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Boris Johnson in the stocks

Gammonite Balderdash News

Our weekly update from Brexit Balderdash de-Bunker Don Adamson from his Brexit Bunker buried in Barnsley. Don takes on GB News aka Gammon Balderdash News this week.

This week’s homework: 

One. Discuss the following statement – Daily Vile has made large numbers of staff redundant, Torygraph has called in the receivers, fewer and fewer people are watching Gammonite Balderdash News Cur James Dyson, Nigel Garbage, Dim Tim Wetherspoon, Ann Widdecombe. Rachel Johnson (sister of Satan’s Deputy) and 66% of Daily Express readers have stated that Brexit has gone horribly wrong. Meanwhile Keith Starmer insists he can ‘make Brexit work’ despite all the evidence to the contrary. Starmer is, essentially, giving us the same deceit and hypocrisy that Neo Nazi Tories and far left Trade Unionists have been giving us for years. Can Keith Starmer do what Neo Nazi Tories have failed to do?

Two: ‘Men without honour and women without virtue’ is a disparaging comment that has fallen into disuse because it is nowadays considered politically incorrect. For all that it may be out of step with the times it is a profoundly accurate way to describe the people who have inflicted this Brexit FUBAR on us. This is a good time for Johnson to go. He can quit politics secure in the knowledge that Keith Starmer is as hell bent on doing a Brexit FUBAR as the Tories are hell bent on doing a Brexit FUBAR. Tories got us into this mess by making promises they could not keep. Keith Starmer says he can get us out of this mess by repeating the same promises even though he knows full well that that these are promises that nobody can keep. In what way are Labour Party promises they cannot keep better than Tory Party promises they cannot keep? In what way is a Labour Party Brexit FUBAR better than a Tory Party Brexit FUBAR? In what way are Labour Party Brexit masturbation fantasies better than Tory Party Brexit masturbation fantasies? Why are we stuck with a ruling class that is hell bent on doing a FUBAR? 

Read Hard Labour

Three: In the language that Gammons, Flagshaggers and Tories speak the term ‘Move on’ is a euphemism for ‘Allow crimes to go unpunished.’ Why are Gammons, Flagshaggers and Tories so anxious to let crimes go unpunished? Similarly: Love Americans or hate those at least Federal Prosecutors have the brains, courage and decency to bring charges against Trump. Why is it that British prosecutors lack any kind of brains, courage and decency? 

Four: Torygraph has gone into receivership. Elon Musk has expressed an interest in buying it. Will this make the Torygraph more of a pack of lies or less of a pack of lies? 

The Torygraph. Return to sender. Click to read more.

Five. Rachel Johnson (sister of Satan’s Deputy). Recently commented that apart from Brexit and the Pandemic her adored brother got everything right. For the last three years Gammons and Flagshaggers have been telling us that they ‘Got the big calls right.’ Do we now understand that Brexit and the Pandemic are otherwise than ‘the big calls?’ 

Boris Johnson in the stocks
Boris Johnson in the stocks – Image by the brilliant James Rowland.

Read Brexit has failed

This week’s quotes: 


Richy Scumbag’s new ‘anti fraud champion’ Antony Brown…. accepted £5,000 … from Jeffrey Archer – one of the most notorious frauds in British political history…. Polyco Healthline’s Covid record … supplying more than a million counterfeit masks … bagged profits of £40M last year… Blame Matt Hancock … everything is his fault. We always knew that he was a useless idiot; which is why we made him health secretary…

Sexual harassment 

How did Nadine Dorries react when Johnson was accused of covering up repeated incidents of sexual harassment by Tory Whip Chris Pincher … Dorries defends Johnson … a man who thinks he is above the law and the standards the rest of us are held to… Rape has long had the lowest charging rate of all crimes…. in recent years a precipitous drop in the number of cases that make it to court … reports of rape have increased exponentially … 

Last year a senior Daily Mail journalist … sacked after sexual investigation with junior trainee … pontificating of one pundit left colleagues gobsmacked  … propensity for harassing junior male staff … resulted in staff leaving with payouts … 

Sue Ellen Braverman’s speeding ticket 

… Grease Bogg laughed off questions about whether he speeds … message from corridors of power is that speeding is something that everybody does … provisional  statistics for 2022 reveal 136,000 road casualties including 1,659 deaths … 

We need a new industrial revolution 

Can Labour provide one? … Manufacturing peaked across G7 countries in the mid 1960s …our political elites did deindustrialisation long and hard … manufacturing in Germany and Japan contribute 20% and 17% … in Britain 9.7% … we have the smallest manufacturing sector in the G7 and is shrinking the fastest … restricted the UK’s ability to haul itself out of recession … only a productivity miracle will provide an escape hatch … too small to drive an economic turnaround … there are solutions but none of them have the slightest chance of boosting UK to pole position within 5 years … the easiest way to achieve Labour’s growth target would be to boost inward immigration beyond the already all time high … the deindustrialisation mania of the 1980s and 1990s left us strategically insecure … learning must begin with frank admission of what we do not know … 

Keith Starmer’s attempt to win over Daily Express readers by nailing his colours to threadbare Brexit flag

… Starmer accused the EU of stealing our dinner money on the basis of a Brexit that he voted for … Express readers cynical about attempt to win them round…  at event in Ely not one person thought Brexit was going well … Brexit is the worst act of self harm in the world’s development … direction of opinion polls is all one way at the moment …  timing of Keith Starmer’s article … adamantly sticking to his ‘make Brexit work’ approach all the more baffling … reality has caught up with Johnson lies and Nigel Garbage fantasies … ‘Christ! This is worse than anybody expected’ … Keith Starmer promises the ‘highest sustained growth in the G7 … not going to happen until we fix the damage Brexit has done … 

Read Myths and Riffs of Brexit


… resignation honours always pretty dodgy … Thick Lizzie’s list has also been put on definite hold… prospect of Johnson’s unredacted WhatsApp messages being submitted as evidence to Covid enquiry is causing terror in the Cabinet Office … it is difficult to find ways to satirise this stuff … it would seem that whatever Johnson has just submitted is at least as damaging to his successors as it is to him… Schofield had an affair and lied about it … so did Johnson … Johnson lied about far more consequential things … Schofield is disgraced former TV presenter … why is Johnson never the disgraced former PM? … Schofield is a ruined, broken man … Johnson broke a country … plays the media like a fiddle, gets taxpayer to fund huge legal bills … buys a £4M house for cash …. Fights to put donors in the House of Lords…

Rupert Murdoch’s summer party 

Keen to demonstrate he is still breathing … dilemma for Keith Starmer … keen to ingratiate himself with Murdoch … also reluctant to alienate his natural base … 

Andrew Bridgen

… kicked out of Tory Party … sole Reclaim MP … predicted other Tories would be won over by Laurence Pox …remain in splendid isolation … Tories so unpopular people will vote for anybody who is not Tory … 

John Simpson 

BBC world affairs correspondent for 35 years … criticised BBC for giving too much air time to Brexiters … powers want the viewers to see him as little as possible…

Australia / NZ trade deals

… negligible contribution to British economy … not a good deal for the UK … gave far too much away for too little… 

National Conservatives

Knew their name would be abbreviated to NatCees and did it on purpose … human breach of the Ministerial Code Sue Ellen Braverman… 

Suella Braverman Priti Patel
Do you support killing children? Suella and Priti do.


We are not ready for the next pandemic … Arcturus is the  latest variant of Covid 19 …surged across India …detected in more than 30 countries … pathogen is still mutating …We cannot afford to drop our guard … 227,000 fatalities recorded in Britain to date … compare to 454,000 Brits killed in WW2 …  twice the toll of the virus but over six years not three … Lady Hallett’s inquiry … reported as Westminster soap opera … Richy Scumbag might reflect on Richard Nixon  … reluctance to hand over tapes led to impeachment … For PM who promised ‘integrity, professionalism and accountability to make himself vulnerable to charge of cover up is madness … preparations for a future pandemic are in a wretched state … when not if … we are not ready … infrastructure developed during the crisis is being dismantled or defunded … deliberate government policy … Westminster recrimination and desperate Tory infighting … 

Covid 19 inquiry 

Commissions in other countries finished their reports…. In complexity, political sensitivity…. only Chilcott Iraq inquiry  compares … most sensational hearings will come Autumn 2023 … focus on Johnson and his inner circle …’why did you skip five meetings …. did you really suggests you should be injected with Covid on TV … obtaining evidence has become a circus … Witness statements patchy and late … silence and obfuscation … Inquiry is still in the dark … Britain was led into a crisis by an inadequate and distracted PM …

Richy Scumbag 

Setting up a public enquiry then withholding evidence looks like an admission of guilt … Scumbag’s approval ratings at -21 point (20 points worse than Keith Starmer’s) … Scumbag accepted that his election defeat is inevitable … what is happening in Scumbag’s government is so ill thought-through that it is hard to believe that a clever Goldman Sachs man is in charge … furlough loans … undue generosity to fake businesses that have since disappeared … no hope of being repaid … Tory party riven with divides for decades … Scumbag as reluctant as his predecessors to confront them … striving to keep far right Sue Ellen Braverman lovers sweet, while attempting to please more moderate Tories … grandstanding … not impressive … other European countries benefitting hugely … another Brexit ‘freedom’ that is damaging … glaring evidence that government takes a blinkered view ….dogmatic approach leads government in indefensible positions … selfish … short-sighted … if Tories sneak an election victory … he will find himself confronting the same problems, only even more deep seated … sound bites will have vanished along with the hopes they promised … Scumbag does not look like a man in charge … increasingly looks like one leaving after the next election for comfortable life in Santa Monica … 

Economists wring their hands over seaside towns 

Metropolitan politicians fret (their inhabitants were likeliest to vote for Brexit) … ‘Good Lord! This is ghastly?’ … populist tides that resulted in Brexit swelling in eastern coastal towns … fertile soil for resentment based cause … 

Join us in Clacton next Thu 22 June

Pip Pip             Don Adamson Medway Delta (Retired)                       Brexorcist and Saboteur First Class 

The Daily Maul

Brexit Boom & BUSST

Our latest edition of the Daily Maul covers the massive litter tray of dead cats generated by Boris Johnson, Liz Truss, Rishi Sunakered and Nadine Dorries. This in the wake of Johnson’s long overdue fall from grace for killing 30 000 people unnecessarily and giving us an oven burned bungled Brexit. Please see our fact and fiction checker to tell the difference between facts and fictions in our edition of the Maul. Grab a copy of Private Eyelines for more of this stuff. Fight fascism with satire – the one thing they cannot take away from us.

The Daily Maul
Click on a dead cat to read Private Eyelines.


FACT : Liz Truss went on GB News (Gammon Balderdash News) last night, appearing to forget that she supported Remain in 2016. Her parents have disowned her. The kids must be next. Although she has not formed the BUSS (Boris-Truss) party, stranger things have happened. The Truss is out on manoeuvres to kill little Rishi Sunak along with Mad Nads and some other Tories.

Truss amnesia.

FACT : Boris Johnson was found guilty of lying repeatedly by a committee comprised mainly of his own party members. No amount of gaslighting or dead cattery can cover this up. Read the Select Committee report.

FACT : Boris Johnson started new job as Daily Mail columnist the day after the Select Committee (aka Kangaroo court) report found he lied repeatedly to Parliament. They have clearly picked the right man to lie for them. This itself is another breach of the Ministerial Code. His first report concerns the vitally unimportant fact that he takes drugs to stop him raiding the fridge at night for cheese and chorizo. He needs really to take drugs to stop his infatuation with fridges …

The Daily Maul
The real Daily Maul. Click to read the satire version.

FACT : Boom and Brexit Busted : Mark Carnage reports on Brexit Carnage and its effects on inflation in the Telegraph. YES, the Telegraph !! There was no Boris Brexit Boom. Carney was former Bank of England chief.

Click on the image to read the ‘Telegravda’.

FACT : Jacob Rees-Mogg and the other few remaining nutters on the deck of the SS Brexit are now calling for the removal of our sovereignty. Sovereignty was the very thing that they said we had to have back as the main reason for Brexit. This by the genius Cold War Steve:

Click to see Cold War Steve’s work.

FACT : Rishi Sunak has resorted to wearing brown boots that are nearly bigger than his torso in order to look like a ‘hard man’. Caught smiling on camera whilst the police raided a home yesterday in the traditional racist smirk pioneered by Priti Patel and gold-plated by Suella Braverman.

Behind a painted smile ….

Click to stop Johnson’s honour’s list


FICTION : The Truss and Johnson have not formed a new political party or had political intercourse, as far as we know.

FICTION : RIshi Sunak’s brown boots have not made him more or less racist. Just the standard amount or racism. Nor has little Rishi lost 3 inches in stature whilst playing Call of Duty. It was Liz Truss who was the shortest (lived) Prime Minister in history as this clip from James O’Brien on LBC shows.

FICTION : As far as we know, Boris Johnson has not ordered Carrie to deliver a new baby on Monday as a distraction when Parliament vote to accept the Select Committee report. Nor has Nadine Dorris moved back into nursing, or delivered a Cesarian section. However, if I were Carrie, I would not let Mad Nads near her.

From Mad Nad’s attic – the wonderful work of Cold War Steve.

Future directions for activism

Our efforts must now concentrate on four areas:

Changing Labour’s attitude to Brexit. See Hard Labour.

Continuing to move the dial in leave voters’ minds. See Strategies for Brexorcism.

Picking Remainers who are suffering from learned helplessness up off the floor. See Scottish Bylines.

Making the case for Rejoin more vigorously. See Strategies to Rejoin the EU.

Read Scottish Bylines

Read more : Go Nads

Read more : Brexit and geopolitics

Join us at BBC Question Time in Clacton Thu 22 June.
Live pictures from the Select Committee as taken by Nadine Dorries.

Daily Excess - Go Nads

Go Nads

Our latest edition of the Daily Excess covers the stories that the mainstream media will not print. Go Nads covers the fact that Brexit has failed. Sunak’s reputation is left in tatters and the main winner is Johnson’s hairdresser and his body double Michael Fabricate. For more headlines and hard facts to defeat Johnson’s lies like this, grab your copy of our book Private Eyelines – Have I got fake Brexit news for EU.

In the end, it was Boris’ hair that brought hime down …. click to read the book.

We must ensure that this means the end of the Tories in Uxbridge and Bedfordshire. Please support our Crowdfunder to do this. We plan a full campaign costing £1200 in terms of travel, accommodation and resources, over a period of several weeks

We also plan to launch an attack on the BBC Question Time Special in Clacton on June 22. Please support the initiative by giving us a donation towards costs via Paypal. We need a minimum of £500 to pay for garage costs, tyres, tax travel costs, flags, stickers etc. We will also need a team on the ground and maybe security from the Alt-Right.

Johnson has evaded the select committee by resigning before it reports on the findings of its review. This means that Johnson has wasted £250 000 of public money in legal fees. Please sign the petition to ask for YOUR MONEY back.

Meanwhile, Rishi Sunak’s stated values of integrity, professionalism and accountability are in tatters, having been forced to give Johnson his honours list in exchange for his silence on Sunak’s dubious tax affairs. Johnson gave these honours to the Downing Street hairdresser (no this is not a joke) and a list of cronies including those who broke lockdown rules at the Partygate events. Still more of these events are coming to light. 30 000 people died unnecessarily from Johnson’s decisions. He should really be in the Hague facing trial. Of course, it must be noted that Johnson has once again escaped all responsibility for Brexit carnage, aided and abetted by Keir Starmer who follows rather than leads at every step. Since the Tories and Brexit are dead, our efforts should be mostly focused on Labour. It would be a crying shame to get the Tories out only to find that we are left with a red Brexit, indistinguishable from a blue one. Even the left wing press are now calling for Starmer to turn in the wake of the fact that Brexit has failed. Just today we learn from Greg in Northern Ireland that UK-based suppliers or distributors of medicines should prepare for different packaging for medicines to be supplied to UK and EU markets from 1 January 2025. Brexit delivers more red tape and cost rather than the promised Brexit freedoms!

Rishi Sunak and Suella Braverman’s strategy – “when the boot comes in”.

Read more : Johnson’s Revenge

From the vault : Corona : Lessons learned

Please subscribe to Reboot Britain – it’s free

Join us on Wed 5th July 8 pm on ZOOM

Downing Street

Car crash special

Don Adamson reports on the Tory car crash special : the news that Rupert Murdoch dares not publish. It is indeed strange that a car trundles into a gate at 2 mph, causing no damage to the car or the gate and, all of a sudden, Rishi Sunak has to be evacuated. One is left wondering if this is a stunt dreamt up in Tufton Street to garner sympathy for Sunakered? Or, to insist on greater police powers to arrest children riding Playmobil cars in Britain, on suspicion of crimes against the state?

Talking cock

This week’s quotes: “Nigel Garbage sees himself as cock of the walk at Gammonite Balderdash News … sense of resentment that GB News does not remunerate him more handsomely … little or no logic on how people are paid … sniping about pay and grievances … Garbage paid £480 536 … Last year Labour raised £300,000 more from donors than Tories … Johnson’s earnings (sic) down from £766,000 to £216,000 from speeches in London, Pennsylvania and Lagos … not persuaded Johnson to give up the free accommodation that JCB heir, Lord Bamford, provides … not all joy in Johnson land. …


Tory wipe out in local elections … eccentric fan club Conservative Democratic Organisation champion his return to office …. Johnson fanzine Mail On Sunday decided to focus on Prince Harry bashing … support for Brexit drastically falling … 63% want UK to Rejoin … I cannot see the Tories coming back from this one … no disguising catastrophic results … a range of exhausted volcanoes … seven years of Brexit have been an unqualified disaster … terrible reckoning lies ahead of the Tories … the party is over. Brexit has reduced Tories to a populist campaigning movement … crude culture wars … nativist vilification…. Tories have to answer to the questions … nothing of substance to say … The sun is finally setting on a political empire born 44 years ago (Thatcherism) …

Starmer or Stammer?

It is high time the 21st century began in earnest . Is Starmer’s Labour Party up for the challenge? … Might the Mail and other right wing propaganda rags have been part of the reason for the Tories dire performance in recent elections … the difference between their version of politics and what is actually happening is now so vast it just makes people angrier … Tory tone deaf response to shellacking underlines how out of touch they are … ‘if they focussed less on stopping boatloads of refugees and more on stopping our teeth from falling out we might not be so desperate to kick out the Tories’ … I doubt Richy Scumbag will see that … What can Labour promise? … It is easier to be principled and uncompromising when you do not collide with reality … Any idiot can promise the world. There is nothing impressive about extravagant promises that can never become real … very few voters think the country is on the right track and even fewer want an opposition party to deliver more of the same only more competently …


I thought Brexit was, frankly, nuts, … the private equity sector think that Cruella de Ville is some kind of woke do-gooder ,,, financier Guy Hands has emerged as an intriguing and informed critic of the whole Brexit mess …a Brexit that was designed to tear up the accepted order, risk the country’s future and benefit the ultra rich … libertarian right wing – callous and uncaring assumed they would always survive decided to press ahead, setting their own needs ahead of the country … people dismissed Thick Lizzie as being incredibly stupid, whereas what she was saying was that the only way Brexit would work was basically to tear up the rule book … within a few weeks it was clear that could not happen and the country would go bankrupt … she was ideologically correct … that was the only way Brexit could work … ironic that Tory ministers try to blame the Civil Service or Remainers for the failure of Brexit … will not take responsibility for the fact that what they tried to do was delusional … the reality is that Brexit could never have worked … we have the worst of both worlds … the issue is how much damage will have been done to Europe as a whole … while it is bad for the UK it is bad for Europe as a whole …”

Car Crash
It is indeed strange that a car trundles into a gate at 2 mph, causing no damage to the car or the gate and, all of a sudden, Rishi Sunak has to be evacuated. One is left wondering if this is a stunt dreamt up in Tufton Street to garner sympathy for Sunakered? Or, to insist on greater police powers to arrest children riding Playmobil cars in Britain, on suspicion of crimes against the state? And what was Ann Widdecombe doing in the boot?

Winners and Losers

(COMMENT: I said this all along).  “The only people really benefitting are the Chinese … the damage from Brexit continues … we are losing our advantage. UK is being torn apart … death by a thousand cuts … They think the French are going to love us because we divorced them … UK is in decline … Britain has become rather nasty. Whether it is sending people to Rwanda or attacking people who disagree with the government…. we need politicians who admit they got it wrong … It is a mess … asking for such politicians nowadays is asking for pigs to fly … steady creep of Tory attacks on our freedom  … Britain feels less like a third country and more like a third world country …Brexit has done good job of making EU countries glad they are in it – they look at us and shudder … If voter ID cannot stop the anti Tory vote we should raise the voting age to 70 … we should add ‘expectation management’ to the ever growing list of things the Tories cannot do …  

Who are EU?

“World Health Organisation declared Covid 19 is no longer a ‘public health emergency … 7M deaths have been reported … WHO thinks the true toll is 20M …Fox Corporation swung to a quarterly loss because of costs associated with $787.5M settlement in a defamation case …Britain plays catch up in a global scramble for essential commodities …lacks the heft of USA, China or EU … it is a big hole to dig out of … Ramsgate Harbour once held a big fishing fleet … only sign of life is four cutters of the Border Force … in 2015 UKIP took control of Ramsgate council, first and last it would run…. shambolic … the issue of Brexit has faded … lives are dominated by the cost of living and the health service … UKIP lost all its councillors … the towns where the Brexit revolution started are showing signs it may be at an end … Mid Suffolk district council… first to be controlled by the Green Party …  decades of cuts to the British Army have called into question its ability in a conflict … at its smallest since the Napoleonic era …

From Russia with hate

Putain’s generals are useless, Putain himself is a ‘a complete asshole’ and the war is going to be lost … Russia’s willingness to go on fighting is approaching tipping point … what can break that arrogance, along with the propensity to rape, torture, murder and mutilate that Russian troops have become infamous for? … what, if anything might persuade Sue Ellen Braverman that her rhetoric and strategy might have gone too far … morally unacceptable … denounced by the UN Refugees Association, Council of Europe, UNICEF and former PM Theresa May … Braverman has been referred to the Bar Standards Board for breaching its code of conduct … what we in the trade call ‘ a lie’ … the majority of child exploitation groups are made up of white men under the age of 30 .., downright sinister shift in her rhetoric … even on its own terms the government is failing …

Bankrolled by Putin … now totally discredited … Nigel Farage

Truth bombs

Starmer promised that his government would be transformative … a good start would be to present himself as a leader with courage to speak the truth … rank hypocrisy … encouraging signs that this wave of popular illiberalism encouraged by irresponsible politicians is receding … Lincoln, Churchill and Kennedy demonstrated that nations can be inspired by confrontation with reality …. Richy Scumbag has worked out that an economy battered by Brexit cannot take much more of financial, legal, commercial and environmental chaos … Brexit being both symptom and cause of our decline … running the new line ‘if only we did Brexit the way we want it everything would be tickety boo … some of the many things about Brexit that were damaging the country … Brextremists never accepted responsibility for Brexit’s failure, and none of them ever had a credible plan …

Brexit Broadcasting Corporation

BBC has for years provided platforms to the Brexiters and they are never properly challenged nor scrutinised …  the right seem to defend their anti-woke diatribes as being rooted in free speech … in practice try to shut down any criticism of the populist, polarising, post truth approach … Brexit morass into which we are sinking more each day … more bad news about the impact of Brexit … “ Everything in the country seems broken … disappearing Tory voters and disaffected Brexiters … classic Tory tactic … arriving at fantasy uncosted figures … there is a real black hole … created by 13 years of bad government, austerity, slow productivity growth, and the disaster of Brexit … failing state with weak defence and a deteriorating health service … Brexit is costing the government some £40B to £50B per year in tax revenue …

Sharp cuts

RAF does not have enough pilots, the navy does not have enough ships and shrunken army cannot put an armoured division in the field … a host of other areas where massive cuts have sneaked through and the consequences are being felt … the police and the courts are groaning. The civil service’s ability to deal with crises has been affected by cuts … the atavistic Thatcherite belief that you can provide a good NHS, strong defence and everything else people and business need while keeping taxes low has been exposed as a lie … Brexit costing £100B a year in lost output … the chatter among the media classes is who will replace Sharp?  …

Pip Pip            Don Adamson Medway Delta (Retired)           Brexorcist and Saboteur First Class 

Coffey anyone?
Cats Against Brexit Mayhem

Farage’s fascist funeral

I have said on numerous occasions that populism will eat itself. And so it comes to pass, as Nigel Farage decides to cannibalise himself by stating that “Brexit has failed” this week. I wrote a song in 2018 that predicted Nigel’s demise at the confessional box of Farage’s fascist funeral. Just like Eleanor Rigby, nobody came. Check our film “We are Donkeys” out on our EU Tube Channel. It’s a dark dystopian piece of ambient jazz. not destined for the pop music charts, but it tells the tale of Nigel’s lonely demise in his bunker:

We are Donkeys.


Nigel was a great opportunist. Having failed to mobilise any meaningful movement around his euroscepticism over 20 years whilst taking a large salary from an employer he hated, he weaponised Tory austerity from 2010-2015. Angry people need something or someone else to blame. Nigel spotted that immigrants were an excellent target for ‘othering’. He set about leveraging the dissent within knuckle dragging racists and people with feeble minds who felt they did not have a voice in David Cameron’s Britain. Borrowing an old Nazi poster from the 1930’s, Nige kept his message simple and clear. “Breaking Point” was a huge success, contributing to a 12% swing in the referendum result which would have otherwise been 60 : 40 in favour of remaining in the European Union. When combined with the vacuous promises of Boris Johnson about “Taking Back Control” and giving £350 million to the NHS EVERY week, it represented a potent cocktail which people drank in straight glasses with a crown on the side. Cameron was caught with his pants down as he also assessed Nigel as an utter tosser. He could not believe it when Nigel use the killing of Jo Cox in the final push towards victory. Now that Nigel is dead, he seeks forgiveness for his sins, along with his wife Ann, who could not even afford a cheese sandwich at his funeral, choosing to appear on GB News instead. Nigel leaves his German children with a blue passport, a Toby jug and a 1970’s alarm clock to remind them of the final destination of Brexit. Nigel is remembered as being quintessentially a pound shop fascist and a piece of Eurotrash, not even worthy of a slot on Antoine de Caunes’ famous expose of all things kitsch, arcane, bizarre and just sad.

Cats Against Brexit Mayhem
Cats look for a cheese sandwich … Click image to support our work.

We’re only making plans for Nigel

Nigel’s admission will have systemic consequences. What does Rishi Sunak now do about his pound shop fascist Suella Braverman? What does Richard Tice do about the Reform party? How will the BBC find guests for Question Time? How will Jacob Rees-Mogg continue to espouse the benefits of Brexit in terms of cheaper training shoes etc.? How will Ann Widdecombe cope? Liz Truss? Penny Mordaunt? Kemi Badenoch? and much more … We finish with the A-side of the Nigel Farage single. “Nigel Farage’s Garage” is a song performed regularly on Downing Street and also in Swindon, The Reading Festival, Glastonbury, Leeds, Manchester, Harrogate, Durham, Barnard Castle, Brighton, Rochester, Deal, Faversham, Sittingbourne and …. Brussels. Please support our continuing work by buying The Brexit Party Album on Bandcamp. It’s the party album to end all tomorrow’s Brexit parties !!

From Dulwich Collage – As Nigel pointed out, he did not even go to the right school.

Brexit Party Album
The Brexit Party Album – download from Bandcamp by clicking on Ann, a Moggy or Nige.

What troubles me most ?

You know what really troubles me about our Government? It’s the fact that nobody gives a damn about being lied to on a daily basis. My own brother typifies the condition known as learned helplessness, when he points out that he was lied to in 1996 about his pension by the Government and so he now expects to be lied to on a daily basis. Although he voted to Remain, he has swallowed the lie that we must not interfere with the “will of the people”, nor does he understand how he might go about this if he did.

Click on the image to read Reboot Britain

Mike Cashman devised an interesting way to test the nation’s agreeableness to being lied to with his “acceptometer”. It asks you to decide whereabouts on a Likert scale you are prepared to accept being lied to on a daily basis by politicians. Test yourself on this simple example:

Where do you draw the line?

It occurred to me that this very dark piece of music I wrote a while back sums up the essential value conflict that Mike speaks of. In the piece Nigel Farage reflects on the poverty of his existence in a kind of confessional, set against a very dark backdrop of synths and saxes in a retro futurist jazz mashup. This is not pop music!

We are donkeys

We will be taking the Bollocks to Brexit Mini Cooper out again soon with your support. We are looking at Hampshire, Yorkshire, Kent, Essex and London but are open to offers from feisty campaigners. Please provide your support via Bollocks. We take no prisoners.


Grassroots shoots

Don Adamson writes in his inimitable style from Yorkshire.

This week’s quotes: “Thick Lizzie is putting herself in a dangerous position … least experienced cabinet team the UK has had for decades (Comment after 12 years in office) … she will need every bit of Civil Service buy in she can get …Any efforts to introduce yes men will just drain the Civil Service of competent staff …  … when Jacob Rees Mogg was supposedly in charge of public sector efficiency … incessantly wailing about civil servants not being at their desks while failing to notice that due to sell off of buildings there were not enough desks for civil servants to be at … Thick Lizzie’s moves are fundamentally unfair …  crisis in the National Health Service is well known …  calls for an independent enquiry (Comment: in Booming Brexit Britain an ‘independent enquiry is one that obeys Rupert Murdoch’s orders) … services unsafe as doctors struggle with huge workloads … no hope of building the promised 48 new hospitals … new Chancellor has admitted that any gas produced by fracking would not reduce costs for UK consumers … If he does not understand measures in his own price package what hope is there? …24 hours is maximum waiting time to file past body of the Queen … 40 hours waiting time endured by woman needing ambulance and hospital treatment … Thick Lizzie’s rusty Reaganomics … transplanting a 40 year old economic policy from USA to UK will not work … President brushed aside the contradictions … Thick Lizzie’s attempts to emulate the Gipper’s success is doomed …  Thick Lizzie’s cheerleaders have read only the first part of the history of Reagonomics …  early record was mixed … did not stop a recession … inflation rose … the result will be more conflict between monetary and fiscal policy … risk that inflation becomes entrenched … business leaders are warming to Labour … businesses despair of the Tory Party … after 12 years in office and four radically different PMs the Tories can hardly promise that Johnson’s tenure was especially shambolic … a suspicion that policy is being driven by ideological reflexes … Thick Lizzie’s approach worries firms … as for Jacob Rees-Mogg as business secretary, ‘I could think of a worse choice but you would have to give me an hour … NHS treats its workers so badly they are leaving … struggle to plan holidays … it is bonkers … the whole kit and caboodle of NHS employment is utterly Kafkaesque … working in an organisation that is indifferent to their needs … NHS can be a strikingly uncaring employer … The city is fighting to carve out a post Brexit role … 7,000 jobs, and £1.3Trillion of assets were lost from a sector that employs 1.1m … international firms opening a European hub prefer Amsterdam or Luxembourg … LSE’s importance as an equity hub has dwindled … in 2006 it raised 18% of global capital … in the first half of 2022 less than 1% … A wholesale repeat of the City’s post war reinvention remains out of reach …  boosting the economy while ignoring environmental harm would be bonkers … keeping the heat on has replaced flying as an aspiration … Politicians of all stripes console themselves with the thought that Brits voted to leave the EU because they were misled by other, less upstanding politicians. ‘Nobody voted to be poorer’ runs the refrain. A scarier possibility is that people knew perfectly well what they voted for. Brexit will create a smaller economy but voters did not care … Thick Lizzie resembles a neo-liberal Kamikaze pilot, prepared to blow herself up for her cause …. The mad scientists … an experiment to test the riskiest of trickle down fantasies … It seems we have been misled … all we have needed all along was for the government to give vast amounts of money to the rich and wait for it to somehow boost the economy …Established economic theories and fact based research have disappeared a naysayer in a photograph of Stalin … all previous Tory governments have been left wing dupes … how doing nothing is supposed to increase growth is a mystery … this government will just find the money elsewhere …  many things about this budget do not make sense … will cost the treasury a fortune … no additional growth, just a lower tax take … Cutting red tape is a right wing panacea, the kind prompted by snake oil sellers … the details are shocking … Justice system, social care, ambulance services and NHS are already on their knees … none of these measures likely to increase growth at all … a right wing wet dream … without even a semblance of an effort to make the numbers add up, no  wonder the Office for Budget Responsibilities has been gagged … terrible news for those with mortgages (Comment: Daily Mail readers will love that) … right wing commentators in the press are praising it to the skies, but ignore these and read their financial pages instead … a right wing fantasy, an ideologically driven experiment to stuff the mouths of the rich with gold … it is betting with borrowed money that nobody knows how to repay … schoolboy errors … put the UK economy at risk … Kwarteng has always been a high risk appointment … too casual … too enamoured of his own intellect … a cabinet determined by loyalty to Truss rather than competence … in the space of four days three decades of sound economic management have gone up in smoke … pound suffered a rout … cartoon Thatcherism … Millwall strategy (no one likes us, we don’t care) is hardly a serious approach … Kwarteng, like the Bourbons has learned nothing and forgotten nothing …  betrayed weakness not strength …,It is a fantasy to pretend that Britain can ignore the trend … a grab bag of ideas, poorly presented …it makes you wonder if Thick Lizzie is an undercover agent for the Bring Back Boris campaign … smug, cruel, arrogant, know it all ideologies …f*** the lot of you … failings of a wasted decade … sounds like insider trading … if it had happened under a Labour government the papers would have played merry hell … the money markets have made it clear they have no faith in Trussonomics … detestable characters in the Johnson resignation honours list … there are claims that Nadine Dorries knowingly misled Parliament …

Pip Pip             Medway Delta (Retired)           Saboteur and Brexorcist First Class 

Editor’s footnote: since Don wrote this, another Tory MP has been fired …

Schools Out

This is a kind of “end of term” report for Boris Johnson and the Conservative party. The Prime Minister has gone off for another summer rest. Well deserved? Adrian Ekins-Dauke’s invites you to judge for yourself:


Ex-Russian intelligence staff say 85% of their work is not spying, but “political funding and misinformation”. Since 2012, the Tory party has received almost £3m in donations from members of Putin’s cabinets and 14 current ministers have had donations from individuals or companies connected to the Russian leadership

The government delayed the release of the Intelligence Committee’s report on Russian interference in Brexit for 9 months. The reasons given for the delay were described as “simply not true” by the Committee. Our Home Secretary, Priti Patel said the Russia Report could be ignored because it was now 9 months old and “out of date” (One wonders whether she takes a similar view of unresolved murder, rape and other serious cases which become “out of date” after 9 months).


Matt Hancock boasted he had met the targets on his “six tests” on COVID-19. In fact 4 of the 6 targets were missed, one target couldn’t be met because it had never been defined, and one “relied on a definition [that] does not reflect practice”.

The cross-party Public Accounts Committee found there was an “astonishing failure to plan for the economic impact” of COVID-19. It also said the policy of discharging patients into care homes was a “reckless and appalling policy error”. It called the government “slow, inconsistent [and] negligent”. The Committee chair said “A competent government does not run a country on the hoof”.


Now for PPE contracts …

£252m to Ayanda Capital, registered in Mauritius for tax purposes. PPE not delivered.
£186m to Uniserve. PPE not delivered.
£116m to P14 Medical Supplies, with assets of just £145. PPE not delivered.

£108m to PestFix, with just 16 employees. PPE not delivered.

£107m to Clandeboye Agencies, a sweet wholesaler. Yes, a sweet wholesaler. PPE not delivered.
£40m to Medicine Box Ltd, with assets of just £6000. PPE not delivered.
£48m to Initia Ventures Ltd, which registered itself as “dormant” in March. PPE not delivered.

£28m to Monarch Acoustics, which makes shop furniture. PPE not delivered.

£25m to Luxe Lifestyle, which has no employees, no assets, and no turnover. PPE not delivered.
£18m to Aventis Solutions, which has total assets of £332. Not a typo, £332! PPE not delivered.

£10m to Medco Solutions, incorporated just 3 days after lockdown, with share capital of (not a typo) £2. PPE not delivered.

In all, approx £1 bn to inexplicable suppliers for PPE that hasn’t been delivered. This of course costs lives.

A Nuffield Health study found after 10 years of “chronic underinvestment”, UK is at the bottom of the league table for health resources, diagnostics and surgery by the NHS will take 4 years to return to pre-COVID levels.

The government’s “world beating” test-and-trace programme was described as “scandalous” by the British Medical Journal, and found to miss its 80% target in every COVID hotspot announced last week

Finally, Boris Johnson refused a public enquiry into government handling of COVID-19.


A report from London School of Economics has shown a WTO Brexit will shrink 16 out of the UK’s 24 industry sectors by up to 15% each. Permanently. A Tory MP tweeted:

“? WTO here we come!”

Another pro-Brexit Tory MP with a grasp of what’s to come tweeted:

“my strong advice is: “take the chance to live abroad”.


The cross-party Media & Culture Committee has reported that “government has consistently failed to recognise scale of challenge facing culture, sport and tourism and had been ‘too slow’ to respond to their needs during COVID-19.

Boris Johnson launched a “Fix Your Bike” voucher website. It broke within an hour. The editor applied and found that the website did not work. I called the people and was promised vouchers. On following up I was told the scheme was closed.

Johnson also said we should all lose weight. This is certainly true in his case at 17 Stone. However, Johnson is still issuing vouchers to help us buy burgers.

Boris Johnson would not get a job as a WeightWatchers coach

It was revealed the government spent £400m buying a bankrupt satellite company, OneWeb, to replace the Euro GPS system we have lost due to Brexit. Months before, a study by MIT found that OneWeb’s tech is 6 times less efficient than the EU solution: the worst of the technologies studied.

In June, the government guaranteed that there would be no cuts in overseas aid when the Foreign Office and International Development Dept merged. It announced cuts of £2.9 bn in aid on the day Parliament broke up for the summer, thus avoiding questions on broken their promises.

The government has permitted your health records to be given to Palantir, a large US data-mining company and to Faculty, owned by an associate of Dominic Cummings and said to have worked with Cambridge Analytica on Brexit.

Our overall assessment of the Government is 2/10. What’s yours?

Write to your MP and make these points. Ask them not to add the man made disaster of Brexit to Corona Crisis.

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