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Category: Boris Johnson

The Daily Maul

Brexit Boom & BUSST

Our latest edition of the Daily Maul covers the massive litter tray of dead cats generated by Boris Johnson, Liz Truss, Rishi Sunakered and Nadine Dorries. This in the wake of Johnson’s long overdue fall from grace for killing 30 000 people unnecessarily and giving us an oven burned bungled Brexit. Please see our fact and fiction checker to tell the difference between facts and fictions in our edition of the Maul. Grab a copy of Private Eyelines for more of this stuff. Fight fascism with satire – the one thing they cannot take away from us.

The Daily Maul
Click on a dead cat to read Private Eyelines.

HARD FACTS

FACT : Liz Truss went on GB News (Gammon Balderdash News) last night, appearing to forget that she supported Remain in 2016. Her parents have disowned her. The kids must be next. Although she has not formed the BUSS (Boris-Truss) party, stranger things have happened. The Truss is out on manoeuvres to kill little Rishi Sunak along with Mad Nads and some other Tories.

Truss amnesia.

FACT : Boris Johnson was found guilty of lying repeatedly by a committee comprised mainly of his own party members. No amount of gaslighting or dead cattery can cover this up. Read the Select Committee report.

FACT : Boris Johnson started new job as Daily Mail columnist the day after the Select Committee (aka Kangaroo court) report found he lied repeatedly to Parliament. They have clearly picked the right man to lie for them. This itself is another breach of the Ministerial Code. His first report concerns the vitally unimportant fact that he takes drugs to stop him raiding the fridge at night for cheese and chorizo. He needs really to take drugs to stop his infatuation with fridges …

The Daily Maul
The real Daily Maul. Click to read the satire version.

FACT : Boom and Brexit Busted : Mark Carnage reports on Brexit Carnage and its effects on inflation in the Telegraph. YES, the Telegraph !! There was no Boris Brexit Boom. Carney was former Bank of England chief.

Click on the image to read the ‘Telegravda’.



FACT : Jacob Rees-Mogg and the other few remaining nutters on the deck of the SS Brexit are now calling for the removal of our sovereignty. Sovereignty was the very thing that they said we had to have back as the main reason for Brexit. This by the genius Cold War Steve:

Click to see Cold War Steve’s work.

FACT : Rishi Sunak has resorted to wearing brown boots that are nearly bigger than his torso in order to look like a ‘hard man’. Caught smiling on camera whilst the police raided a home yesterday in the traditional racist smirk pioneered by Priti Patel and gold-plated by Suella Braverman.

Sunakered
Behind a painted smile ….

Click to stop Johnson’s honour’s list

PULP FICTION

FICTION : The Truss and Johnson have not formed a new political party or had political intercourse, as far as we know.

FICTION : RIshi Sunak’s brown boots have not made him more or less racist. Just the standard amount or racism. Nor has little Rishi lost 3 inches in stature whilst playing Call of Duty. It was Liz Truss who was the shortest (lived) Prime Minister in history as this clip from James O’Brien on LBC shows.

FICTION : As far as we know, Boris Johnson has not ordered Carrie to deliver a new baby on Monday as a distraction when Parliament vote to accept the Select Committee report. Nor has Nadine Dorris moved back into nursing, or delivered a Cesarian section. However, if I were Carrie, I would not let Mad Nads near her.

From Mad Nad’s attic – the wonderful work of Cold War Steve.

Future directions for activism

Our efforts must now concentrate on four areas:

Changing Labour’s attitude to Brexit. See Hard Labour.

Continuing to move the dial in leave voters’ minds. See Strategies for Brexorcism.

Picking Remainers who are suffering from learned helplessness up off the floor. See Scottish Bylines.

Making the case for Rejoin more vigorously. See Strategies to Rejoin the EU.

Read Scottish Bylines

Read more : Go Nads

Read more : Brexit and geopolitics

Join us at BBC Question Time in Clacton Thu 22 June.
Live pictures from the Select Committee as taken by Nadine Dorries.

Daily Excess - Go Nads

Go Nads

Our latest edition of the Daily Excess covers the stories that the mainstream media will not print. Go Nads covers the fact that Brexit has failed. Sunak’s reputation is left in tatters and the main winner is Johnson’s hairdresser and his body double Michael Fabricate. For more headlines and hard facts to defeat Johnson’s lies like this, grab your copy of our book Private Eyelines – Have I got fake Brexit news for EU.

In the end, it was Boris’ hair that brought hime down …. click to read the book.

We must ensure that this means the end of the Tories in Uxbridge and Bedfordshire. Please support our Crowdfunder to do this. We plan a full campaign costing £1200 in terms of travel, accommodation and resources, over a period of several weeks

We also plan to launch an attack on the BBC Question Time Special in Clacton on June 22. Please support the initiative by giving us a donation towards costs via Paypal. We need a minimum of £500 to pay for garage costs, tyres, tax travel costs, flags, stickers etc. We will also need a team on the ground and maybe security from the Alt-Right.

Johnson has evaded the select committee by resigning before it reports on the findings of its review. This means that Johnson has wasted £250 000 of public money in legal fees. Please sign the petition to ask for YOUR MONEY back.

Meanwhile, Rishi Sunak’s stated values of integrity, professionalism and accountability are in tatters, having been forced to give Johnson his honours list in exchange for his silence on Sunak’s dubious tax affairs. Johnson gave these honours to the Downing Street hairdresser (no this is not a joke) and a list of cronies including those who broke lockdown rules at the Partygate events. Still more of these events are coming to light. 30 000 people died unnecessarily from Johnson’s decisions. He should really be in the Hague facing trial. Of course, it must be noted that Johnson has once again escaped all responsibility for Brexit carnage, aided and abetted by Keir Starmer who follows rather than leads at every step. Since the Tories and Brexit are dead, our efforts should be mostly focused on Labour. It would be a crying shame to get the Tories out only to find that we are left with a red Brexit, indistinguishable from a blue one. Even the left wing press are now calling for Starmer to turn in the wake of the fact that Brexit has failed. Just today we learn from Greg in Northern Ireland that UK-based suppliers or distributors of medicines should prepare for different packaging for medicines to be supplied to UK and EU markets from 1 January 2025. Brexit delivers more red tape and cost rather than the promised Brexit freedoms!

Rishi Sunak and Suella Braverman’s strategy – “when the boot comes in”.

Read more : Johnson’s Revenge

From the vault : Corona : Lessons learned

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Big Foot

Putin the boot in

By Don Adamson, Brexorcist in Chief, the Brexit Bunker, Barnsley.

This week’s homework: Discuss the following statement – ‘Woke’ is a term that Neo Nazi Nonces use to describe their moral and intellectual superiors. 

This week’s quotes:

Tory Trumpectory

Even Matt Hancock warned that the Tory Party would be finished if a Trumpian takeover was allowed to happen … If Tory party allows itself to taken over by a right wing version of Momentum … its future looks bleak …

Nigel Farage’s admission that ‘Brexit has failed shows once again that for Nigel Garbage it is always somebody else’s fault … has not delivered any benefits … totally mismanaged … The new Real Communism … just because it has all gone wrong does not mean it is a bad idea … what has gone wrong has done so in exactly the ways that every expert warned … Brexiters got their version of Brexit … Thick Lizzie attempted to deliver the Brexit that Nigel Garbage had been talking up for years … it exploded on contact with reality … instead of accepting that Brexit was always an idiotic fantasy the Nigel Garbages of the world scold others for failing to deliver … as effective as scolding the shopkeeper for selling a losing lottery ticket when you wanted a winner … 

Two cheeks of the same arsehole.
Two cheeks of the same arsehole.

Nat-C party

NatCees “Watching last week’s NATcees conference was a surreal as it was disturbing … Speakers sounded very whiny …. Tories have been in office for 13 years … got the hard Brexit that they wanted … an extraordinary lack of responsibility…. … and increasing sense from people running the show that someone else is in charge … publicly sulking that the job is hard … have become so detached from reality … they look at what they have done without realising that they did it … Evangelical Christians seem to have forgotten that they worship a homeless Rabbi Jew, a refugee who spoke Aramaic, was frequently homeless, lived in poverty, preached forgiveness, tolerance and loving one’s neighbour… 

National Illness Service

National Health Service “Hospital waiting lists spiral beyond 7M … patients wait months or even years for treatment … 300,000 adults wait for social care assessment … 2.5M Brits are out of work because they are sick … NHS staff leaving in droves …  the country’s recent record of revolutionary change does not inspire confidence” … Britain spends less on health care than France or Germany … in the next 25 years the number of Brits aged 85+ will double … makes no sense … the equivalent of buying more fire extinguishers while dismantling the smoke alarms …  Britain would rather forget about Liz Truss. She just won’t lettuce … NHS is in grave difficulties … few will forget how many patients died waiting for ambulances and lying in hospital corridors … one in eleven posts in the NHS is vacant … fewer hospital beds per person than almost any rich country, fewer CT scanners ..

Health outcomes lag behind peers … worst five year survival rates for killer diseases…. life expectancy lags behind … Britain invested the least capital per person in health care in 2015 … nurses, junior doctors, others … suffered a decade of real terms pay cuts … England now spends the lowest share of health budget on dentistry of any country in Europe … Britain is the third fattest country in Europe … if everybody was healthy weight … could save NHS £1.4B a year … reform technology … there is an awful lot of work to do … bungled implementation … NHS has a long list of problems to tackle …staff retention is poor. Politicians still liable to meddle, apart from Johnson who just hides in fridges when there is work to be done …

Brexit Too Little, Too Late
A stitch up in time saves nine …

Turncoats

This week’s quote: “Tom Tugendhat is new Security Minister at the Home Office … Remainer turned Leaver … holds dual British and French citizenship … has stake in two companies awarded £17.8M worth of government contracts … Accurx awarded 3576,458 contract to provide electronic communications for GP practices in … also participates £120M contract … for technology services …  ambivalent on Brexit … complained how bad things were getting … 

Industry “Britain’s semi-conductor industry show the bind the country is in … Britain’s announcement looks anaemic … Britain has a smattering of domestic chip firms, it lacks a big manufacturer … Can the government’s latest strategy move the needle? … Even its defenders concede it is unlikely to change things… Britain’s claim to be ‘world leader’ in tech is true only in the sense that it is blazing a trail for non-democracies to pass repressive laws…

Science, Tech and Environmental impacts of Brexit. It ain’t pretty.

Sick man of Europe

Economy … little –if any – good news in the figures … core inflation at its highest rate since 1992. … Rising mortgage costs and stubbornly high inflation…    will be wealthier than the UK by 2030 … Eastern Europe has been an economic underperformer for centuries … there is plenty of room for a surge … Poland did everything it could to get into the EU at earliest opportunity … fought to be as European as possible … UK has not even recovered to its pre Covid size … UK bouncing along the bottom for 15 years. UK productivity last grew this slowly in the 18th century…. on top of that we had Brexit … Britain needs to reform and go for growth … even if it had all those things it would still be outside the EU which is a deal breaker … we all benefit from a  wealthier Europe … An increasingly erratic Tory government in Westminster …

Ducking Stool
New Brexit treatments available from Jacob Rees-Mogg on the NHS.

Shameful behaviour

Government’s immigration policy is incoherent … Brits want more nurses, doctors, fruit pickers, carers, academics, computer whizzes and students … Tories have come up with an impeccably botched response … Tories pledged to cut immigration … has instead overseen an immigration increase to a record level  … Immigration has increased sharply since the Brexit vote … The government could crack down on fruit pickers but farmers would scream. Few voters would thank a government that turns away nurses. Cutting immigrations comes at a cost that voters show no willingness to pay 

Daily Mail Richard Littlejohn … salary £1M a year … shoutiest Daily Mail shouty man … contends that civil service and renegade Tories are working to destroy Tory government … could not name a single one of these dastardly plotters … because they do not exist … Desperate.

Social impacts of Brexit – well worth 10 minutes of your time.

Johnsonism

Johnson deranged Tories risk destroying themselves over Johnson … much energy expended on artificial intelligence … no less spectacular growth of the other 21st century phenomenon: stupidity  … Why do so many Tories want to bring back Johnson? … trousering millions for speaking engagements and memoirs … politics as gruesome showbiz … jaded cabaret act … betrayal narrative is hardening in Tory Party … Johnson is  Tory Party future … new lockdown breaches … In a rational world this would be bad news for Johnson … deranged dystopia of Tory town … noisily presented by militant Borisians as evidence of foul play … manifest absurdity of such a disgraced figure making a comeback is eclipsed by the intoxicating myth of a great man felled by lesser mortals … eight cabinet ministers called for his return to Downing St … growing marked in increasingly desperate Tory Party for a simple solution to a huge electoral problem …

Honey I shredded the evidence
Honey I shredded the evidence.

Sunakered

Richy Scumbag project has disastrously failed … floundering abjectly in the real world Tories are seeking solace in magical thinking … conveniently forget that dragged the government into an ethical sewer … many travesties and scandals … He ought to be a political pariah … example of political culture in bad shape … nostalgia at its most corrosive. It ought to be a cause for anxiety far beyond the Tory Party… Fees for Eton … £15,432 each half which means thrice yearly … does not stretch to fractions…  

Big Foot
BIG FOOT Sunak thinks that it’s agreeable to spend £50 000 on helicopters EVERY DAY in the middle of a cost of living crisis.

Brexiter’s Bible

Even Express readers see the light … universal consensus that Brexit was a terrible idea … Brexiter’s Bible, the Daily Express … declared that two thirds of its readers consider Brexit to be a failure … even that unflushable turd, Nigel Garbage, agrees … it is only a failure if you were naive enough to believe that Brexit was MEANT  to make things better … prior to becoming the Brexiter’s Bible the Express sustained itself as the in-house magazine for  posthumous stalkers of Princess Diana … 

Brexit Bible
The Brexit Bible.

Fog on the Tyne

Teesside Scandal Richy Scumbag claims ‘it is the Tories who are delivering for Tyneside’ … even Gove’s panel should be able to work out that the no risk, free money bonanza … is delivering a lot more for a few select Teessiders than for the rest … 

Travel delays Electronic borders crashed … latest fiasco … lamentable attempts bring entry points into the 21st century…

Pip Pip             Don Adamson Medway Delta (Retired)           Brexorcist and Saboteur First Class 

Save the Bollocks to Brexit Mini

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Read more : BREX and the City

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Save the Bollocks to Brexit Mini Cooper

Save the Bollocks to Brexit Mini

Do you want to save the ‘Bollocks to Brexit’ Mini Cooper from the scrap yard? We need funds to take ‘Johnson’ the mini on the road around UK and Europe to remind people that Brexit has failed. The car has generated significant mainstream media publicity for the Rejoin / anti-Brexit cause. Accordingly, now that less than 1/5th of British people think that Brexit was worth it, we plan to take the car on tour to local groups for the purpose of mass Brexorcisms. Our visits can be accompanied by a musical protest and motivational speeches.

Save the Mini

This story went across all mainstream media in UK, Ireland and Europe. It went as far as the New York Times and Australia !! It’s a superior return on your investment.

We have taken the car from Dominic Cummings house to Barnard Castle to check our eyesight. Also to Brussels, and all round Britain. The car, codenamed ‘Johnson’ was stopped by Essex Traffic Policeman PC Smith, in a rage on the M25 motorway.  Smith asked us to remove the signage on the car on the hard shoulder of the M25, putting the police officer and the passengers at risk of death.  Subsequently, Smith has not been located by Essex Police some three years after we provided his full details to the force … All that is needed is political will to change the ongoing ‘Britastrophe‘.  

From Wikipedia.

Brexit has failed. Rejoin EU

We will put boots on the ground to stomp on the big footed fuckers of Brexit bollocks.
COVID memorial wall

Johnson’s revenge

In the wake of Rishi Sunak’s attempts to cover up the COVID inquiry, I spoke with Marina Purkiss about ‘Johnson’s revenge’ on Rishi Sunak. Marina asked whether Boris Johnson is playing a blinder with his recent offer to release notebooks and WhatsApp messages to the COVID inquiry? And just how much of a threat do people think Johnson is to Sunak? Listen to my dialogue with Marina here:

Marina Purkiss on LBC - Johnson's revenge
Click on the image to listen to the interview with Marina on LBC

If I were charged with murdering 30 000 people and asked to go to court, would it be agreeable if I were to dictate what evidence was submitted to that court?

I am divided. A tiny bit of me wants to expose Johnson. I said jokingly that at least we would know how many kids he had! Yet the issues we face as a country are far more important than taking revenge on any one person or any reproductive trivia. At least 30 000 vulnerable people died unnecessarily at the hands of Johnson, Hancock et al. The truth must be heard and justice done. This is not a Philip Schofield styled media fest, it is a serious matter. So here’s how I see Johnson’s intervention and timing:

Johnson’s revenge imperative

Johnson is a single celled organism – with one simple metric for his decisions – what is good for Boris Johnson. This will be guiding his decision to release the information to the inquiry. I sense that he thinks that he will gain first mover advantage over Sunak by acting now. Remember that strategy according to Johnson is what appears on the front pages of the Daily Mail etc. the day after he opens his mouth.

Johnson is also a reliable liar. The devil is always in the detail and, at present, Johnson has only offered to release WhatsApp messages from his current phone, from mid 2021. Many of the important decisions on herd immunity, putting infected patients into care homes etc. were made in 2020. Another piece of fudge has since been introduced … that his old phone must not be restarted, as it may release information to hackers … there are plenty of solutions to this problem such as Faraday cages. Experts judge the risks to be extremely low anyway. As always with Johnson, I smell a rat.

Boris Johnson's choices
Let’s remember it’s about political choices, not parties or personalities.

Johnson the disruptor

I seriously doubt Johnson’s ability to construct a coherent plan to replace Sunak, mainly because detailed planning is not Johnson’s forte and, in any case, the situation is complex and fluid. However, Johnson is a disruptor and an opportunist. Accordingly, I favour the idea that he has done this simply to create chaos and then hope to profit from what emerges. Johnson’s sense of hubris and supremacy may well make him think that he can replace Sunak and comeback for a glorious second term. However, I find myself in agreement with Ian Dale who also appeared on the programme. Johnson has had a toxic effect on his party and his star is fading fast compared with 2019 when he lied to ‘get Brexit done’ by putting it in a microwave oven, gas mark 4.

The Tory party is also ruthless once someone is of no further use to them. As such, I suspect that analysts and advisors have gamed the various Johnson renaissance scenarios on electoral success. The COVID issue also changed everything. 30 000 unnecessary deaths arising from Johnson’s deliberate act of putting infected COVID patients into care homes, based on Dominic Cummings’ obsession with herd immunity. Alternative choices were available.

Dying for Boris - Johnson's revenge
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Wishful thinking

I confess that I want Johnson back in power. In case you think that I’m losing my mind, let me explain. Johnson has never taken responsibility for anything in his life. His return as PM would mean he would have to take responsibility for the impact of Brexit and COVID. Rishi Sunak dodges responsibility for both, as they were not his doing. But I very much doubt I’ll get my wish via Johnson’s revenge. We’ll have to settle the matter through the courts and via elections if the British people will not rise up to say that ‘Enough is Enough’.

Sign the petition – release all the WhatsApp messages

Johnson’s revenge : Sunakered

Johnson’s revenge will strike a hammer blow to Sunak. Whether it is a knock out blow remains to be seen. It is entirely fair for Baroness Hallett to see the evidence and for her and her team to decide what is relevant and what irrelevant. After all, that is their job as professionals. They will want to decide how well decisions were made and how COVID was prioritised against other goals. We already know that medical evidence was not at the top of the charts from recent releases. Johnson preferred to meet members of the right wing press to discuss newspaper headlines and sales over scientists, statisticians and sages. This is the wrong prioritisation.

Boris Johnson's priorities - Media, media, media
Johnson’s COVID strategy : Science unimportant, right wing media relations priceless.

Imagine being charged of a crime but insisting that the judge and jury must NOT see the evidence !!

Opening the chamber of secrets

The possible reasons why Rishi Sunak does not want the COVID inquiry fit into two categories : internal combustion and external corruption.

Internal combustion : The WhatsApp trails may reveal a dysfunctional web of relationships with media, COVID party plans, lying to the Queen and avoidable deaths from Rishi Sunak’s “Eat out to help out” scheme. Worst of all, it may expose the blood letting that comes from the chronic internecine warfare inside the Tory party. Some of this may be considered irrelevant information. However, if the balance of internal combustion : focusing on the pandemic is such that decisions were missed, avoided or delayed, such information would rightly be considered as relevant. The strain on Tory party cohesion may be impossible to endure. This may explain Sunak’s attempt to try to bury the COVID inquiry.

External corruption. We may learn how pub landlords were considered to be competent players in the PPE game, when existing medical device companies were ignored. We may also learn more about the £37 billion spaffed on PPE which did not work. Then Russian involvement in Brexit. How COVID was used to mask Brexit carnage. How the Tories briefed the media to feed the public various messages … and so on.

Sunak has now threatened Johnson with the removal of taxpayer funding for his court case. This would seem to indicate that Sunak has something to hide. Of course, the taxpayer should not be funding his court costs, but that’s an entirely separate matter which we are addressing via a petition. Meanwhile Johnson continues to lie in order to save himself.

The COVID inquiry must go ahead unhindered

Lest we forget : An example of Johnson’s word salad on the disastrous Australian Brexit trade deal.

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From the vault : Tory Brexit Scum

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Brex and the city

BREX and the city

In the wake of the collapse of Ann Summers’ exports to Ireland due to Brex-rated blue tape and costs, this update charts various issues relating to BREX and the city.

Con-domination

Ann Summers pulled out from direct sales to Ireland last year. They stated that ‘higher operating costs’ associated with Brexit made it ‘uneconomical’, according to their anal report. Despite promises of frictionless trade by Michael Gove, no amount of business lubrication could save Ann Summer’s operations. Brexit has literally fucked people over.

ANALYSIS : The Ann Summers story is one of a kind. Rishi Sunak has had to offer inducements aka bribes to keep Jaguar Land Rover in Britain and prop up Tory MPs in the Midlands and West Country. Read the report from the Tony Blair institute for more insights into Brexit carnage. One of the predicted outcomes from Brexit is a decline in trade East – West from GB to the island of Ireland and an increase in trade North – South from NI to the Republic of Ireland. Rishi Sunak was right when he suggested that NI had the best of both worlds. The rest of Britain should follow this example and Join EU anew.

ACTION : Please join us Wed 7th June on ZOOM to consider next steps to take action on ending Brexit and joining EU anew.

Britain – once again the sick man of the world.
Brex and the city
New Ann Summers reps recruited after collapse of sex chain in Ireland. Click image to read more.

Indecent proposals

Rishi Sunak has decided that he does not want trusted colleagues to see his WhatsApp messages for the COVID inquiry. Instead he has decided to take the Civil Service to court to prevent them being able to do their job properly. Sunak’s attack on the judiciary and civil service is something that would be more at home in North Korea, Russia, Nigeria, Pakistan etc., an indecent proposal. So much for Sunak’s promises of integrity, professionalism and accountability. Somewhat strangely, Johnson says he has lost his phone from 2020 – 2021 and has not complied with the request for transparency. At the back of this story are all the people whose loved ones died and were unable to say their farewells. These include the Queen. All while Boris Johnson partied hard. It is beyond words to describe the contempt with which this Government view the general public and their loved ones.

COVID memorial wall
Johnson lied, people died.

ANALYSIS : It seems extremely odd that Rishi Sunak would take civil servants to court for trying to do their job properly. Especially so when it was his Government who actually commissioned the inquiry that they are now trying to stop. The Government has admitted that they are not expecting to win this challenge, yet they are willing to waste taxpayers’ money to do so. There must be such damning material in the diaries and WhatsApp messages that Rishi Sunak feels he has no choice but to criminalise the civil servants he asked to do the work. It also allows for more dither and delay to bury the evidence along with the bodies. Another possible explanation is that this is a stand-off between Boris Johnson and Rishi Sunak, with Johnson using the inquiry to discredit Sunak for a heroic comeback. Whilst I personally believe that Johnson is terminally injured by his actions as PM, Johnson’s level of hubris may mean that he thinks otherwise. We shall see. In any case, this is a new low for Sunak.

ACTION : We are presently preparing a petition about the need to repay taxpayer’s money on this legal case. More about that soon.

The Queen sat alone whilst Johnson partied hard, snorted coke and broke swings.

Brexodus and the city

One of the lesser reported impacts of Brexit is the slow brain drain of finance professionals from the City of London to Brussels and Dublin. Here are some facts about Brexodus and the city from UK Government:

UK GDP is set to shrink by 1 per cent this year, compared to 0.1 per cent for the eurozone.

Brexit has reduced our GDP by 5.5 per cent, investment by 11 per cent and reduced goods and services trade by 7 per cent.

The London School of Economics found that Britons are paying an extra 6 billion pounds to eat because of Brexit with food inflation running at more than 13 per cent.

The estimated cost to the Treasury in lost tax revenues due to Brexit is £40 billion, more than the supposed £39 billion savings promised by Brexit.

The number of businesses in London experiencing at least one skills shortage has now risen to almost 7 in 10.

The number of jobs in London held by EU-born workers has fallen by over 80,000.

“While Whitehall has taken a vow of silence on the damage Brexit is causing, businesses across the country are drowning under the weight of increased bureaucracy, staffing shortages and supply chain challenges. London is being hit hard by the loss of trade and talent to our global competitors.” Sadiq Khan, Mayor of London.

ANALYSIS : You may be asking why this matters? Well, in 2021, the financial services sector contributed £173.6 billion to the UK economy, 8.3% of total economic output. The slow destruction of the sector will impact all that serve the sector, from taxi drivers to restaurant owners.

ACTION : There are no actions that we can take in the short term to stop this. Even undoing Brexit is unlikely to stop the flow of people and wealth from the City of London. This is an example of what I call an irreversible change from Brexit.

Pornservatives

The Conservatives still find themselves with a number of ministers in post with some kind of sexual offences lodged against them. I fail to understand how this can be allowed. In times past, the Profumo affair was sufficient to topple the career of an eminent MP. But this is Brexit Britain, where sex, drugs and rock’n’roll are part of the daily diet of our elected politicians. Neil Parish, Rob Roberts, Imran Ahmad Khan, David Warburton, Chris Pincher, Charlie Elphicke, Damien Green, Andrew Griffiths, Rob Roberts and the Tory rapists. I’ve added an ‘s’ to rapist, as I’m sure that, like buses with £350 million painted on the side, another one will be along in a moment.

Pornservatives
Let’s talk about BREX baby … click image to read the book.
Johnson to give oral (evidence). PG rated.

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From the vault : Sunny Brexit Uplands

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Daily Maul

Honey, I shredded the evidence

In this edition of the Daily Maul we look at how the populist media keep us focused on dead cats rather than the things that affect our futures … To read more of these please check out Private Eyelines. The book makes an excellent gift for Brexiteers in regret. Private Eyelines provides a sense of uplift for people who are sick to death of fascist Nat-C Brexit Britain. Here’s some hard facts and fiction busters to help you navigate today’s papers.

Cash ‘n’ Carrie

FACT : Carrie Johnson is NOT delivering the 3rd Johnson baby on Thursday at 4pm as far as we know. However, a public inquiry about Johnson’s conduct is in progress. Baroness Hallett has called for Johnson’s WhatsApp messages to help with that inquiry. It therefore seems terribly convenient that Carrie is up the duff. Swivel headed Tory loon Andrea Jenkyns said that we must leave Johnson alone, as Carrie is having a baby. Johnson literally did leave Carrie alone, by jetting off to the US to earn millions on the conference circuit, instead of spending time in his Uxbridge constituency and supporting his wife.

By giving Johnson more time to produce the evidence, it gives Johnson more time to delete messages that would incriminate him. In case you think that this witch hunt is bad form, never forget that Johnson’s decisions caused 30 000 unnecessary deaths. These were political CHOICES and not necessities. Ethics matter if you are leading the country through a pandemic. People misunderstand the difference between leadership and comedy.

FICTION : As far as we know Johnson has NOT shagged Andrea Jenkyns. His diary is full. Doubtless Nadine will be trying to access Johnson’s binbag.

To distract us, this is what the papers actually say today. Who gives a flying fuck what Holly Willoughby is doing?

You are being taken for fools.

Whats Appened?

FACT : Rishi Sunak has said that he does not think it would be helpful for the COVID inquiry to see his WhatsApp messages, claiming that they would be irrelevant. In the words of the Police “if you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to fear sir”. What might Rishi be wishing to hide? FICTION : as far as we know, Rishi Sunak has not ordered more shredders for The Cabinet Office. It already has plenty from the Johnson era.

Cats Against Brexit Mayhem

FICTION : Larry the cat has NOT been arrested, nor beaten up by the Met Police. FACT : We don’t know if Matt Hancock has deleted WhatsApp. We do know that he gave out COVID PPE contracts to people with no experience of making medical devices. He also gave special access to Tory donors, irrespective of whether they were experienced PPE manufacturers. We know that much of the PPE did not work. We know that this cost the earth when a more responsible approach was needed in a crisis. We also know that reputable manufacturers were ignored in favour of pub landlords and personal friends. Michelle Mone and Dido Harding are still at large.

Join us at Cats Against Brexit Mayhem

WHATS APPENED? Read more by clicking the image.
The real Daily Mail today – Leading through FURY, shock horror and plain lies.

The Daily Mail, Express, Sun et al systematically delete and downgrade inconvenient truths whilst distracting us with trivia and hyperbolic headlines. Many people almost literally eat their lies for breakfast. It works because many people would either prefer oblivion or entertainment to the awful truths about Brexit, the cost of living, global collaboration, wars and so on. Despite what many would say, these big issues DO affect our daily lives. One of the things the populist media wish to distract us from today is the simply appalling CPTPP trade deal that we did not vote for. Nor does it make up for the losses from Brexit in any way shape or form. The CPTPP deal will only contribute 1/50th of that needed just to stand still after Brexit. And that only after 10+ years. CPTPP contribution to GDP is + 0.08% over 10 years. Brexit losses worth MINUS 4% GDP. Do the math. Simply stated:

CPTPP gains + 0.08% Brexit losses – 4% GDP

Cold Chain Shane misrepresenting CPTPP on BBC Radio 4.

This film we made about Boris Johnson’s burned Brexit deal way back is now coming home to roost. All the Brexit carnage was baked in by Johnson and now we are in ‘Brexit fire sale mode’, willing to make deals at ANY cost.

Reject the lies. Reject the Maul, Excess, Son, Telegravda. Reject Brexit

Join us to end Brexit Chaos : Wed 7 June 8pm UK time on ZOOM

Read more : The stench of corruption

Read more : Books to change minds on Brexit

Brexit Chaos

Brexit Cabinet Chaos

Read our latest article on Brexit Cabinet Chaos at Bylines Scotland, Cabinet of chaos, crisis and confusion. The brilliant surrealistic image by Dr Patricia Dos Santos Paton, sums up the leadership behind the disaster formerly known as Brexit. It should be exhibited in the Tate Modern. Here is a teaser from the article:

If you were a Martian leadership consultant reading about the politics of the curious island of Brexit Britain, here are just a few of the earthly facts that would come up on your alien console:

  1. We have had thirteen years of Conservative government.  Brexit has consumed five Prime Ministers (and counting). 
  2. Austerity on steroids swung the Brexit vote by 12%. It would have been 60:40 without Nigel Farage’s weaponisation of austerity.
  3. Brexit has failed to ‘take back control’ of immigration, now running at record levels compared with 2016. Only 9% of people in Britain care about immigration. Suella Braverman has manufactured the matter through demonisation of the small boats issue and use of the mainstream media to install ‘TORID 2023’ – a mind virus that spreads through physical and online contact with the Daily Mail, Express and Sun.
  4. The planned mega funeral pyre of 4000 EU laws is now a smokeless fire pit.  The Minister for the 18th Century Jacob Rees-Mogg continues to pretend that Brexit will give us cheaper training shoes if only we would ‘believe more’.
  5. Brexit has contributed to the wages-price spiral with identifiable impacts on food prices and wages in some sectors. 1/3 of food inflation is attributable to Brexit.
  6. The Tories continue to receive funding from Russia to break Britain.
  7. Brexit continues our love affair with killing planet earth.
  8. Our law makers keep breaking the laws that they make.
  9. The much vaunted CPTPP trade deal will only contribute 1/50th of that needed just to stand still after Brexit. And that only after 10+ years. CPTPP contribution to GDP + 0.08% in 10 years. Brexit losses worth MINUS 4% GDP. Do the math.
  10. Just under 1/5th of the UK population now support Brexit. But our politicians remain (sic) stuck in a 2016 time warp that says Brexit was the will of the people. It no longer is. Just 12 million from 68 million people voted for Brexit.

Read the full article at Bylines Scotland. If Rishi Sunak wishes to win an election, he would be well advised to move towards the centre of politics, to steal Keir Starmer’s clothes. I fear however that he will be forced to lurch inexorably to the far right by Badenoch, Mordaunt, Farage, Coffey, Tice, Putin, Truss et al. to maintain the appearance of unity. This will be their undoing. Essentially Rishi is ‘Sunakered’, as I stated on LBC with James O’Brien recently.

Bylines Scotland
All by myself – Liz Truss – Click on one of the cabinets to read the article. Image by the artist formerly known as Patricia Dos Santos Paton.
Bylines Scotland
The Truss era … 46 days. Article extract.
Bylines Scotland
Sunakered. Click to view the full article at Bylines Scotland.

Join us to end Brexit Cabinet Chaos : Wed 7 June 8pm UK time on ZOOM

Read more : Books to change minds on Brexit

Read more : Plus ca change – Liars in chief

Read more : Car Crash

Brexit bunker

Brexit breakdown

Don Adamson reports the news that the papers refuse to print. Don writes from his Brexit bunker in Barnsley.

When a child is born

This week’s homework: Discuss the following statements:

1. Johnson fanzine has announced that Princess Nut Nuts is expecting again. This is (says the Daily Mail) Johnson’s 8th child. There are probably more that we do not know of. Johnson objects to contraception for ecological reasons. He is against single use plastic. Gammons and flagshaggers will tell you that genetics count for more than experience or learning. That being Johnson and his ilk should be forcibly vasectomised.

2. Johnson is the diarrhoea that keeps on giving.

3. Discuss the following statement: ‘Gentlemen in England now abed will hold their manhood cheap and think themselves accursed they were not here.’ Shakespeare reckoned without Johnson, Nigel Garbage and other Brexit war heroes who brag about their superlative gallantry in wars that ended before they were born. Did Shakespeare get it wrong or is it more a case of Johnson, Nigel Garbage and other Brexit war heroes may be a lot of things but they are not gentlemen? 

Coincidence or cock up?

Have Patience

This week’s quotes: “Lady Patience Wheatcroft is not in favour with the Tories after shifting from the Tory benches to the cross benches and, while once reliably Conservative, has made her opposition to Brexit clear … after voting for Brexit Bournemouth is in deep remorse, with the Lib Dems establishing themselves as the dominant force on  the local council … Dorset Chamber of Commerce complained that Brexit was having ‘serious detrimental impact on exports’… not delivering the positives that were promised … Scotland may yet prove a steep uphill climb for Labour while it continues to be pro Brexit … don’t write off the SNP … Labour’s position on the EU and the Lib Dem’s ambivalence … will be an open door for The SNP at the next election … ‘Voter ID’ did not help the Tories … next they will stipulate that the only valid proof of ID will be a Tory Party membership card … inaugural conference of the Conservative Democratic organisation, convened by those Tories horrified by the sudden leftward lurch into outright Communism that the party has taken under Richy Scumbag (stop laughing) … Jacob Grease Bogg … perhaps still stung by the fact that during his tenure as Secretary of State for Brexit Opportunities he never found any …. started plucking Brexit benefits from his limited imagination … spectacular Bulwarks even by Grease Bogg standards …

Have Patience.

Anger is an energy

Commons Speaker Sir Lindsay Hoyle is incensed … If Lindsay Hoyle is angry with Tories then they really are running out of friends … Johnson leans on rich friends for freebies … on 25 separate occasions since August he has passed through Heathrow airports palatial Windsor Suite. At £1,800 a pop the suite is part of Heathrow’s VIP experience. He has received almost £50,000 in lounge hospitality alone …£250,000: Johnson’s legal fees funded by the taxpayer…. £2.5M advance Johnson received from speaking agency in January … 

Surrey Heath council covers Gove’s constituency was won by the Lib Dems … Reigate and Banstead is now the only council in Surrey where Tories have a majority . Right across the stockbroker belt Tory ministers and ex ministers saw control of councils go to the Lib Dems’… another example of this government’s neglect and mismanagement…

Abandon ship

NHS is now so overloaded that delays and human errors are inevitable and increasing … subject to aggressive litigation … as if doctors needed another reason to abandon the NHS …  a recent survey by the Medical Protection society of doctors who had been reported to the GMC in the past five years … nearly a third had experienced suicidal thoughts … NHS has always been reliant on overseas trained doctors, even more so now that many UK trained doctors are leaving …

GMC has adopted 23 recommendations to stamp out bias against ethnic minority doctors. A greater problem is that GMC expects impossibly high standards of performance in a crumbling health service with more complaining patients … workload is higher than the service can competently manage … Regime’s ineptitude. Hobbled by Cronyism and graft … economy is creating fewer opportunities … less direct foreign investment …  danger of accelerating, perhaps violent, decline …

Nowhere man

We have no clue what Starmer really believes in … will not tell us what our post Brexit relationship with EU should be … Britain’s Public Order Act goes too far … UN High Commissioner for Human Rights said it imposed ‘serious and undue restriction’ … fears of erosion of civil liberties in Britain … Further indication of Home Office authoritarian tendencies …. a law does not need to put people in prison to do damage … further eroding trust in the police following a series of dreadful scandals at the Met … badly written law … hard to justify a move to Britain … Britain’s car industry is another pressure point ….

Under pressure

Steelmaking is also under strain …  too many unanswered questions … Brexit upheavals add to uncertainty. …  Over 2M British homes suffer from disrepair that pose a risk to public health … costs to NHS estimated at £290M a year …Tories and Britain would like to forget about Thick Lizzie … on tour … to chide the enemies of freedom and stand up to China … given her record it is surprising people listen to her … calls for an ‘economic NATO to stand up to China … (COMMENT: There is one: the EU) … Thick Lizzie may be the least successful PM in British history … emblematic of deeper problems in government … complains about having no control (COMMENT: Surely that is the whole point of Brexit?) … 

Private Eyelines
Extract from Private Eyelines – click to view.

Migration observatory

Braverman complains about 1M immigrants to UK this year without mentioning that she is responsible …  Thick Lizzie is a problem for the Tories not because she is the exception but because she is the rule … her ideas live on … Johnson intervenes only if he thinks it will enhance his slim chances of a return to power … loony economic policies … Fox News fired *ucker Carlson … viewership fell from 3M during his final week to 1.5 the following week … biggest beneficiary has been Newsmax, even further right than Fox … viewership rose from 150,000 to nearly 500,000 ..

Praise the Lords

Loss of Carlson’s divisive populism has led 1.15M people to abandon conservative cable news in prime time…  Performance in the House of Lords by Lord Johnson of Lainston … caused despair even on Tory benches … decline in car manufacturing is an especially depressing example of Brexit affecting industry … Johnson saw it as an opportunity to take puerile swipes at the EU … disturbing comments by Cur James Dyson (COMMENT: notorious Brexiter) that the government was not on the side of industry …

Lord Fox (Lib Dems) said industry was at a watershed … car manufacturers would simply go to France or Germany … one Tory peer said waves of political appointees have made Tory benches a laughing stock … worst fears for the Lords realised … gift for the abolitionists ….

Gammon corner

All Perspectives is still pumping money into GB News despite £33M losses … takes funds injected by investors to  £120M … Who can explain what Labour’s economic policy is? … numbers raising their hands to answer alarmingly low … at Derby …’Is Brexit going well or badly? Result Well 0% Badly 100% … Same in Edinburgh and Glasgow … populists love to inflame their fellow believers with slogans, myths for a past that never was … recent National Conservative conference  highlighted the threat of the far right … most mainstream Tories wisely stayed away.

Why Michael Gove chose to appear is baffling (COMMENT: Not baffling to me – Gove is a Murdoch lackey of the worst description) … strange and unsettling London conference … home to an evangelical Christian church … Johnson was hardly more popular than Scumbag…. inward looking, illiberal, censorious conservatism … nostalgia for a rose tinted past … fuelled by anger, pessimism, paranoia and disdain for any who disagree …  portray opponents as sinister and evil. Object furiously when the same accusations are levelled at them … demonisation of anybody to the left of them; which is probably 95% of the British population….

Nat-C Party

NATcees assertion of moral superiority … no acknowledgement that they have won four successive elections and might themselves be responsible for the dire state of the nation … Braverman distanced herself from an immigration which she has been in charge of for 7 months … Johnson was the embodiment of selfish reckless individualism that they now decry … Rees Mogg did admit that requiring ID cards to votes was a failed attempt at gerrymandering … hailed Brexit … none thought fit to mention the calamitous consequences of Brexit … has actually boosted immigration …

Braverman castigated the ‘prognosticators of doom’ who said Brexit would be a catastrophe … Tory Party beginning to fragment into warring factions as it faces an electoral drubbing … an ugly search for scapegoats … sensible Conservatives stayed away … 

Don Adamson Pip Pip             Medway Delta (Retired)           Brexorcist and Saboteur First Class    

Read more : Brexit under the microscope 

From the vault : Five years of Brexit

Alphonse Karr

Plus ça change

Here are some simple comparisons between what politicians said in 2022 versus just a few months on in 2023, for busy people who can detect liars and cheats. Plus ça change.

Boris Johnson - Plus ça change
‘If you’ve nothing to hide, you’ve nothing to fear sir” – The Police.

Boris Johnson’s diary is the political equivalent of Tom Riddle’s blank notebook which hid many secrets in ‘Harry Potter’. Johnson’s diary keeps delivering its dirty secrets. Accordingly, I imagine he also wished it had been written in invisible ink. Johnson had insisted that no rules were broken all through 2021 and 2022. It turns out that these were lies. Now in 2023, it turns out that Johnson’s official diaries have been handed over to the Police and he has refused to provide details of comments made about Sarah Everard, the woman murdered by the Metropolitan Police. Johnson insists that there is nothing to see here. His track record suggests otherwise. Never forget that Johnson’s decisions led to the unnecessary deaths of 30 000 vulnerable people.

Rishi Sunak - Plus ça change
Sunakered – Click image to listen to our radio interview on the matter.

No sooner than making a big policy statement on stopping the boats, Rishi Sunak rowed back on the proposal, now that official figures show that more that net migration exceeded 600 000 in 2022. Brexit was supposed to ‘take back control of our borders’. It didn’t. See Brexit has failed.

Join us to plan for change : Wed 7 June 8pm UK time via ZOOM

Jeremy Hunt - Plus ça change
Brexit Broke Britain.

Jeremy Hunt is now willing to allow UK to slide into recession in order to cut inflation whereas he previously was not. Of course, all these things are a delicate balance and Britain is exposed to global factors. That said, Brexit destroyed Britain’s resilience to face global headwinds and, unlike these effects, Brexit is a self-inflicted choice which we did not need to make. By comparison, the EU demonstrated resilience in the face of Brexit as this book demonstrates. Brexit Broke Britain.

Brexit Broke Britain.
Kemi Badenoch - Plus ça change
Flip flop Bad Enoch Powell.

Kemi Badenoch flip flops literally on a daily basis. She is a climate denier and a Brexiteer. These things are often correlated in Venn diagrams. Now the Nigerian fraudster U-turned on the bonfire of Brexit laws, angering her ERG handlers. Accordingly, just like Liz Truss, Kemi Badenoch demonstrates the toxic cocktail of confidence and incompetence.

She attacked her own department for reporting the abysmal trade figures from the much trumpeted CPTPP trade deal that she signed in desperation. The deal contributes 0.08% over TEN years. We will need some 50 such deals JUST to stand still to match the 4% GDP LOSS from Brexit. There are not 50 trading blocs to make deals with … Plus ça change.

From The Telegraph of all places!
Suella Braverman - Plus ça change
Suella Braverman, a former Attorney General, thinks that the law is for others to keep.

Suella Braverman is yet another enigma. An economic migrant who hates migrants. Also, Braverman is a Brexiteer who benefited more than most from EU freedoms through her ERASMUS backed studies in France. A racist who is married to a Jewish man. Furthermore, a former Attorney General who believes she is above the law. Here’s a few hard facts about the lies put forward on immigration by Lord Callanan et al. on BBC Any Questions yesterday in a Twitter thread for sharing:

Read the full Twitter thread. I nearly got on BBC Any answers to say this, but the programme was fully occupied by the current outrage on social care. Plus ça change!

Rishi Sunak supports Braverman, mainly because he is weak. Sunak also feels he must support her illegal, immoral and indecent approaches to asylum seekers, because he is frightened of her and the people who hide in the shadows behind her. Watch our two minute film on fixing immigration below and listen to our latest interview with James O’Brien on LBC.

Sunak does not want to stop the boats even though answers are available.

Plus ça change : Brexit Chaos

Plus ça change : Farage’s death

Scot Bylines : Brexit STEM impacts