given his position as CEO, he had swallowed some of Boris Johnson’s lies. The transcript of the dialogue that follows illustrates just how pervasive the Dunning-Kruger effect is and especially so when one tries to change someone’s mind using online media. This BBC post was the initial trigger for Kevin’s outburst at Nicola. She rightly pointed out that Boris Johnson’s preoccupations with getting Brexit done, childbirth, ovens, fridges etc. had made a considerable impact on Britain’s ability to focus on the pandemic. I have left Kevin’s remarks unchecked in purple. My replies are in red. The entire conversation is exactly as it emerged on Linkedin. No editing etc. Simply reportage.

Kevin’s initial reaction was : “Hhhmmmm. Not so sure about that. If there was one example of where Brexit did actually help anyone it was in allowing the uk goverment to move quickly with the vaccine taskforce and deliver mass vacination ahead of EU states. I suspect Devolution did not help however. Having x4 parliaments/assemblies to deal with in the UK must surely have slowed up the response? Much as Nicola was a great politician, I would personally not give too much air time to any nationalist whose aim is only to deliver further and much more serious division in the UK.”

Given Kevin’s senior position, I felt no need to hold back and I replied thus:

“I’m afraid this is incorrect Kevin. We could always have done this as an EU member. The truth will come out in the COVID inquiry. Do remember that the vaccine was developed by foreign scientists. In desperation, Johnson used buying power to snaffle up the supplies. Speaking as a scientist, I must remind you of the short-sightedness of stockpiling medicines in a GLOBAL pandemic. This strategy sprang from Johnson’s desire to mask Brexit carnage with the COVID cover up. The result was a “Britastrophe”. Please check with scientific facts if you don’t believe me.” 

To cheer him up and keep it a bit lighter I sent him a copy of the song I wrote in 2020 to epitomise the word Britastrophe:

Kevin was undeterred :

“Don’t get me wrong… we were ill prepared for the pandemic and the preps and early actions were inadequate. I’m pretty sure the enquiry will recognise that. Nevertheless, I’m pretty happy that early political action to stockpile and make early orders might have protected my friends, family, neighbours and their relations and friends in the UK. When it comes to avoiding death of my loved ones…I’m happy to jump the waiting list. We steal nurses from the third world ‘day in day out’ for the NHS so no new low standard applied there. I can’t see how being in the EU would have made a positive difference to the outcome for the UK quite frankly. I also think that SNP will find any cause to justify further separation, angst and years of pain in these islands that will be far worse than any political split from the EU. Some of us are Scots with families divided by politics on this matter. The SNP have hardly covered themselves in glory with their running of the NHS in Scotland for oh so many years after all. Now… an EU wide future plan including with the UK involved would make a lot of sense.”

I decided to challenge the basis of his competence. I am quite sure that Kevin is a competent CEO of a building society, but not so sure about this matter of science :

“Kevin, I imagine that you are NOT a biologist, epidemiologist or similar. As I said, your first statement was demonstrably wrong and the stockpiling of medicines is not a victimless crime. I’m quite disappointed that a CEO can have so little systemic thinking.”

Kevin defended himself again : “We sadly live in an imperfect world where states do not have equal resources or peoples have access to the same levels of health care. I agree that stockpiling vaccine was not victimless but the NHS holds drug stockpiles as part of their business as usual. British citizens benefit from the NHS hiring foreign health workers, often at the expense of others’ health care. It’s not right… but the primary duty of the UK government is to protect UK citizens. Same elsewhere. The UK government was following the preps for the wrong pandemic and clearly failed to implement lockdown as quickly as it should have. They failed to see what had worked in Asia to control SARS. That undoubtedly cost lives. I still cannot see what difference being in the EU would have made though. Happy to be put right on that point. The seeds of our slow initial response were sown decades ago. The next pandemic could be far worse so let’s hope the learning is swift.”

I decided at this point to put some external expert support from a Government source and offered him a way out of his fake news and an opportunity to ‘kiss and make up’ online :

“Kevin. Please read full fact : COVID and Brexit. Now you may correct the record on here. People believe fake news so please add a fact check to your original post.

‘Wrong pandemic’ – coughs … 🙂 I won’t embarrass you further on here but you are welcome to an online leaders’ debate.

Re your point ‘Some of us are Scots with families divided by politics on this matter.’ I can help you with the family healing issue. Read my book on Rebooting Britain.

You made two further points : ‘They failed to see what had worked in Asia to control SARS. That undoubtedly cost lives.’

This was not so much a failure, which implies accidental ignorance. This was wilful ignorance. Johnson and Hancock deliberately put infected patients into care homes due to the false narrative of herd immunity and a non-existent protective ring. This cost 40 000 unnecessary deaths. As regards Johnson’s level of attention and focus on the problem, this image sums up his leadership skills in this area :

Brexit Too Little, Too Late
Johnson’s dithering cost lives.

You also said ‘When it comes to avoiding death of my loved ones…I’m happy to jump the waiting list. We steal nurses from the third world ‘day in day out’ for the NHS so no new low standard applied there.’

This too is a false equivalence. I won’t bore you with the details but it is one of Jacob Rees-Mogg’s skills. To learn more read the book. Both situations are deplorable (poaching foreign nationals and stockpiling drugs in a pandemic), but they are NOT equivalent.”

By this time I thought Kevin was probably looking for an equitable way out of the matter, having perhaps wished he had never begun this encounter. He used the well-worn Brexiter phrase in an attempt to find something we could agree about:

Kevin : “Well everyone is entitled to their own opinion. I hope we can agree on that. The truth will out in the end and I’m sure that we may all be enlightened. I’m pretty sure that we can also agree that it won’t be 100 years before the next pandemic.”

I’m afraid I could not let this false equivalence pass for peace either :

“Kevin. Facts trump opinions I’m afraid. When they are put in the scales of truth, facts outweigh opinions.

But you are most welcome to join me on a leader’s debate on ZOOM at your convenience with an invited audience on “Brexit Futures”.

Human intervention has probably guaranteed that it will not be 100 years until another health crisis, possibly fungal and far more problematic, but nonetheless, Brexit will have a deeper impact on lives and livelihoods in the long term than COVID has, save for those killed by Johnson’s careless care home strategy, for which there is no way back for them.

The Brexit impact films are worth a look – all fact checked.”

At this point, Kevin ran away as they often do. I would draw some lessons out from this dialogue ….

Lessons learned

Brexiteers can come from anywhere. Even CEOs and intellectually bright are susceptible to illusions about Brexit. This merely confirms that Brexit is a religion / ideology and we must use strategies that address beliefs and identity change rather than the usual toolkit.

The lies put forward by Brexiteers have been installed like permafrost on some people’s minds. I very much doubt that Kevin is stupid. I imagine he can count money, but maybe not microbes or viruses.

The Dunning-Kruger effect is powerful when a figure of authority is challenged online where position power counts for nothing. I gave Kevin several levels of expertise to help him revise his view that Brexit had helped the COVID vaccine delivery programme but he stuck to his previously held beliefs.

Online Brexorcisms are always problematic. See the reasons why in this extract from Reboot Britain below.

That said, other people watch these online interactions and stay silent. They are sometimes more important than the other person in the conversation. Kevin made himself and his company look pretty daft in this interaction.

I doubt I will be getting a Christmas card from The Bath Building Society … oddly enough Bath voted to Remain. I wonder if some of the good people of Bath are reviewing their local building societies …

Online Brexorcisms
Read the book by clicking the extract.

Posted in Boris Johnson, Brexit, Brexorcism, Corona, Democracy, Education, Europe, Leadership, Politics | Tagged , , , , , | 4 Replies
The Daily Maul

Brexit Boom & BUSST

Updated on date by author

Our latest edition of the Daily Maul covers the massive litter tray of dead cats generated by Boris Johnson, Liz Truss, Rishi Sunakered and Nadine Dorries. This in the wake of Johnson’s long overdue fall from grace for killing 30 000 people unnecessarily and giving us an oven burned bungled Brexit. Please see our fact and fiction checker to tell the difference between facts and fictions in our edition of the Maul. Grab a copy of Private Eyelines for more of this stuff. Fight fascism with satire – the one thing they cannot take away from us.

The Daily Maul
Click on a dead cat to read Private Eyelines.

HARD FACTS

FACT : Liz Truss went on GB News (Gammon Balderdash News) last night, appearing to forget that she supported Remain in 2016. Her parents have disowned her. The kids must be next. Although she has not formed the BUSS (Boris-Truss) party, stranger things have happened. The Truss is out on manoeuvres to kill little Rishi Sunak along with Mad Nads and some other Tories.

Truss amnesia.

FACT : Boris Johnson was found guilty of lying repeatedly by a committee comprised mainly of his own party members. No amount of gaslighting or dead cattery can cover this up. Read the Select Committee report.

FACT : Boris Johnson started new job as Daily Mail columnist the day after the Select Committee (aka Kangaroo court) report found he lied repeatedly to Parliament. They have clearly picked the right man to lie for them. This itself is another breach of the Ministerial Code. His first report concerns the vitally unimportant fact that he takes drugs to stop him raiding the fridge at night for cheese and chorizo. He needs really to take drugs to stop his infatuation with fridges …

The Daily Maul
The real Daily Maul. Click to read the satire version.

FACT : Boom and Brexit Busted : Mark Carnage reports on Brexit Carnage and its effects on inflation in the Telegraph. YES, the Telegraph !! There was no Boris Brexit Boom. Carney was former Bank of England chief.

Click on the image to read the ‘Telegravda’.



FACT : Jacob Rees-Mogg and the other few remaining nutters on the deck of the SS Brexit are now calling for the removal of our sovereignty. Sovereignty was the very thing that they said we had to have back as the main reason for Brexit. This by the genius Cold War Steve:

Click to see Cold War Steve’s work.

FACT : Rishi Sunak has resorted to wearing brown boots that are nearly bigger than his torso in order to look like a ‘hard man’. Caught smiling on camera whilst the police raided a home yesterday in the traditional racist smirk pioneered by Priti Patel and gold-plated by Suella Braverman.

Sunakered
Behind a painted smile ….

Click to stop Johnson’s honour’s list

PULP FICTION

FICTION : The Truss and Johnson have not formed a new political party or had political intercourse, as far as we know.

FICTION : RIshi Sunak’s brown boots have not made him more or less racist. Just the standard amount or racism. Nor has little Rishi lost 3 inches in stature whilst playing Call of Duty. It was Liz Truss who was the shortest (lived) Prime Minister in history as this clip from James O’Brien on LBC shows.

FICTION : As far as we know, Boris Johnson has not ordered Carrie to deliver a new baby on Monday as a distraction when Parliament vote to accept the Select Committee report. Nor has Nadine Dorris moved back into nursing, or delivered a Cesarian section. However, if I were Carrie, I would not let Mad Nads near her.

From Mad Nad’s attic – the wonderful work of Cold War Steve.

Future directions for activism

Our efforts must now concentrate on four areas:

Changing Labour’s attitude to Brexit. See Hard Labour.

Continuing to move the dial in leave voters’ minds. See Strategies for Brexorcism.

Picking Remainers who are suffering from learned helplessness up off the floor. See Scottish Bylines.

Making the case for Rejoin more vigorously. See Strategies to Rejoin the EU.

Read Scottish Bylines

Read more : Go Nads

Read more : Brexit and geopolitics

Join us at BBC Question Time in Clacton Thu 22 June.
Live pictures from the Select Committee as taken by Nadine Dorries.

Posted in Boris Johnson, Brexit, Brexorcism, Britain, Britastrophe, Democracy, Elections, Liz Truss, Partygate, Rejoin EU, Sovereignty, Sunak | Tagged , , , , , | 3 Replies
COVID memorial wall

Johnson’s revenge

Updated on date by author

In the wake of Rishi Sunak’s attempts to cover up the COVID inquiry, I spoke with Marina Purkiss about ‘Johnson’s revenge’ on Rishi Sunak. Marina asked whether Boris Johnson is playing a blinder with his recent offer to release notebooks and WhatsApp messages to the COVID inquiry? And just how much of a threat do people think Johnson is to Sunak? Listen to my dialogue with Marina here:

Marina Purkiss on LBC - Johnson's revenge
Click on the image to listen to the interview with Marina on LBC

If I were charged with murdering 30 000 people and asked to go to court, would it be agreeable if I were to dictate what evidence was submitted to that court?

I am divided. A tiny bit of me wants to expose Johnson. I said jokingly that at least we would know how many kids he had! Yet the issues we face as a country are far more important than taking revenge on any one person or any reproductive trivia. At least 30 000 vulnerable people died unnecessarily at the hands of Johnson, Hancock et al. The truth must be heard and justice done. This is not a Philip Schofield styled media fest, it is a serious matter. So here’s how I see Johnson’s intervention and timing:

Johnson’s revenge imperative

Johnson is a single celled organism – with one simple metric for his decisions – what is good for Boris Johnson. This will be guiding his decision to release the information to the inquiry. I sense that he thinks that he will gain first mover advantage over Sunak by acting now. Remember that strategy according to Johnson is what appears on the front pages of the Daily Mail etc. the day after he opens his mouth.

Johnson is also a reliable liar. The devil is always in the detail and, at present, Johnson has only offered to release WhatsApp messages from his current phone, from mid 2021. Many of the important decisions on herd immunity, putting infected patients into care homes etc. were made in 2020. Another piece of fudge has since been introduced … that his old phone must not be restarted, as it may release information to hackers … there are plenty of solutions to this problem such as Faraday cages. Experts judge the risks to be extremely low anyway. As always with Johnson, I smell a rat.

Boris Johnson's choices
Let’s remember it’s about political choices, not parties or personalities.

Johnson the disruptor

I seriously doubt Johnson’s ability to construct a coherent plan to replace Sunak, mainly because detailed planning is not Johnson’s forte and, in any case, the situation is complex and fluid. However, Johnson is a disruptor and an opportunist. Accordingly, I favour the idea that he has done this simply to create chaos and then hope to profit from what emerges. Johnson’s sense of hubris and supremacy may well make him think that he can replace Sunak and comeback for a glorious second term. However, I find myself in agreement with Ian Dale who also appeared on the programme. Johnson has had a toxic effect on his party and his star is fading fast compared with 2019 when he lied to ‘get Brexit done’ by putting it in a microwave oven, gas mark 4.

The Tory party is also ruthless once someone is of no further use to them. As such, I suspect that analysts and advisors have gamed the various Johnson renaissance scenarios on electoral success. The COVID issue also changed everything. 30 000 unnecessary deaths arising from Johnson’s deliberate act of putting infected COVID patients into care homes, based on Dominic Cummings’ obsession with herd immunity. Alternative choices were available.

Dying for Boris - Johnson's revenge
Are you Dying for Boris? Download our Russian inspired piece of music and support our work by clicking the image.

Wishful thinking

I confess that I want Johnson back in power. In case you think that I’m losing my mind, let me explain. Johnson has never taken responsibility for anything in his life. His return as PM would mean he would have to take responsibility for the impact of Brexit and COVID. Rishi Sunak dodges responsibility for both, as they were not his doing. But I very much doubt I’ll get my wish via Johnson’s revenge. We’ll have to settle the matter through the courts and via elections if the British people will not rise up to say that ‘Enough is Enough’.

Sign the petition – release all the WhatsApp messages

Johnson’s revenge : Sunakered

Johnson’s revenge will strike a hammer blow to Sunak. Whether it is a knock out blow remains to be seen. It is entirely fair for Baroness Hallett to see the evidence and for her and her team to decide what is relevant and what irrelevant. After all, that is their job as professionals. They will want to decide how well decisions were made and how COVID was prioritised against other goals. We already know that medical evidence was not at the top of the charts from recent releases. Johnson preferred to meet members of the right wing press to discuss newspaper headlines and sales over scientists, statisticians and sages. This is the wrong prioritisation.

Boris Johnson's priorities - Media, media, media
Johnson’s COVID strategy : Science unimportant, right wing media relations priceless.

Imagine being charged of a crime but insisting that the judge and jury must NOT see the evidence !!

Opening the chamber of secrets

The possible reasons why Rishi Sunak does not want the COVID inquiry fit into two categories : internal combustion and external corruption.

Internal combustion : The WhatsApp trails may reveal a dysfunctional web of relationships with media, COVID party plans, lying to the Queen and avoidable deaths from Rishi Sunak’s “Eat out to help out” scheme. Worst of all, it may expose the blood letting that comes from the chronic internecine warfare inside the Tory party. Some of this may be considered irrelevant information. However, if the balance of internal combustion : focusing on the pandemic is such that decisions were missed, avoided or delayed, such information would rightly be considered as relevant. The strain on Tory party cohesion may be impossible to endure. This may explain Sunak’s attempt to try to bury the COVID inquiry.

External corruption. We may learn how pub landlords were considered to be competent players in the PPE game, when existing medical device companies were ignored. We may also learn more about the £37 billion spaffed on PPE which did not work. Then Russian involvement in Brexit. How COVID was used to mask Brexit carnage. How the Tories briefed the media to feed the public various messages … and so on.

Sunak has now threatened Johnson with the removal of taxpayer funding for his court case. This would seem to indicate that Sunak has something to hide. Of course, the taxpayer should not be funding his court costs, but that’s an entirely separate matter which we are addressing via a petition. Meanwhile Johnson continues to lie in order to save himself.

The COVID inquiry must go ahead unhindered

Lest we forget : An example of Johnson’s word salad on the disastrous Australian Brexit trade deal.

Join us on Wed 7th June 8 pm on ZOOM

From the vault : Tory Brexit Scum

Please subscribe to Reboot Britain – it’s free

Posted in Boris Johnson, Brexit, Britain, Britastrophe, Corona, Democracy, Sunak | Tagged , , , | 4 Replies
The Son

Fun Loving Criminals

Updated on date by author

In this roundup of what could be euphemistically called fun loving criminals, I make some unemotional comparisons of people who should be in jail for crimes against humanity with Rolf Harris. Without excusing Harris for his crimes, it is fair to say that Boris Johnson, Liz Truss, Priti Patel, Kwasi Kwarteng, Suella Braverman, Jacob Rees-Mogg, Nigel Farage, Matt Hancock, Dominic Cummings et al. have done more damage to young people’s lives, through their decisions on Brexit, Brexonomics, immigration and COVID. Why then are they not in prison?

Brexit is a crime scene

The impact of Brexit is already evident across all the STEEPLE factors: Sociological, Technological, Economic, Environmental, Political, Legal and Ethical. See our articles on the impacts at Scottish Bylines and Biz Catalyst 360. The costs of all of these STEEPLE factors are one thing, but if they were to be offset greatly by Brexit benefits which outweigh the costs, then Brexit will have been worth it. However, no Brexit benefits have accrued so far, nor are any on the horizon, apart from some flaky notions of ‘freedom’. See our article on Brexit freedoms for a full list of these so-called freedoms.

Economic, environmental and social damage from Brexit ultimately impact people’s lives and livelihoods. Accordingly, the perpetrators of these crimes must therefore be locked up as a bare minimum. Their crimes are more significant than Harris’ heinous crimes, however hard that might be to hear. And the impacts will become even more pronounced as Brexit reveals its full horrors. Sure, Boris Johnson seems like a loveable rogue, but he is not a fun loving criminal, just a pound shop thief.

Trussonomics

Liz Truss and Kwasi Kwarteng put young people’s hopes of home ownership into the deep freeze with their cocaine fuelled experiment on the nation called ‘Trussonomics‘. In just one weekend, Truss and Kwarteng took £70 BILLION off the UK balance sheet. OK, it’s only money, but such things have significant impacts on lives and livelihoods. I pay my taxes so that our politicians can make careful decisions about macro-economics. I don’t expect them to behave like gamblers in a casino on smack, crackle and pop. Accordingly, Kemi Badenoch, Jacob Rees-Mogg and Penny Morduant are also key players in destroying the value of Britain through their bungled Brexit decisions.

Wreckers of lives and livelihoods

Child killers

Suella Braverman and Priti Patel’s time as Home Secretaries have made Theresa May’s hostile environment look like a trip to a Butlins’ holiday camp. It is not something to be proud of to dream of children being deported to Rwanda. And better alternatives are available. See our two minute answer to immigration below.

Immigration sorted in just two minutes

Immigration has failed over 13 years. Brexit did not deliver

and Rishi Sunackered is simply too weak to sack Braverman, as our micro film in this tweet shows:

Sunakered – Feat James O’Brien

COVID killers

Boris Johnson and Matt Hancock’s decision to put infected COVID patients into care homes had an estimated impact of 30 000 unnecessary deaths. In case you are wondering, this was a political CHOICE and not a necessity. Their decision was based on Dominic Cummings’ obsession with the idea of herd immunity. This again is a crime for which no punishment has been administered to date.

Instead, Matt Hancock got £400 000 on ‘I’m a Celebrity’. Michelle Mone and Dido Harding disappeared with hundreds of thousands of pounds from dodgy PPE contracts. Boris Johnson escaped to go on the conference circuit and Cummings scarpered from the crime scene having driven to Barnard Castle to check his eyesight.

Dying for Boris – find the album at https://academy-of-rock.bandcamp.com/

Partygate is one thing, but 30 000 avoidable deaths another thing altogether. Here’s today’s edition of ‘The Son’ – Populist Political Papers Parodied:

The Son - Click the image to read Private Eyelines on Amazon.
The Son – Click the image to read Private Eyelines on Amazon.

These are not fun loving criminals, they are professional crooks. In the words of Donald Trump:

LOCK THEM UP

Posted in Boris Johnson, Brexit, Brexorcism, Britain, Britastrophe, Democracy, Education, Ethics, Farage, Hancock, Immigration, Jacob Rees-Mogg, Liz Truss, NHS, Partygate, Racism, Sunak | Tagged , , , | Leave a reply

Later with Jools Holland

Updated on date by author

Today we visited Cooling Castle, home of Jools Holland with the Bollocks to Brexit Mini Cooper. Here is a report from our resident maritime consultant and Brexit sea dog Don.

At Cooling Castle

I arrived at the rendezvous at 5 bells in the Afternoon Watch. That is 14.30 for landlubbers and when the big hand is on the six and the little hand is on the two for Gammons and Tories. My fellow Saboteurs came separately. For those who have not been paying attention “Saboteur” is the term of derision that Gammons and Tories chose to refer to decent people who oppose Brexit. The term quickly fell out of favour in Gammon and Tory circles when we pointed out that “Saboteur” was what Vichyites called the French Resistance. Comparing me to the French Resistance is about the nicest thing anybody ever said about me. I took it as a compliment: Vive les Saboteurs! “Vive la Resistance” Merde a Brexit!

Alo’ Vera – Brexit’s Comin’ ‘Ome

The Bulwarks to Brexitmobile led the convoy and we drove around the environs. We set up a stall in Gillingham High Street near the church and our musical director set up his gear and serenaded us with anti-Brexit music. I chose a spot where I could keep a look out for Gammons, Tories and nobbled coppers. We did not hand out leaflets for social distancing reasons. I saw somebody advance purposefully towards our musical director. I thought I might be needed but I did the newcomer an injustice. He wanted to get involved. Took a couple of our flags and joined in the fun.

Nigel Farage’s Garage – one of the songs we performed on the street

A few people gave filthy looks and made vulgar gestures then moved on quickly. For the most part people were supportive, gave the thumbs up and wanted to photograph us. After a while we set off for Rochester. It was much the same there. Some people walked off pointedly refusing to look at us while others gave the thumbs up. By this time my old knee injury was playing up so I decided to call it a day. I can walk for miles and feel better for it but standing around plays havoc with my old injuries.

People in Ashford are unhappy about recent developments. It has sunk in that Brexit is going to cause delays at Customs so this hopeless inept government is setting up a huge lorry park for stranded trade vehicles. The site had been chosen for a new Amazon facility that would have provided employment. Instead they are going to get trucks belching diesel fumes because the drivers will need to run the engines to keep refrigeration plants working. That will not improve the atmosphere at all. This is not the earthly paradise that the people of East Kent thought they would get when they voted for Brexit.

The Brexit Mindset summed up

Tomorrow we go to Tunbridge Wells on a circular tour starting at 11.00:

Route will include London Rd, High St, Sainsbury car park, Mt Pleasant, Town Hall,  Monson Rd, Camden Rd, Powdermill Lane, Southboro High St. Then back down St John’s Rd, Mt Ephraim Rd, brief stop at Victoria Place, back up Lime Hill to London Rd.

There remains a possibility to visit Hythe and East Kent later on tomorrow

Posted in Brexit, Corona, Cummings, NHS, Politics | Tagged , , , , | 1 Reply

Cummings Road Trip for eyesight tests

Updated on date by author

Here are the details of our marathon road trip from Islington to Old Durham Town … in the B*llocks to Brexit Mini. Please support the venture via Go Fund Me.

Find more like this in Private Eyelines – Click image to view on Amazon

PRESS RELEASE

I’m gonna leave old Durham Town … to check my eyesight

The “B*llocks to Brexit” Mini Cooper known as “Johnson” is making an unprecedented historic trip from Dominic Cummings house in Islington to Durham under strict COVID-safe conditions, so that the driver Peter Cook can get his eyesight checked.  Peter is taking the excursion from Islington to Barnard Castle for his wife’s birthday and will be stopping at a few beauty spots along the way.  The trip, inspired by Dominic Cummings, has been arranged by EU Flag Mafia in conjunction with Rage Against The Brexit Machine, to highlight the problems of adding Corona crisis to Brexit disaster, creating a “Britastrophe”.  We will be performing songs from our catalogue of anti-Brexit songs, including ‘Alo Vera – Brexit’s Comin’ ‘Ome and a Chas & Dave Cockney Brexit Knees Up.

11% loss in GDP from Corona, when added to 9% predicted loss from Brexit will make an exponential impact on jobs, lives and livelihoods of people in Britain.  Johnson the Mini will make the journey in order to wake people up to the oncoming economic and social tsunami.  We only needed 3.5% GDP loss to create the 2008 crash.  Corona is a natural born crisis and we must endure it.  However, we don’t need to add the man-made Brexit disaster to the mix.

I coined the phrase Britastrophe in the bath

“Johnson’s driver” Peter Cook is taking a four-year-old baby “Bobo” on this historic journey.  Bobo has promised not to urinate for the entire trip, although the Mini will be making stops in Rugby, Manchester, North Yorkshire and Newcastle, also taking in Southampton, Dorset, Wiltshire and Kent in the coming weeks.  For Baby Bobo, it is a UST (Urination Stamina Test).

“Rules are rules and we must stick to them for everyone’s safety, even if Johnson, Cummings, Farage, Jenrick, Half Cock Handcock and Papa Bojo choose not to”

The last time “Johnson” made an appearance on Britain’s roads, we were stopped by an Essex Traffic Policeman Smith, in a rage on the M25 motorway.  PC Smith asked us to remove the signage on the car on the hard shoulder of the M25, putting the police officer and the passengers at risk of death.  We are hoping to return to Essex to meet PC Smith for a cuppa.  Smith has not been located by Essex Police some 8 months after we provided his full details to the force …

Peter hopes that “Dick and Dom” aka Boris and Dominic will hear our call that this is the worst time to take Brexit out of the microwave.  If they checked their eyesight, they would now realise that there is a substantial gap in the will of the people, with nearly a ten-point gap of people now wishing to remain a member of the EU.  All that is needed is courage and political will to change the oncoming “Britastrophe”.   

“We must re-boot Britain in the wake of Corona.  It’s time for our leaders to show true courage and take a bold move to build, build, build a Better Britain in a Better Europe for a Better World.  To this end I have formed an unpolitical party to end all political parties.  It’s time we had leaders that we could look up to and trust.  Our movement is designed to help achieve that.  I’m proud to work with EU Flag mafia to help put the great back in Britain.

3 Dec 2019 – London, UK – Minis in Essex Street, London in a stunt organised and crowdfunded by anti-brexit campaigning group EU Flag Mafia. Click on the image to connect with the Mafia.

p.s.  We have just received a request to take “Johnson” to Greece to check our eyesight, via Bulgaria.  We are just checking the logistics of the trip, although all seems well, since Stanley Johnson recently made a similar pilgrimage to check on a holiday let.

For an exclusive interview on our “Unprecedented Ocular Pilgrimage” around the UK, please contact Peter Cook, Brexorcist in Chief via peter@academy-of-rock.co.uk

Posted in Brexit, Corona, Cummings, Gutter Press, Politics | Tagged , , , , | Leave a reply

Every breath he takes

Updated on date by author

I’m gonna leave old Durham Town … to check my eyesight – 06 July

The “B*llocks to Brexit” Mini Cooper known as “Johnson” is making an unprecedented historic trip to Durham under strict COVID-safe conditions, so that the driver can get his eyesight checked by taking an excursion to Barnard Castle for his wife’s birthday and stopping at a few beauty spots.  The trip, inspired by Dominic Cummings, has been arranged by EU Flag Mafia in conjunction with Rage Against The Brexit Machine, to highlight the problems of adding Corona crisis to Brexit disaster, creating a “Britastrophe”. 

11% loss in GDP from Corona, when added to 9% predicted loss from Brexit will make an exponential impact on jobs, lives and livelihoods of people in Britain.  Johnson the Mini will make the journey in order to wake people up to the oncoming economic and social tsunami.  We only needed 3.5% GDP loss to create the 2008 crash.  Corona is a natural born crisis and we must endure it.  However, we don’t need to add the man-made Brexit disaster to the mix.

A close up of a sign Description automatically generated

“Johnson’s driver” Peter Cook is taking a four-year-old baby “Bobo” on this historic journey.  Bobo has promised not to urinate for the entire trip, although the Mini will be making stops in Rugby, Manchester, North Yorkshire and Newcastle, also taking in Southampton, Dorset, Wiltshire and Kent in the coming weeks.  For Baby Bobo, it is a UST (Urination Stamina Test).

“Rules are rules and we must stick to them for everyone’s safety, even if Johnson, Cummings, Farage, Jenrick, Half Cock Handcock and Papa Bojo choose not to”

The last time “Johnson” made an appearance on Britain’s roads, we were stopped by an Essex Traffic Policeman Smith, in a rage on the M25 motorway.  PC Smith asked us to remove the signage on the car on the hard shoulder of the M25, putting the police officer and the passengers at risk of death.  We are hoping to return to Essex to meet PC Smith for a cuppa.  Smith has not been located by Essex Police some 8 months after we provided his full details to the force …

EU Flag Mafia are hoping that “Dick and Dom” aka Boris and Dominic will hear our call that this is the worst time to take Brexit out of the microwave.  If they checked their eyesight, they would now realise that there is a substantial gap in the will of the people, with nearly a ten-point gap of people now wishing to remain a member of the EU.  All that is needed is courage and political will to change the oncoming “Britastrophe”.  

“We must re-boot Britain in the wake of Corona.  It’s time for our leaders to show true courage and take a bold move to build, build, build a Better Britain in a Better Europe for a Better World.  To this end I have formed an unpolitical party to end all political parties.  It’s time we had leaders that we could look up to and trust.  Our movement is designed to help achieve that.  I’m proud to work with EU Flag mafia to help put the great back in Britain.

Peter Cook

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p.s.  We have just received a request to take “Johnson” to Greece to check our eyesight, via Bulgaria.  We are just checking the logistics of the trip, although all seems well, since Stanley Johnson recently made a similar pilgrimage to check on a holiday let.

For an exclusive interview on our “Unprecedented Ocular Pilgrimage” around the UK, please contact Peter Cook, Brexorcist in Chief on 07725 927585 peter@academy-of-rock.co.uk

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Clamp for Carers

Updated on date by author

It hardly seems to be a week ago since Boris Johnson was clapping for carers and the NHS. Just yesterday, it was revealed that NHS workers would have to pay for car parking and Boris Johnson blamed care homes for COVID deaths. Lest we forget, it was Johnson who was sending COVID patients to care homes to infect vulnerable people, whilst supplies of PPE were “in transit” for several weeks according to Matt “Halfcock” Hancock.

In an exclusive interview I interviewed an ancillary NHS worker who answered the call for COVID staff. She had been running a business but saw the call for help and responded to it. Amongst the astonishing trail of events are the following revelations:

She was not paid AT ALL for several months, as management told her that the system was being sorted out.

During that time HR reviewed her job and re-classified it at a lower grade, thus her pay was adjusted accordingly.

Now that she has been paid, they have not paid for weekend working, as “the system has not been updated”.

She has been told that she will get the sack if she has a coffee break at work on her long shifts. As a diabetic, this presents other health risks.

I asked if these were the work of incompetent local management or deliberate policy decisions. She is of the view that it is the latter. I also asked if this was just down to her trust or whether it is widespread. She says she knows others in other trusts with the same treatment so she presumes it to be widespread.

Will Johnson take responsibility for unnecessary deaths?

She now wonders why she bothered. So do I. Whilst Boris Johnson was minting coins and bonging bells, he should have been listening to scientists and experts.

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